


When I grow up

by better_times_are_coming



Series: Kids These Days [5]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Adoption, Angst, Attempt at Humor, Babysitting, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Minor Character Death, Slice of Life, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-04
Updated: 2019-11-03
Packaged: 2019-11-09 04:07:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 53,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17994548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/better_times_are_coming/pseuds/better_times_are_coming
Summary: Everything from the Kids These Days Universe that didn't make it into the main chapters (plus the occasional prompt).1. Jihoon takes Chan to an award show. Fluff ensues.2. Babysitting five kids sounds like a challenge, Soonyoung is about to find out why.3. Seungcheol comes back to Daegu.4. Wonwoo and Junhui are definitely hiding something, but it might not be what everyone thinks it is.5. Junhui leaves one house behind (only to find home).6. The Yoon family goes grocery shopping.7. Seungcheol and Jeonghan try to teach Chan how to swim (+ Soonyoung dwells on his parenting skills).8. Halloween preparations get an emotional twist in the Yoon’s household.[Each chapter is a separate story, so you don't need to read this whole series to understand each one of them.]





	1. Jihoon+Chan/Babysitting

**Author's Note:**

  * For [DojoDojo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DojoDojo/gifts), [dontwannabehereanymore](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontwannabehereanymore/gifts).



> For my favorite Jihoon's stan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags for this chapter: Domestic fluff, Babysitting, Tooth rooting fluff.

As soon as Jihoon stopped the car in front of the Yoon household, he started to regret this.

Not because he didn’t _like_ Chan (he adored the little brat the most), but because when he agreed to take care of Chan’s birthday present he hadn’t exactly expected this.

Only a few weeks ago, Soonyoung had been talking to Jeonghan over the phone, and _of course_ his partner had just decided it’d be a great idea to announce while they talked, that they had been invited to the most awaited music awards of the year.

It wasn’t like they usually didn’t get invited, they _did_ , ever since Soonyoung had been choreographing the dances of Zodiac, the new rookie group everyone adored (Soonyoung’s words, not his) and Jihoon’s songs had been getting more recognition.

The new thing was their four year old _nephew_ of some sorts, hearing the news and then asking again and again and _again_ if he could please, please, _please_ , go, because he’d “behave” and “be good” and they wouldn’t even “notice he was there”.

Jihoon didn’t think so.

But still… Chan assured them he was the biggest fan of Zodiac and Jeonghan had implied that it’d be a good early birthday present for the boy _and_ Seungcheol had said _please._

Damn them.

So Jihoon had agreed.

And now he found himself at the driveway, all suited up, wondering _why_ had he done this to himself.

He wasn’t good at taking care of children, and Soonyoung wouldn’t even be there to help, he had decided he’d be there to lift the kids’ spirits before the award show, since it was the first time they had gotten nominated, but Jihoon suddenly wished he would have insisted a little more in making Soonyoung join him.

Now he’d have to endure the red carpet and the award ceremony all by himself, well… with Chan.

He groaned, covering his face.

Maybe he didn’t have to go.

Maybe he could just miss it.

He was only a producer and barely on the rise, no one would notice his absence… except that when he thought about Soonyoung’s disappointed expression, it just… made his stomach flip in an unpleasant way.

He couldn’t do that to him.

So he _didn’t_ do that to him and got out of the car, straightened his clothes, and knocked on his friends’ door.

The response was immediate.

“Uncle Jihoon!” Chan _threw_ himself at him, hugging him tight around the waist and stepping all over his Gucci shoes.

Way to go.

“Ah, Channie, at least let Uncle Jihoon get in, okay?” Seungcheol’s voice appeared and swooped Chan from the hug, giving Jihoon enough space to step inside, his cheeks a little red after the affectionate greeting.

“It’s fine.” He assured him right away, because Chan’s expression faltered a little, but then he smiled right away, giggling a little as Seungcheol held him to his chest.

Chan looked _so_ happy.

It was a bit endearing.

He was wearing a white shirt and black slacks too and he looked _so_ tiny to be wearing that that Jihoon almost cooed.

“How are you?” Seungcheol asked, wrapping an arm around his friend’s shoulders and patting the small of his back.

Jihoon hugged back, as Chan excitedly reached out to be picked up by him again.

“Good. Um, where’s Wonwoo and Seungkwan?” He asked, when he noticed how silent the house was.

They weren’t coming along, but Wonwoo wasn’t very enthusiastic over idols anyway and Seungkwan had refused since Girls Generation weren’t attending…

 _And_ it was Chan’s birthday present so.

Seungcheol placed a kiss on the top of Chan’s head and handed him over, so Jihoon could hold him.

He complied, and at the moment he did, Chan bounced up and down in his hip, placing a big wet kiss on Jihoon’s cheek, telling him how excited he was.

Over the four year old excited blabber, Jihoon managed to catch Seungcheol’s response.

(With great difficulty.)

“They’re out in the movies with Minghao and Mingyu.” Seungcheol told him, watching the interaction with a fond expression, probably laughing on the inside at how flustered Jihoon looked.

Jihoon hated him a little.

“Evening, Uncle Jihoonie.” Footsteps approached the entry and Jeonghan appeared, a smug smile playing on his lips, probably because how awkward Jihoon looked trying to keep Chan on his hip.

Who knew an overly excited four year old would be already this hard to handle?

Jihoon wondered if he could make it through today. 

It seemed like a challenge already. 

“Baby, how about we go to the bathroom before you have to leave, okay?” Jeonghan offered his arms to Chan, who looked like he wanted to refuse (Jihoon got a little worried about that, he hadn’t thought about bathroom routines and everything) but then he gingerly reached to Jeonghan, pouting but only a little as he got carried away. “We’ll be right back.”

As soon as Chan and Jeonghan left the living room and headed upstairs, Jihoon took a deep breath, bracing himself for this.

He didn’t think he was good at babysitting and he usually didn’t do it all by himself, besides Chan was… a lot to handle sometimes and Jihoon didn’t want to make any mistakes.

He didn’t want to upset him, or maybe he’d get bored, it was an award ceremony, it’d be long and tiring even for him and–

“He didn’t take his afternoon nap because he was so excited, you know,” Seungcheol commented casually and Jihoon resisted the urge to grimace at that.

Great.

Jihoon could only hope that he’d manage to live up to the boy’s expectations, because he didn’t want to disappoint him.

Besides it was his _only_ birthday present so far, it needed to be perfect.

Only thinking about Chan crying or being sad made him feel like the worst.

“You don’t need to worry, Jihoonie.”  Seungcheol assured, as if he had just read his thoughts. “He’ll have a great time, he really likes you.”

Something warm spread through Jihoon’s chest and it must have showed, because Seungcheol gave him another one of those fond smiles, as he knew exactly what he was thinking about.

“And you love him too, so no need to fret.”

Jihoon didn’t exactly know what to reply to that, but luckily, he didn’t have to, because Jeonghan and Chan came back and he was handed a bag with Chan’s things just in case, and then they helped him with the carseat and they told him to call if anything happened and _then_ they said their goodbyes (Seungcheol looked like he was happy to spend some alone time with Jeonghan, whereas Jeonghan looked a little teary eyed at the prospect of letting the youngest go, or maybe just happy that he looked happy?)

And then they were off to the award show.

Jihoon tried to take Seungcheol’s advice and not to fret.

It was hard, but he could try.

***

Jihoon didn’t like red carpets.

He didn’t like the hassle, the massive amount of cameras pointing at him, the awkward questioning, the _spotlight_ and everything that came with it.

Usually he came with someone else, so he’d stay silent and that’d be it, but now it was _only_ them.

Jihoon would be lying if he said his heart didn’t start beating a little faster at that.

He was just in the line, the MC already saying goodbye to the idol group she had been interviewing.

Okay, this needed to be done now.

As soon as they stepped up, they were surrounded by flashing, and a few reactions too, surprised ones and he thought he heard people gushing about how good they looked, but he tried not to focus on that, instead he just bowed (Chan did the same, adorable).

“Lee Jihoon-ssi, producer of—” Jihoon only focused on the cameras for a second, then his eyes traveled down, where Chan was holding his clammy palm.

The boy looked amazed, mouth agape as he stared at all the photographers, and Jihoon had the sudden urge to squeeze Chan’s hand, only to reassure him if he was too overwhelmed by it all.

He did and Chan looked up, beaming up at him.

Ah, that was nice.

He looked cute, with his tiny suit and his slightly curly hair.

He had dimples too, and _okay_ , maybe he hadn’t met Seungcheol when he was this young, but when he was eight he certainly had them and every time he looked at Chan, even if he knew he wasn’t blood related to Seungcheol, it gave him the same feeling.

Jihoon was endeared.

“Will you tell us who joins you tonight, Jihoon-ssi?” The MC asked, with a tone that implied that she asked that already and Jihoon got pulled out of his thoughts, nodding quickly.

Right, that was probably everyone’s question right now.

“He’s my…” Best-friend-brother-like’s adopted son? “Nephew.”

The crowd immediately started whispering, but Jihoon ignored it, if anyone wanted to comment on it, then so be it, he was good at closing down interviews anyway.

Luckily the MC looked undeterred and Jihoon mentally thanked her for it.

“You’re wearing matching jackets too! It’s adorable.” She gushed (Jihoon wouldn’t thank her for bringing that up now).

He just tried to not to grimace.

Damn Yoon Jeonghan.

He didn’t know _how_ , but somehow Jeonghan had found out what he’d be wearing (a dark blue velvet jacket) and _he_ had gotten Chan the same one, but in baby blue.

(And he had _also_ put it in the car’s trunk so Jihoon wouldn’t notice it right away).

For a fleeting moment, Jihoon thought it might have been Seungcheol’s idea, but he wouldn’t have the resolve nor the patience (or the liking for shopping) as Jeonghan did.

Besides Jeonghan would go miles away to tease him and embarrass him in public TV.

And _maybe_ , by some people standards, it was adorable, but Jihoon hated to be called cute.

Chan looked delighted though, cheeks pink as he waved a little at the cameras and he got even _more_ flashing on his way.

He squealed a little on his spot and hid behind Jihoon’s legs, causing loud cooing in response.

“About your last single _Downpour_ , what do you want fans to—” Jihoon heard the question, he totally did, but he couldn’t focus in anything other than the pull Chan kept on his jacket.

It got tighter by the minute.

Suddenly all the noise was gone and people around them too, it was only them and Jihoon noticed the way Chan reached for him with his other hand, the motion familiar for when he wanted to be picked up.

“Uncle,” He whispered, looking hesitant as he tugged a bit more on his jacket. “Can we leave now?” He asked, pointing the end of the red carpet.

Jihoon blinked up at him, he looked scared all of the sudden and maybe the attention had been a little too much.

He understood.

“Ah,” Chan’s eyes went wide, as if he had just remembered. “Please?”

Jihoon didn’t hesitate after that.

“I worked diligently on this album, hope you enjoyed it.” He said briskly, bowing quickly and tugging on Chan’s hand back, so he’d follow.

But the boys’ eyes were glued to the crowd and the cameras pointing at him, and Jihoon panicked at the thought that he’d _cry_ in front of them so he bowed again and quickly picked him up, leaving the red carpet with Chan on his arms.

“Chan-ah?” He asked, once they were out of everyone’s earshot. “You okay?”

Chan had hid in the crook of his neck at the moment Jihoon had picked him, but he felt him nod and Jihoon relaxed.

He didn’t consider himself the most protective person in the world, but if someone did something to hurt Chan’s feelings… heads would roll.

But Chan was there, just hugging him tight and cuddling with him, so Jihoon allowed himself to sigh in relief.

It was okay, they had survived.

***

Chan’s attention span was _not_ good.

Not because he was trying to annoy Jihoon or anything, he was just a soon-to-be five year old with enough sugar on his system to be on his seat, then on Jihoon’s phone, then on his lap, then staring curiously around, all in _ten_ minutes.

Jihoon didn’t know _how_ the award show kept the boy (mostly) entertained for an hour, but he was glad that it had.

Luckily Zodiac was halfway in the schedule as well, because Jihoon figured that if Chan got too tired, he could always tell him that he’d drop him at his parents’ house and he’d be right back to see if Soonyoung’s kids (as if he called the members) would win in their category or not.

Chan had always enjoyed all sort of performances, and he didn’t care about idols particularly, but something about these girls (and Jihoon figured it had to do with Soonyoung choreographing all of their dances so far) made Chan get really interested in them.

The kid had always admired Soonyoung and that was _why_ Soonyoung also sent him videos or invited him over when he was dancing.

It was also the only moment of the day where Chan could sit still and watch something.

When the familiar music started playing, Chan’s head snapped up, jumping a little on his spot as his eyes fixed on the performance, mimicking the movements as best as he could as he watched.

Jihoon was endeared.

He also pulled out his phone and recorded him, just because he figured Jeonghan and Seungcheol would appreciate seeing the boy enjoying himself.

(He also thought he’d make a great dancer one day and he wanted Chan to have some throwback videos for when he was older).

Jihoon didn’t even notice when he first song had ended until Chan started tugging on his sleeve, pointing at the stage.

“Uncle, that was so cool, the clothes were so pretty and the jump was _woah_ and it was so cool!” He repeated, enthusiastically.

If he was being honest with himself, Jihoon had missed the whole performance as he watched Chan enjoy it, but… he just couldn’t help it.

Chan was adorable and he was doing this only for him, otherwise he’d have just stayed backstage with Soonyoung, it’d be much more comfortable, but seeing him like this… it made him think that it was all worth it and that Chan would _definitely_ remember this birthday.

If kids this age could.

“This is the best day ever.” Chan whispered, almost as if to himself and Jihoon almost swooned.

That was the most adorable thing that Chan had said, ever since Jihoon had met him.

He looked so excited too, if his ear to ear smile was anything to go by.

 _Then_ the music for the second song started.

And things had changed.

The song was different.

Must have been a remix or something.

“It’s different.” Chan confirmed, going really _still_ and Jihoon was invaded by a sense of dread.

This couldn’t be good.

“W—why is it different?” Chan’s voice started to waver and Jihoon properly panicked now.

He wasn’t prepared for this.

“I… I wanted it to be the same,” He whispered, eyes filling with tears, his shoulders started to shake too, as if his body couldn’t contain his distress.

Jihoon felt the same.

“Uncle, it’s _so_ different.” The sob that left Chan’s mouth was only the first one to come, because then he covered his face, dropping back into his seat as he wept.

Oh no.

No, no, no, no, _no_.

“Ah, no, wait, Chan-ah, don’t cry.” Jihoon asked, taking him into his arms as he started to get a few weird looks from around him.

Damn this.

“Shh, come on.” He rubbed his back up and down and decided it’d be the best to just carry him backstage, although he’d be missing the second part of the performance and maybe Soonyoung would whine to him about that later.

But if he stayed like this… Jihoon could see the youtube video already.

 _Lee Jihoon reacts to Zodiac’s Highlight_ , and then a six minute video of him trying to stop a toddler from bawling his eyes out.

“Look, look, they’re performing their new song, you like that one.” Jihoon tried, pointing at the stage. “It’s just slightly different, they’re mixing up the—”

“ _Uncle_ ,” Chan whined and Jihoon took a deep breath, deciding to carry him outside.

He just couldn’t help to hear him like that any longer, and now he understood why Jeonghan and Seungcheol did everything for this little boy.

 _Anything_ to keep him from crying or being upset.

“Want to go for a walk?” Chan shook his head. Stubborn little thing. “Want something to eat?”

A small halt in his shaky breathing.

“N—no.”

Jihoon bounced him a little, and Chan only hid in his neck, refusing to look at him.

This wasn't good.

“Come on, let’s get you something to drink, you must be thirsty after… yelling all those fanchants.”

He waited.

Not good at all.

No reply.

It was as good as he was going to get, so Jihoon cradled the back of Chan’s head, letting him slump against his hold and headed to the backstage.

Luckily he knew this venue, and he could easily find a vending machine.

As he walked though, he wondered if maybe bringing Chan here had been a good idea after all…

He must have looked weird, he knew he looked awkward every time he took a child into his arms considering he wasn’t very tall, but with Chan it felt different.

It wasn’t _that_ bad to comfort him, he didn’t feel that lost.

He didn’t feel the immediate need to call Jeonghan or Seungcheol if anything happened.

“Okay, Chan.” Jihoon said gently, when they reached the hallway and stood in front of a vending machine. “Chan.”

The four year old let out a small whine, but at least he didn’t seem to be crying…

“Chan-ah,” He repeated. “Come on, you can pick any of those.”

Slowly but surely Chan pulled away from Jihoon’s chest, eyes red from crying and upper lip filled with snot, instead of being grossed out, Jihoon wished he had a tissue to wipe his nose.

He had seen Seungcheol wiping his kids’ noses with his bare hand, but Jihoon didn’t think he was _there_ just yet.

“Look, you have a lot to pick from.” Jihoon insisted, a little unsure himself, wondering if he was handling this correctly.

If it worked it meant it was, but if Chan kept crying…

“Any?” He asked, letting go of Jihoon’s suit jacket to point at the drinks.

Jihoon almost let out a sigh in relief and nodded, smiling at him.

“Okay…” Chan wiped his own nose with the back of his sleeve (Jeonghan would not be pleased about that) and then he started pointing. “Banana milk for Wonwoo-hyung, banana milk for Seungcheol-appa,” Chan chanted, suddenly serious. Jihoon hoped he was carrying enough money in his pockets, did he even bring his wallet? “Strawberry milk for Jeonghan-appa and chocolate for Seungkwan-hyung.”

And just then Jihoon started to properly register what was Chan saying.

He was thinking of _everyone_ , not just him and it was sweet.

Scratch that, it was the _sweetest_.

How could this kid who had just cried over a performance be doing this just a few minutes after?

It was unfair.

“And cola.” He pointed in the end.

“You want that one for you?” Jihoon asked, figuring that one out since it was the last. He didn’t think that the kid was supposed to drink caffeine, and besides wasn’t that bad for his teeth anyway? He was torn between saying _no_ right away and calling Jeonghan to ask if he could actually drink it when Chan shook his head, with an offended expression.

He didn’t look sulky about the dance anymore, huh?

“No. This one is for Uncle Jihoonie.” He pouted, crossing his arms against his chest and putting his foot down (metaphorically speaking).

Wait a second, for _him?_

That was… just…

Oh, this kid would be the end of him.

Now he kind of understood _why_ everyone was so whipped over him.

“Right, uh… thank you.” He said, glad that no one (Soonyoung) was there to watch, it’d be embarrassing how he basically stopped functioning after Chan had said that.

Chan gave him a big toothy grin in return, almost if he hadn’t been crying just a second ago, and he nodded.

They should… probably come back, the award show wasn’t done and they could still see the end if they went back now.

Making sure that Chan’s expression wouldn’t falter as he set him down, Jihoon let him on his feet, for the first time noticing the strain that it had caused in his arms.

“Okay.” He knelt down, eyes meeting Chan’s, Jeonghan had taught him this one. “What do you want?”

Chan looked shy, hands behind his back as he swayed a bit (Jihoon thought that maybe it had to so with how sleep deprived he was) and he smiled again.

“Apple juice.”

Jihoon resisted the urge to coo at how adorable he looked and nodded.

“Okay, apple juice and… all you just mentioned it is.”

Honestly, could anyone say no to Chan?

***

“Maybe it’s time for you to sleep.”

“No.”

“Napping is good, you could… nap in the car.”

“No.”

“You must be tired, Seungcheol told me you didn’t—”

“ _No_. Uncle, I wanna stay! I wanna see who wins.” Chan whined, looking properly awake now (just a minute ago his head was lolling between his shoulders and he was sleepily leaning on the armrest of the next person’s seat), but whatever.

And they got _at least_ an hour to go.

“I wanna see who wins!” Chan repeated, whine prominent in his voice and his eyes got a little watery and Jihoon tried to stand up his ground about this.

He should sleep otherwise he’d get cranky, end of the story.

At the same time though… he had only made him stop crying a few minutes ago, he didn’t want to go over the same thing again.

He faintly wondered _how_ Seungcheol and Jeonghan did this all day, he only had three hours and he was exhausted already.

He needed to recharge.

Or Soonyoung’s help, but if he wasn’t getting that, just a ten minute rest would do.

Hell, _he_ needed a nap, not Chan, but anyway.

“But you’re… falling asleep,” He whispered, already losing his resolve and Chan must have caught that, because he crossed his arms against his chest and pouted.

“I wasn’t, Uncle, let me stay, please, please, _please_? I don’t wanna go.”

Damn, he had cracked him the moment he whined and said please.

Jihoon was _weak_ , he had no idea how Seungcheol and Jeonghan did it to put him down for a nap.

Must be some extraordinary parenting skills.

Which meant Jihoon needed a new plan.

“Okay. We’ll stay,” He agreed, and before Chan’s eyes could spark any longer, he quickly added. “But… um, maybe you could sit right here?” Jihoon asked, patting next to him. “This way I’ll… be less cold and you can… join me.”

It was awkward and unreal and maybe (of course) Chan had caught the lie.

He was a kid, but he wasn’t stupid.

Chan looked at him curiously and Jihoon almost shifted on his seat, was he that bad of a liar that a _four_ year old could see right through him?

It was humiliating.

“Not sleepy.” Chan confirmed, looking a little suspicious anyway.

Jihoon thought it was only fair.

“Not sleepy.”

“No nap time.” Chan confirmed, slowly shuffling closer to Jihoon’s seat.

Jihoon welcomed him with open arms, hugging the boy close. He could just thank the universe that at least they weren’t overly surrounded by other idols and singers, because otherwise Jihoon wouldn’t be able to get this done.

It’d be too embarrassing.

It was late, but maybe in an hour or so the award show would be over and Chan would be safe back home.

Jihoon just hoped that he’d end up having a great time… he seemed to have enjoyed the performances of every group, but he had just cried as well…

Jihoon didn’t know what to think of the day as a whole.

“No nap time.” He repeated gently against Chan’s hair, hugging the boy close as he tried not to worry.

Chan did nap.

Actually he slept through the whole rest of the award ceremony until only fifteen minutes were left.

And that minute mark meant something else too.

A sense of dread filled Jihoon as the two MCs who would present the award for best dance performance were up in the stage already.

Jihoon hadn’t seen Soonyoung since they had left the house, and although he knew Soonyoung worried a lot about everything (sometimes he worried too much), he had missed him today.

He wished that he had seen him before this, although he understood why Soonyoung had stayed backstage to support the girls.

They were just teenagers and Soonyoung worried that they wouldn’t get enough support.

Which was heartwarming and everything, but… Jihoon missed him.

A lot.

As carefully as he could, Jihoon shifted so Chan wasn’t sleeping over him and was on his own seat instead.

He didn’t want to wake him in case he reacted after the award.

As the nominees were announced, he tried to prepare himself in the worst case scenario, it was highly unlikely that they’d win today, but still a tiny part of Jihoon thought that they could still make it.

He just didn’t want to get his hopes up.

“The best dance performance for a female group award goes to… Highlight by Zodiac! Congratulations!”

_What?_

Jihoon didn’t realise he had stood up until he tried to reach for the armrest but he could only sway a bit on his feet in response.

That was amazing, unbelievable, not like he didn’t trust Soonyoung to, but these awards shows almost never… oh God, he’s so happy he barely registered the emotional speech and how the kids get all teared up and thank their fans and _Hoshi_.

What an ego boost, but a well deserved one.

He really wanted to hug Soonyoung, and maybe give him a big smooch, but he wasn’t there, and Jihoon wondered _where_ he was, he wanted to see him and—

A big hug pulled him out of his thoughts and he was swept into the air and then back to the floor in a second.

And he didn’t fight the hug, just because he knew exactly who he was.

Soonyoung stood in front of him, hair and clothes a bit disheveled, cheeks red and eyes glistening from happiness and excitement and… something Jihoon wouldn’t know _how_ to put a name to.

“Your choreography won.” Jihoon whispered, as if he couldn’t believe it.

“Well, the kids did,” Soonyoung said, still half laughing.

“They _did_ , but with your—"

“I know, I’m—”

“Congratulations, Soonyoung.” Jihoon said and he hoped it’d convey how _proud_ he was.

If Soonyoung’s big grin was anything to go by, it did.

“Thank you, Jihoonie.” And he looked so happy and proud too, and Jihoon thought he looked the most handsome when he was confident.

Their gazes held for a lingering moment and Jihoon wanted nothing more than to hug him again, hold his hand and maybe kiss him, wanting to both wipe and maintain Soonyoung’s smug smile off his face.

“Uncle?” A groggy voice interrupted their interaction, and Jihoon almost forgot that Chan was sleeping behind them, resting on their seats. “Did… did they win?” He asked sleepily, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

Soonyoung cooed at him and lifted him up, kissing the top of his head as he hugged him.

Chan giggled in response, placing his hands on Soonyoung’s cheeks to gush at him back.

“Yes they did!”

***

“I could get arrested for this.”

He could.

He just hoped he wouldn’t.

 _This_ being Jihoon in the backseat with Chan on his arms (instead of his carseat), because at the moment he had tried to put him there, he had only tightened the hold and when they had tried a little harder, he had just started tearing up.

And they decided to let him sleep on Jihoon’s arms as Soonyoung drove.

“Shush, it’s only a thirty minute drive and as if I would let _anything_ happen to that kid.” Soonyoung waved a hand, smiling wide.

He was all giddy since they had left the venue and Jihoon liked him like this.

Also he was sure that Soonyoung would have been blasting the car’s radio if it weren’t for Chan sleeping peacefully in the backseat.

He was partly inclined to invite him over for drinks and partly inclined to tell him to go home and celebrate more privately, but whatever the outcome he knew Soonyoung would appreciate.

First things first, was to take this boy home.

In the end, Jihoon thought he had had a good time, his suit jacket AND white shirt got all sticky with _something_ Chan had touched, they were carrying an immense amount of soft drinks, Chan’s hair looked like a mess, all wet from when Soonyoung and him decided to dance before they could leave the venue…

But Jihoon had fun.

He wouldn’t have mind if he could have stayed with Chan a little longer.

He couldn’t do that now, because asking Seungcheol and Jeonghan to let him spend a little more with him would be weird, the boy was asleep, the award show was over, it’s just that… Jihoon thought that maybe he’d miss the weight of him in his arms, the tug of his hand and the sound of his laugh.

Ah, this was embarrassing.

Luckily he didn’t have to focus on it any longer, because Soonyoung pulled over and just then he noticed they had already arrived.

Jihoon was in the middle of figuring out _how_ he’d get out of the car with Chan on his arms, when Soonyoung interrupted his thoughts.

“Okay, off we go,” Soonyoung said, opening the car door and Jihoon barely managed to _do_ anything and then Soonyoung was planting a big closed mouth kiss on his lips, holding his face and everything.

 _So_ cheesy.

Jihoon blinked up at him, clearly taken aback.

“Thanks.”

Jihoon hated how his voice trembled a little at his next words.

“What for?”

“You wanted to congratulate me like that, right?” Soonyoung asked and Jihoon hated that he was so transparent or that his partner just knew him too well.

Both options were infuriating right now, because _he_ was supposed to be congratulating Soonyoung, not _Soonyoung_ figuring out what he meant before—

Jihoon grabbed the back of Soonyoung’s neck and kissed him.

He _properly_ kissed him, nipping on his lower lip and everything, just until he heard him lose his breath, just until he felt Soonyoung grabbing the back of his hair in equal enthusiasm.

Truth was that in any other time he wouldn’t have let Soonyoung to get him all riled up, but tonight he was susceptible.

“Hey, lovebirds, can you stop making out on our driveway and get inside? It’s like one am.” Seungcheol shouted and Jihoon flushed bright red.

So much for a private moment.

“HYUNG.” Soonyoung turned towards the house, unbothered by it all. “WE WON.”

Jihoon covered his face and sighed.

He was surrounded by idiots.

(Lovable ones, but still). 

***

“Okay… I’m just going to put you down here.”  Jihoon started, one knee on Chan’s bed and his arms trying to get him to lie down.

Chan didn’t let go.

“Chan. Chan-ah,” He whispered, although the boy was clearly asleep, but Jeonghan had said that it helped when he said things out loud.

It was embarrassing, but it did make things easier.

Jihoon assumed it had to do with those extraordinary parenting skills he had thought about before.

Now could Chan just _please_ lie down and sleep on his bed?

 _Why_ had he told Seungcheol and Jeonghan that _he_ ’d put him down?

Suddenly it wasn’t such a bright idea.

Okay, _maybe_ he could lie down with him and then just… roll him over on his side.

Yup, that’d do.

As carefully as he could, he lied down over the animal themed covers and held his breath as he rested his head on the pillow, okay, first step done, now he—

“It’s hard, isn’t it?” A voice said from the door and Jihoon _almost_ jumped a little.

He was glad that he hadn’t, because it would have woken up Chan and that would be missing the whole purpose of this operation.

“What do you mean _it’s hard_?” Jihoon repeated, trying to sound confident, because he’d not let Seungcheol tease him today. “I _want_ to be here, it’s comfortable.” Jihoon objected, eyes glued to the ceiling, hoping that Seungcheol would miss the blush on his cheeks.

His friend let out a fond chuckle, crossing his arms against his chest as he leaned on the doorframe.

“Don’t you have to work early tomorrow?” Seungcheol asked, clearly amused at his misery.

“Mind your own business.”

Another laugh left Seungcheol’s lips and Jihoon smiled a little, just thinking about today.

It had been a bit of a mess, but still… there were a few things that were still in the back of his mind.

“He bought all of you drinks.”

“Mm?”

“I asked him if he wanted to buy something, and he picked a drink for each of you.” He commented gently, rubbing up and down Chan’s back as he listened to the sound of his calm breathing.

Seungcheol’s confused frown softened, and he smiled instead.

“Oh, yeah, well…” He said sheepishly. “We do that. We think of each other. We’re a family.”

A family.

It wasn’t exactly a foreign concept to Jihoon, but he never thought he had seen it so clearly until now.

It did bring him back another thought, about his _own_ family.

“Soonyoung?” He asked, remembering the kiss and how happy he looked when the MCs announced that _Zodiac_ had won.

“Jeonghannie already pulled out our best liquor to celebrate, so I think you’re already staying anyway.” Seungcheol snickered.

Oh, right.

That’d be nice.

Soonyoung got hyped the most when they celebrated together, he deserved this one.

“We’’ll meet you downstairs.” Seungcheol said, turning off the lights.

“Wait, Cheol—”

“Join us when you can.”

“ _Wait—_ don’t.” The door closed and Jihoon and Chan were left alone. “Damn.”

Jihoon took a deep breath, trying to shift so he could leave the bed, but _nope_ , Chan only shuffled closer, tightening the hold.

Damn Seungcheol.

Now he kind of understand why this kid wouldn’t leave their parents bed, of course, he used this evil technique of hugging you tight, giving you a lot of warmth and making you remember that things were okay and calm and soft and—

Okay, this was a _really_ evil technique.

He registered the faint noise of Soonyoung clacking and Jeonghan’s talking and Seungcheol heading downstairs and he decided to even out his breathing, eyes focusing on the stars stickers on Chan’s ceiling.

He didn’t think he had ever slept with a child before.

There was something… comfortable and nice about it, but at the same time he wondered if he could rest properly if his mind was thinking about not rolling over him or dropping him off the bed.

What if the kid needed anything and Jihoon didn’t wake up?

Only on instinct, his arms wrapped a little tighter around Chan.

It was tempting to go downstairs and celebrate with Soonyoung and Jeonghan and Seungcheol, but at the same time, babysitting today had been _exhausting_ and he needed some rest.

He promised to himself that he’d only stay five minutes.

Then he’d go downstairs.

Chan shifted on his hold, his warm breathing hitting Jihoon’s ear and making him ticklish, but he didn’t mind.

He figured, not for the first time in his life, but maybe for the first time today, that he hadn’t done so badly.

Taking care of Chan had been a challenge, but it was also really nice, how cuddly he got and how nice and sweet he was.

The way he wanted to be hugged, but only by him.

It made Jihoon feel special in a way no one, not even Soonyoung could make him feel. It was… different but so similar at the same time.

Jihoon supposed that _this_ was the real meaning of paternal love.

And maybe, just maybe, he could do this one day.

("Uncle. Uncle. _Uncle_."

"Mm?"

"What are you doing in Channie's bed?"

"I... _ugh_ , it's morning, isn't it? Did I really sleep here?"

Wonwoo gave him a sheepish smile and a shrug.

Damn.

"Could you maybe... not tell that to anyone?" Wonwoo went silent. "Jeonghan already took a photo, didn't he?"

Wonwoo gave him a curt nod and Jihoon only groaned in response.

He was never babysitting _again_.)


	2. Soonyoung/Babysitting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Babysitting five kids sounds like a challenge, Soonyoung is about to find out why.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this happens a few months after "everything is alright", which is why Seokmin is included. Enjoy.  
> (Tags for this chapter: Babysitting, fluff, domestic fluff).

“ _Are you sure you’re going to be okay?_ ”

Soonyoung resisted the urge to roll his eyes at the worried tone his partner used and he nodded, even though Jihoon couldn’t possibly see him.

His eyes drifted to the cause of Jihoon’s predicament, the kids.

All five of them.

Seokmin was staying with them, because _duh_ , he was their son, and the Yoon kids were staying in while Jeonghan and Seungcheol went out on a date (to keep the romance alive) _and_ Minghao and Mingyu were attending an art exhibition together, so Junhui had joined in last second.

Which resulted on _all_ the kids staying at their house on this friday afternoon.

It wasn’t like the five of them weren’t together at either one of their houses, it was just that… usually at least two adults were around to take care of them and this time, apparently Soonyoung would be on his own.

Jihoon was supposed to be there with them, but now he was stuck at work and... Soonyoung couldn’t really blame him because of that.

Inspiration came at the ungodly hours and Soonyoung could relate.

“ _Okay is my middle name!!”_ He assured, fully aware that he had spaced out in a worrying part of the conversation.

“ _You don’t_ have _a middle name, now focus, do you need me to call Cheol and tell him to—_ ”

Soonyoung felt a small pang of guilt creep on him, aware that Jeonghan and Seungcheol barely had any time to spend together all by themselves.

“ _No! Jihoonie, okay. I’m being serious this time, there’s no need for you to worry, it’ll only be for a while, right?_ ”

He only got a small grunt in reply.

He was halfway convincing Jihoon, he knew that much.

Only a bit more…

“ _Soon…_ ” He started again, sounding apprehensive.

Soonyoung didn’t want him to, he wanted Jihoon to work peacefully, he wanted him to believe that he could handle this, that they’d be okay.

“ _Look, I’ve handled them before. All of them._ ” He insisted, leaning back on the counter as he watched Wonwoo making sure that all of the kids (including Junhui, his same age friend) had their homework done before they could play.

 _Adorable_.

“ _They can be a handful sometimes…_ ” Jihoon commented, and Soonyoung _almost_ hummed in agreement, because he loved all of them with his life, but they were _definitely_ a handful.

A handful in a _good_ way, so Soonyoung thought he might make it alive today.

They were just kids, and he was _the_ adult, they’d listen to him.

 _Besides_ , Soonyoung had been a kid once (shocking) and he remembered how to keep them entertained, there was nothing to worry about!

“ _There’s nothing to worry about_ ,” He voiced out, because it had sounded pretty convincing in his head. “ _I’ll be fine. I’ve handled them all separately._ ”

“ _Yes, but it’s not the same—_ ”

“ _Maybe_.” Soonyoung conceded, because otherwise Jihoon wouldn’t let that argument go. “ _But you know me, I adapt, I’ll be fine. It’s just five kids, and Junnie and Wonwoo can already take care of themselves and Seok and Seungkwannie get along just fine, so if you think about it, I only need to take care of Channie._ ”

Jihoon only sighed, which meant that he was already giving up.

“ _And everyone knows I’m Channie’s favorite uncle_ , _so everything will be alright_.” He added, with an end tone. “ _It’s just five kids, how hard can it be?_ ”

…

Truth was, Soonyoung was about to find out.

***

“So, kiddos.” Soonyoung started, clapping his hands. In front of him, Junnie and Chan had taken the floor and the rest of the kids were sprawled on the sofa, listening attentively.

Soonyoung had managed to make them all change from his school clothes and things were looking pretty good right now.

He could almost feel the sweet smell of victory in his nostrils already.

 _Ha!_ he would tell Jihoon, _you were worried about nothing! Of course I can handle myself_ and _five kids!_

“I’m going to be making dinner.” He explained, pointing at the kitchen and everything (Jeonghan said that body language helped with kids, and he was right so far). “And since you’re all done with homework, you can play in the meantime.”

Immediately Seungkwan and Seokmin high fived each other and Chan cheered, while Wonwoo looked just the tiniest bit unconvinced.

Of course he was though, he was thirteen.

“06 liners,” He said, watching between the two eldest, their heads perking up in interest. He hadn’t expected them to want to play anyway, but he did have a better plan. “You can watch a movie if you like.”

Junhui looked pretty excited at the prospect and Wonwoo too, why wouldn’t they? Soonyoung was a genius at babysitting already.

Things would only get better from here.

“You can use our Netflix account. Have fun.” Soonyoung said, with a smile and both Jun and Wonwoo got up from the couch, happy at being dismissed so quickly. “You guys can help me set the table later, okay?” He reminded them, getting an enthusiastic _yes_ from Junhui and a small hum in agreement from Wonwoo, as they climbed up the stairs and to one of the spare rooms, which had the largest TV in the house.

Okay then, three kids left to entertain then.

“Uncle, um, can we play hide and seek?” Seungkwan asked, raising his hand.

Soonyoung’s heart warmed at the gesture, this boy was the sweetest, and he was so helpful, offering activities himself.

“Oh, oh!” Chan rose his hand as well and Soonyoung almost snickered in response, was that a system in the Yoon household? If it did, it certainly seemed like it worked. “Yes, hide-and-seek, Uncle, please?”

He had figured that karaoke was a big no because of that incident in Seokmin’s birthday party, and he had thought that maybe they could play a video game or something, but… the house was big and there was enough space, so why not?

And besides hide-and-seek meant exercise _and_ strategy, so it seemed like a win-win situation.

“Seokminnie, what do you think?” Soonyoung asked, just to be sure, he really didn’t want them to fight today, so he wanted to make sure that they agreed on this at least.

“I’d like that.” The ten year old said, smiling brightly.

Soonyoung doubted that he’d ever disagree, but… they seemed excited and Soonyoung had a good feeling about this.

“Okay then, go on.” He ushered them upstairs, as the boys giggled, the sound sounding like music to his ears.

He was so glad they were good friends now.

Now he only needed to worry about dinner.

He headed to the kitchen, thinking about all the ingredients he was about to use, he was pretty sure he had them all, and the meat was also—

“Uncle, can I have this?” Chan asked, innocent eyes looking up at Soonyoung as he held Jihoon’s favorite snack in his hands.

He hadn’t noticed that the boy had stayed behind, stalling as he found the candies.

Jihoon kept leaving those sugary treats everywhere around the house, just in case he needed a sugar boost.

Usually his partner was very protective of those, and Soonyoung very rarely took them (sometimes he did it just to piss him off)… but Jihoon would never say no to Chan, since he loved the little brat the most.

Although maybe _Soonyoung_ should say no, since it wasn’t healthy and they were about to eat in an hour or so…

“Just that one, baby.” He said with a small smile. “We’ll be having dinner soon.”

Chan blew him a kiss, _he was_ that _adorable, huh_ , and ran towards the living room, being the happiest now he had something sweet to eat.

“THANK YOU, UNCLE.”

He could faintly listen to Seungkwan and Seokmin’s laugh from upstairs, Chan running to meet them to start playing.

And Junnie and Wonwoo probably had already picked out a movie, and they were calmly watching it.

Yup, doing good.

Uncle Soonyoung was _that_ reliable, wasn’t he?

Everything was perfect…

Until it wasn’t.

***

“What do you want to see?”

Wonwoo hummed as he scrolled down the Netflix list, anime had sounded like a good suggestion, but now he thought that maybe they could see something they _weren’t_ allowed to see at home.

He had stopped seeing horror movies when he was little because he got too scared, but now he thought that he had outgrown those fears.

He wasn’t _that_ afraid of the dark, and he knew ghosts didn’t exist.

“Oh, Train to Busan,” Junhui pointed, leaning over Wonwoo’s shoulders to watch the list as well.

“There’ll be a sequel, I think, that’s why it’s trending now.” Wonwoo explained, licking his lips as he weighed on their options.

A zombie movie sounded fun.

Besides it wasn’t a horror movie per sé… it was kind of an action film, right?

That’s what he’d tell Jeonghan-appa if he got caught anyways.

“Have you seen it? Do you like it?” Wonwoo asked absently, as if he didn’t care either way, but truth was, he was actually excited to see the movie, and if they saw it together they could share the blame.

He had fewer opportunities like these… since he clearly didn’t have the same chance to see something scary with his own brothers, considering they were significantly younger.

“I haven’t.”

He didn’t really know if Junhui liked horror movies or not, since they always settled for anime when they were together.

“Appa wouldn’t let me see Train to Busan when it aired, because I was ten.” Wonwoo commented quietly, not really scrolling down anymore, the screen showing the summary of the movie instead.

“You want to watch this then?” Junhui asked, sounding slightly confused. Wonwoo wasn’t saying he didn’t want to, but sometimes Wonwoo did that, clearly _trying_ to tell him something, but not saying it out loud.

It often got Junhui really confused.

“I’m intrigued.” Wonwoo shrugged, focusing on the parent and the little girl on the screen, the trailer playing.

Everyone in school had watched it, it couldn’t so scary if every kid his age had seen it… maybe Jeonghan had been a little overprotective?

“So let’s watch it.” Junhui decided, sounding totally unbothered by the prospect of watching this movie.

Okay… if Junhui said so…

He pressed play.

***

“It’ll work.”

“Will it work?”

“It will.”

“I don’t know if—”

“It _will_.” Seungkwan said, with enough resolve to convince Seokmin.

Seokmin nodded, a smile forming on his lips.

“Okay, let’s do it.”

 _It_ being a thing that Seungkwan had seen on Youtube, which seemed like a pretty cool idea! It involved finding a pillow and then sliding down the stairs!

Which seemed fun and safe and mostly _fun_ and this house had the biggest stair of them all, so of course it’d work if they tried.

Besides, hide-and-seek had been fun but only for twenty minutes and this new game certainly sounded a lot funnier.

Which was _why_ , Seungkwan had been convincing Seokmin, and he thought he had done a pretty good job at it.

“I wanna do it.” A voice chirped from the doorway and Seungkwan remembered that of course Chan would want to participate as well…

He was sure that just a moment ago, his baby brother had been eating snacks downstairs, watching TV…

“Not you, Channie, you’re too little.” Seungkwan said immediately.

“I’m not little.” Chan pouted. “I’m big, I wanna play.”

“Your face is all sticky,” Seungkwan chastised, licking his thumb to clean the corner of Chan’s mouth, just as Seungcheol would do. “What did you eat?”

He seemed… more excited than usual, and Seungkwan thought it might have to do with the sugar, since he hardly ate anything sweet.

“ _Hyung_ ,” Chan whined, pushing him away. “ _Stoooooop_.”

“Such a messy kid,” Seungkwan added, clicking his tongue, his tone _very_ similar to Jeonghan’s, if you asked Seokmin.

“But I want to do it.” Chan insisted, eyes glazing over, as he looked at them.

Seungkwan crossed his arms against his chest.

No way he’d let Chan do it, what if he got hurt?

“Anyway, so as I was saying, you take the pillow.” He instructed, pointing to Seokmin.

“Hyung! I wanna play, please, please, _please_?” Chan interrupted, once again and Seungkwan considered.

“What if you fall though…”

“I think it’ll be more difficult for him to fall, since he’s little and the pillow is bigger.” Seokmin suggested.

“But… wouldn’t it help if he were heavier? So he’d be able to break the fall…” Seungkwan considered, humming in thought.

Neither of them seemed to know which was the best option.

“I won’t fall!” Chan insisted once again, and Seungkwan considered, maybe he should ask Wonwoo-hyung… he could always tell between safe fun and dangerous fun…

But he was currently watching a movie and he didn’t want to interrupt.

“I don’t know, Channie…”

“But I want to do it.” Chan repeated, voice wavering. “I WANT TO, HYUNG, PLEASE.”

Seokmin and Seungkwan exchanged looks, Chan waiting with an excited expression on his face.

Well…

***

Soonyoung was sure it had been a second, it couldn’t have been longer than that.

Just _one_ second he turned, to make sure the vegetables weren’t burning and then he heard the loud _thump_ , causing him to turn back into the direction of the living room.

Enough to catch the sight of Chan falling face first on the hardwood floor.

 _Shit_.

Suddenly Seokmin and Seungkwan’s laugh had subdued, and Soonyoung couldn’t even hear the sizzling of the frying pan anymore.

 _Suddenly_ , silence fell in the room and Soonyoung’s heart picked up speed.

 _Suddenly_ , Soonyoung noticed that the kids had been playing in the stairs, and Chan had fallen _full force_ , _on_ his baby face, _on_ the hardwood floor.

_Shit shit shit shit shit, goddamn it._

Chan was unmoving, and that unnerved Soonyoung the most, he couldn’t even _breathe_ as he stepped closer to him.

What if he was seriously injured? What if he was unconscious? What if he needed to do the Heimlich maneuver? He didn’t know _how_ to do that one, he hadn’t paid attention in class—

Then, before he could touch the boy, Chan’s arms moved and he slowly pulled himself up, sitting on the floor with a small stunned expression.

Soonyoung almost sighed in relief when he placed his hands on his nephew’s cheeks and checked.

Still one nose, two eyes, two ears, no blood, okay, no redness or anything—

Then Chan bolted over, cheeks puffing as if he were about to puke, and then he _spit_ on the floor.

And there it was.

Soonyoung’s cause of death.

A tooth.

A milk tooth, on his shiny hardwood floor.

“Oh my god,” Seokmin said, from somewhere around the living room area, but Soonyoung could only hold on Chan’s cheeks, heart threatening to burst from his chest.

He’d die.

His life ended today.

“Oh my god.” Seungkwan repeated.

Chan looked between all of them, blinking in confusion at all their stunned expressions.

He didn’t look like he was in any pain, not at all, but then he met eyes with Soonyoung and he let out a soft _hehe_ and... the _smallest_ trickle of blood stained his lower lip and chin.

Soonyoung waited only a second.

Then all hell broke loose.

Seokmin started _crying_ and then Seungkwan cried because he couldn’t bear to see his cousin so distressed, then _Chan_ started crying because all the fuss was scaring him off.

Soonyoung only managed to pick Chan up and reach out to pat the other kids’ heads, assuring them that it was okay.

“Un—Uncle, am I—I going to die?” Chan wailed, his little fists holding onto Soonyoung’s shirt as he pulled him as close as he could.

“Oh, baby, no, I could never let you die.” Soonyoung assured him, voice only straining a little.

He was doing _fine_ a moment ago, how could everything go to hell _that_ quickly?

He might have been pushing his luck when he had thought everything would be okay…

“Is he going to stay like that forever?” Seokmin asked from his side and it broke Soonyoung’s heart how _sad_ his boy looked, so he quickly reached out to pat his head, eyes shifting from Seokmin to Seungkwan.

“Is it our fault? We were playing and we—we’re really sorry, Channie.” Seungkwan whispered, eyes welling up with tears.

Oh, no, no, no, no more crying, _please_.

Soonyoung didn’t think he could handle it.

“Oh, no, boys. It’s okay, accidents happen, I shouldn’t have let you guys out of my sight.”

“Channie, does it hurt?” Seungkwan asked, moving from one side to another, to look into Chan’s face. It wouldn’t work though, since the boy was clinging to Soonyoung, burying his head on his shoulder. “Open your mouth.”

“Channie, we’re so sorry,” Seokmin insisted, rubbing Chan’s back up and down as he wept. “Appa, is he going to be okay?” He tugged on Soonyoung’s shirt now.

He pressed a kiss on the top of Chan’s head and frantically looked around, sighing when he caught sight of his phone, lying on the kitchen table.

He needed help, this was harder than he had thought, he couldn’t possibly-

“Um, I’m going to call Uncle Jihoonie, okay?” Soonyoung said, his voice straining again as he leaned down (with a crying Chan on his arms) to pick up his phone.

Seungkwan wasn’t crying that much anymore, instead cleaning Seokmin’s cheeks with his thumb.

Soonyoung would coo at the action, if he weren’t so worried about a _permanent_ injury on Chan’s mouth.

Oh God, he had fucked up.

He had fucked up bad.

He pressed Jihoon’s contact and placed his phone between his ear and shoulder.

“He’ll help _and_ most importantly, he won’t freak out.”

***

“YOU DID _WHAT?_ ”

Soonyoung’s cheeks got a little red because of embarrassment.

It had been… what? An hour since he called to say that he’d be okay with the kids and now…

“... might have let them out of my sight for only a few seconds and then Chan’s tooth was on the floor.”

“How did the tooth make it to the floor, Soonyoung,” Jihoon asked, patiently, and Soonyoung could already picture him, his head resting on his hand, leaning on his desk with a tired expression, being so _done_ with him.

“Well, Seokminnie and Seungkwannie watched this trick on Youtube and—”

“Soonyoung.” Jihoon started, a mix between a scowl and a sigh.

“Okay _, I know_ , I fu—messed up.” Soonyoung said, through his teeth. “I… I messed up, I just wanted to call, because you go to a great orthodontist.”

His partner sounded like he wanted to nag at him a bit more, but then he settled with _another_ sigh.

“Probably won’t do, you need a child orthodontist,” He explained.

Ah, right, that should have been obvious, but it hadn’t crossed Soonyoung’s mind at all.

That’s why they were a great team though! Because Jihoon would have helped if he were here, he would have known what to do right away.

“Soonyoung.”

He hated his partner's tone already.

“Yeah?”

It just didn't sound— 

“Are you watching the kids right now?”

 _Yes_ , he was. 

Seungkwan and Seokmin looked a bit calmer, just talking to each other in the couch, and Chan was still firmly planted on his lap, hugging him tight.

“Yeah, why—”

“You should remember the kids faces,” Jihoon warned.

Soonyoung winced, knowing what was coming.

“Because it’ll be the last time you’ll see them.”

***

With Chan strapped safely on the car seat and both Seungkwan and Seokmin _not_ crying anymore, Soonyoung was able to breathe.

There was no need to fuss, just a fallen tooth, surely Soonyoung had lost a few in the process of teething and he was totally fine!

Nothing to worry about!

Kids got hurt like this all the time!

Only a milk tooth, not like a _real_ tooth, so…

So he drove to the clinic (at a safe speed), just as he had discussed with Jihoon.

He was sure he’d get to the clinic and the orthodontist would tell him that he was exaggerating!

He could totally redeem himself!

He wasn't _that_ bad of an uncle.

***

“Why is there so much silence?”

Wonwoo stood in the middle of the living room, arms crossed against his chest as he looked around.

“I think Uncle Soonyoung left? With the kids?”

But where to? And why didn’t they tell them?

That was definitely weird.

“Maybe the zombies—”

“ _Please_ don’t—”

“... are around town. That’s how the movie started,” Junhui assured and Wonwoo’s heart skipped a beat, his cousin wouldn’t scare him on purpose, he just said whatever that came into his mind…

Which meant that Junhui did actually believe that.

“When the little girl was in the car and then she saw something—”

“Jun, _stop_ ,” Wonwoo begged and it made his cousin stop talking.

Should they call Uncle Soonyoung?

Maybe they had gone to eat dinner… but why didn’t they take them?

Still… that was only at the back of his mind though, he was more worried about the zombies.

And evil people on the train.

Why were people so _mean_? The father and the girl would have been safe if it weren’t for that evil—

“Sorry. I think I’m talking because I’m scared.” Junhui bluntly admitted and it interrupted Wonwoo’s thoughts.

Junhui had gotten scared.

Because of the movie.

Wonwoo should feel responsible for that one.

Junhui was older, but Wonwoo had always thought that he was more mature, and that he was in charge if any of the adults weren’t around.

He wished he could comfort him, but he wasn’t very good at that.

“I’m scared too.” Wonwoo admitted quietly, because that helped. Seungcheol and Jeonghan did that with him sometimes, it made him feel validated.

Silence hung between them, as they stood there.

An empty house at night was suddenly scary if you had just watched a horror movie.

They shouldn’t have watched that, Wonwoo knew that Seungcheol and Jeonghan would have never _ever_ let him see that movie at home.

It had been a mistake and he felt bad for Uncle Minghao and Uncle Mingyu… he felt he had betrayed them somehow, by not taking good care of Junnie.

“I really need to pee.”

Wonwoo’s cheeks reddened, Junhui wasn’t suggesting anything by that but…

“And?”

Surely he didn’t mean…

“I don’t want to be alone right now.” Junhui whispered.

“I’m not about to go with you to the bathroom, I have boundaries!” _Sure_ , one thing was feeling bad and responsible of this, but another thing altogether was to join his thirteen year old cousin to the bathroom, that’d be so embarrassing.

If anyone found out he’d never hear the end of it.

“Then… Are you going to leave me alone?”

Wonwoo waited.

Three full seconds.

Answering that meant… he didn’t really want Junhui to be scared.

“Then you want me to join you?” Wonwoo asked, cheeks getting warmer, suddenly self conscious at how _stupid_ they were being.

Zombies _weren’t_ real.

He was thirteen, he knew.

“... no.”

Both of them stood in silence, there wasn’t any noise coming from outside, not cars passing by or music from the neighbours…

It was scary, in a way, Wonwoo wished it could be a little louder.

With the sun setting and the darkness filling up the place, Wonwoo would (for once) wished that this house ( _yes_ , Uncle Soonyoung’s house) would be a little more lively.

That’d be swell.

Noise would be swell, _adults_ being here would be swell, just… any adult would do, and Wonwoo resisted the urge to call Seungcheol and Jeonghan only because he didn’t want to embarrass himself any further in front of Junhui.

He wasn’t a baby, _and_ it was only a horror movie.

“Um,” He started, voice rough from being unused for a while. “How about if we… turn on all the lights? That’d… be better.”

Junhui nodded.

“And… um, about the bathroom, if you really need to go, I can, uh, wait for you outside.”

He had done that for Seungkwan or Chan sometimes, when they were out for vacations and they were too scared to go on their own.

“Okay!” Junhui agreed, more cheerfully this time, Wonwoo turned to him, smiling.

All lights on, it’d be better, it’d look less scary.

Then they’d wait for Uncle Soonyoung to come back.

Easy peasy.

Wonwoo was feeling better already.

Zombies being real? _pfff_ , of course not.

“... can we hold hands?”

Wonwoo took a deep steadying breath.

Had Junhui actually said that out loud?

They were alone and no one would know anyways… besides it wasn’t like they hadn’t done that before.

 _And_ he was the most responsible and reliable between the two.

He didn’t reply, but he extended his hand towards his cousin.

No one had to know.

***

“What did they say?”

Soonyoung sighed, eyes focusing on the road, back to the house.

“The orthodontist said it should be fine, his permanent tooth was growing anyway, so this just made… the process a little quicker.”

He still felt bad about the whole ordeal, even if it hadn’t been serious.

At least Seokmin and Seungkwan had recovered from the shock and were happily eating ice cream on the backseat (thing that Soonyoung would allow only for today) and as Chan napped on his car seat.

“How is he?” Jihoon asked, humming in thought.

“Good, he cried, but only because _we_ fussed, he wasn’t in any pain.” Soonyoung’s eyes traveled to the youngest, curling on himself as he slept.

Soonyoung had draped his jacket over him, so he wouldn’t get cold and if it weren’t for the chaos, he’d find it the most adorable sight.

Was he still Chan’s favorite uncle after today?

He didn’t think so.

And he was sure he wasn’t Jeonghan’s favorite dongsaeng anymore…

When he heard about what happened with Channie…

“You forgot two kids at home.”

 _Ah_ , and that too.

“Yeah, I know,” He admitted, trying not to wince. He had realized when they made it to the clinic, and even though he had frantically called to ask if they were okay, and they were, he _actually_ forgot about them so… that wasn’t very nice. “I’m the worst.”

Usually Wonwoo and Jun were so quiet in the car, and Soonyoung had been worried about Chan not to be crying and Seokmin and Seungkwan not to blame themselves, to remember the kids at home…

At least right now Jihoon had already arrived and they weren’t all by themselves.

Junhui and Wonwoo were big and they could definitely take good care of each other, but still.

“Not my brightest day.” Soonyoung admitted, with a sigh.

He wasn’t deterred about babysitting or about raising Seokmin, but… but it proved that maybe this was harder than he thought.

“Even you can have a bad day.” Jihoon offered and it warmed Soonyoung’s heart. Jihoon wasn’t very cheesy, he wasn’t, at all, but now… Soonyoung really needed to hear it.

“Thank you, Jihoonie.”

He was already feeling a little better, he was less worried, Jeonghan and Seungcheol wouldn’t understand, Chan wasn’t crying anymore… and Seungkwan and Seokmin were happy.

 _And_ Wonwoo and Junhui watched a movie without interruptions…

It wasn’t the worst day in history.

“Drive safe, will you?” Jihoon’s soft voice pulled him out of his thoughts, and he smiled warmly, happy to be coming back home.

To Jihoon, to Seokmin, to his family.

“Will do, jagiya.”

***

At the first sound of a car pulling over, Soonyoung had already opened the door, as Jihoon approached to the entry, with a sleeping Chan on his arms.

“Hi, hyung!” Soonyoung stood, waving at Jeonghan and Seungcheol walking towards them.

They looked good, like they always did whenever they wanted to show off their relationship.

“Had fun in your date? You should really go out more.” Soonyoung said quickly, not even waiting for them to reply.

“We did, actually the—” Seungcheol started, with an enthusiastic tone.

“Anyways, Channie’s asleep, so you should take him home soon so he can get proper rest.” He pointed immediately.

At his side, Jihoon let out a sigh.

His partner was _that_ terrible at lying, huh?

“Ah, thank you, Soonyoungie,” Jeonghan frowned a bit at the weird tone of voice Soonyoung was using, he was talking… unusually fast, even for him. “Was he good? Did you have any—”

“Of course not!” Soonyoung interrupted again, and Jihoon slowly passed Chan over to Seungcheol, the kid didn’t even stir, just cuddled closer to his dad. “He was an absolute angel, there you go. Better not wake him up, he looked tired.”

Jeonghan and Seungcheol exchanged confused looks, but didn’t comment any further.

“Seungkwannie, Wonwoo-yah!” Soonyoung called. “Guys, they’re here to pick you up.”

Only a few seconds passed, and the kids were already running towards the entrance, hugging Jeonghan and Seungcheol.

Between all the greetings, Seokmin appeared at his side, and Soonyoung kissed the top of his head, gently rubbing his arm up and down.

He loved his son and he hoped he hadn’t set a bad example with how he acted today…

“Appa, can I stay with hyung, please please _please_ ?” Seungkwan asked, interrupting Soonyoung’s thoughts. “We wanted to have a sleepover because there’s no school tomorrow, and I did _all_ my homework already and—”

Jeonghan reached out to ruffle Seungkwan’s hair, smiling fondly at him.

Surely the adults shared the same thoughts about Seungkwan and Seokmin.

After the whole ordeal at the beginning of the kids’ relationship, months had passed and now the kids got a lot pretty well, they even seemed like best friends and they wouldn’t deny them an opportunity to spend the time together.

They’d rather for them to get along _too much_ other than them being wary and jealous of each other every day of their lives.

Jeonghan and Seungcheol exchanged another look and they nodded.

“Of course baby,” Jeonghan conceded. “If Uncle Jihoon and Uncle Soonyoung are okay with it.”

“No problem.” Jihoon said, since Soonyoung was being too weird to answer to this conversation like a normal person.

Sometimes he wondered why did he decide to be with Soonyoung again.

“Then we’ll see you tomorrow, baby. Have fun with hyung.” Jeonghan pressed a kiss on top of each kids’ heads to say goodbye, and Seungcheol made sure that Chan was secure on his lap as he reached out to Wonwoo.

His son had been so silent, which wasn’t weird, but he seemed a bit… off?

“Okay then, we’re off now. Thank you again for taking care of them.” Seungcheol commented, reaching out to squeeze Wonwoo’s shoulder.

When he did though, the kid immediately flinched, pulling himself away from his dad, just until he managed to notice it was Seungcheol.

“Ah, sorry, bud.” Seungcheol said, frowning when he noticed how spooked the boy seemed. Like he had just seen a ghost. “I didn’t mean to scare you, are you okay?”

Wonwoo parted his lips, eyes shifting from Junhui, to the floor and to _everywhere_ but him.

“Um, yes…” He said, nodding. “ _Yes_ , of course, appa.”

Wonwoo held Seungcheol’s sleeve, leaning on his shoulder as he left the house towards the car.

They all waved goodbye one last time, as Soonyoung (for some reason), sighed loudly in relief.

Wonwoo’s neck was prickling though, so he turned one last time, his eyes meeting Junhui’s.

“Are you going to be okay?” Junhui mouthed.

“I don’t know!” Wonwoo mouthed back, with a scandalised expression.

And it was the last thing they saw of each other.

Seeing horror movies with your cousin?

Never again.

How would he _ever_ sleep on his own from now on?

***

“Is it okay to lie?”

The question came just after Seungkwan went upstairs to make sure he had pyjamas for today’s sleepover and before Minghao and Mingyu came to pick up Junhui.

(The thirteen year old was sitting on the sofa, with a weird expression on his face.)

Of course Seokmin was curious about them lying.

They shouldn’t have.

Soonyoung shouldn’t have, but at the same time… It was like one am, and he hadn’t wanted to worry them.

It wasn’t like they wouldn’t notice either… Soonyoung just wanted to wait a bit more to tell them.

And maybe talk it over the phone? Because he was only a little scared of Jeonghan and Seungcheol’s (especially Jeonghan’s) reaction.

Jihoon directed a glare towards Soonyoung, _look what you got us into,_ but he sighed defeatedly, kneeling a bit to meet Seokmin’s curious eyes.

“No,” He said firmly, at his side, Soonyoung straightened his posture. “Sometimes people lie when they’re scared or worried, but it’s always better to tell the truth.”

“Ah,” Seokmin nodded, sounding convinced.

Jihoon didn’t doubt that if he had any more doubts he’d ask, he was a smart kid, he had good instincts.

But sometimes he was too pure for this world and Jihoon worried about _that_.

“Which is _why_ Soonyoung will call Jeonghan tomorrow to explain everything that happened.”

“But—”

“First thing in the morning.”

Soonyoung sighed, no point in arguing with his partner in front of their kid.

Besides, Jihoon was right anyway.

He had been defeated, the universe had proved him wrong, he wasn’t a good babysitter.

“Yes,” He said tiredly, and Seokmin smiled at him. “First thing in the morning.”

***

“Don’t be too hard on yourself.”

Soonyoung looked up, eyes leaving his phone screen to focus on his partner, standing on the doorway.

He wasn’t being hard on himself… he just… messed everything up and even though nothing serious had happened, he still worried.

He’d do anything for those kids and he hoped that Jeonghan, Seungcheol, Minghao and Mingyu knew that…

Even more importantly, that Jihoon knew that, since they were now raising a kid together.

Jihoon took a deep breath, at the lack of response, and closed the door behind him. Slowly and patiently he went around the room, hanging his jacket on the closet and throwing his phone on the bed.

He sat next to Soonyoung and just _then_ , his partner looked up at him.

“Are they asleep?”

Jihoon snorted.

That duo? Never.

“They’re playing Smash Bros, so no, they won’t be for a while.” He explained, extending his hand to caress Soonyoung’s ankle, the first bit of skin he could reach.

“I’m happy they’re getting along.” Soonyoung replied, sounding genuinely happy, but with a tired tone underneath.

Jihoon only hummed his agreement, giving him a small smile.

He only had to wait a bit more and then Soonyoung would talk.

And then he’d be ready to comfort.

“Do you…” _there it was_. “Think that Jeonghan and Seungcheol-hyung will be too mad at me?”

Jihoon pressed his thumb on Soonyoung’s skin and caressed, just until Soonyoung’s breath got a bit more even.

“I don’t know… Jeonghan-hyung seems like the kind of person who could just pretend to be mad, right?” Jihoon shrugged.

Chan was asleep when they left, but surely they must have noticed by now?

How couldn’t they?

“I don’t think he would, Jihoonie, I think he’ll be really mad.” At Soonyoung’s worried and remorseful tone, Jihoon couldn’t help but to get serious as well.

Soonyoung seemed genuinely scared and gloomy all of the sudden.

But Jihoon understood why.

He was confident most of the time, but… he got frustrated when things didn’t work out the way he wanted to.

And Jihoon wanted to ease his frustration a bit.

“He’ll probably be mad at first, but then when you tell him you took him to the doctor and it’s nothing serious, he’ll tell you _everyone have accidents_ , and things like that. Jeonghan can’t stay mad for too long.” He explained, because he really believed that.

Jeonghan loved all of them too much to hold grudges for too long.

(Besides, it was a bad example for the kids, and Jeonghan was a great parent above all things).

“I guess.”

“I know.” Jihoon assured him, hitting Soonyoung’s shoulder until he laid down ( _ow, ow, ow, couldn’t you be nicer?_ ). “Now go to sleep, you idiot, you worry too much.”

Soonyoung rolled his eyes, but complied, pulling Jihoon next to him, and kissing the top of his head.

“I might be an idiot.”

“ _P_ _lease_ don’t.” Jihoon winced, pushing at his chest.

“But I’m _your_ idiot.”

Ugh, scratch all he said, Soonyoung’d be fine, no need to mend his ego.

***

(" _Oh my god, did you hear that? I got a text. Hyung sent me a text, I can’t read it, the tension is killing me, I just can’t, he’ll—_ ”

_“Just give it to me.”_

_“I’m doomed, he’ll hate me, he’s—”_

_Jihoon’s eyes scanned the text with a deadpan expression and it only got Soonyoung even more anxious._

_“Let’s have a talk tomorrow.” Jihoon read. “That doesn’t sound too bad.”_

_Silence hung between them._

_“I’m doomed, aren’t I?”_

_“Yes, you are.”)_

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Jeonghannie.” 

“Mm?”

“Baby.”

“I’m trying to sleep, Cheol.” Jeonghan whined, cuddling closer to Seungcheol. “What is it?”

“Why won’t you just tell Soonyoung that Channie had a loose tooth? He must be really worried about how we’re going to react…”

“Ah,” Jeonghan hummed knowingly. “It’s a lesson.”

“Come on, Han, he—”

“Thinking I wouldn’t notice a missing tooth on my baby’s mouth _and_ for thinking that I’d be mad at him for an accident, I’d never, I’d trust any of my children to take care of my _actual_ children.”

Seungcheol sighed, rubbing his husband’s back up and down.

Stubborn little thing.

“Probably thought you’d get _really_ mad about it.”

There was a small pause, and it came to Seungcheol’s mind that _maybe_ Jeonghan was enjoying this a little… making Soonyoung squirm.

His husband could be really evil when he tried to make a point, although everyone still found him charming enough not to get mad at him because of it.

“I know, I’m just messing with him, it’s just until tomorrow, okay?”

Seungcheol took a deep breath, rolling his eyes, no pointing in arguing Jeonghan, he knew he’d lose anyway.

“Poor Soonyoungie,” He sighed. “ _Okay_ , but only until tomorrow.”

It was already late today anyways.

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Appa." 

“Mm?”

“Appa.”

“Wonnie?” Seungcheol asked, blinking away his sleep, it was mostly Chan who came at three in the morning to sleep with them… even Seungkwan, but Wonwoo… “Are you okay? Did you have a bad dream?”

The lights were off, so Seungcheol couldn't exactly make up the boy's expression. 

“Can I sleep here?”

Wonwoo sounded worried, and Seungcheol didn’t reply, just made room for him. The boy got under the covers quickly, seeking his warmth and comfort.

In his hazed state, Seungcheol thought that this didn’t look like a nightmare, because Wonwoo would never say anything when he had those, but… this blatant search for comfort could only mean something…

And if this something were true, then it meant that Soonyoung had something to do with it.

“Did you watch a horror movie, baby?”

Wonwoo’s breath hitched in his throat.

 _Gotcha_.

“... no.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!


	3. Seungcheol+family/Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seungcheol comes back to Daegu.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the past chapters it's okay if you aren't familiar with the series, but for this one I recommend you to read at least Everything is alright.  
> (Tags for this chapter: Implied Homophobia, Angst, Emotional hurt/comfort, Minor character death, grief/mourning).  
> Enjoy!

“ _Damn_.”

That was it, the last time, the tie wouldn’t just—

It didn’t work, maybe he should cancel this thing altogether, maybe he—

“Cheol.”

Jeonghan’s gentle voice pulled him out of his thoughts, and he turned towards the sound, letting go of his tie.

He didn’t know for how long he had been fiddling with the knot, but Jeonghan had gotten into the shower fifteen minutes ago, and now he stood in front of him, with damp hair and his slacks on.

“You never wear ties,” Jeonghan commented, as he walked towards him.

It wasn’t phrased as a question, because it wasn’t one, it was just an opening in case Seungcheol decided to talk about what was bothering him.

Jeonghan waited.

Seungcheol didn’t take it.

“You know we can still call it off. We don’t have to go anywhere you don’t want to.” Jeonghan whispered, standing in front of him and picking up where Seungcheol had left off.

Whenever he had to go to conferences for work, his boss had set up a strict formal dress code, so Jeonghan had learned how this went.

He took a few seconds, but then it was done, and Seungcheol still hadn’t spoken a word.

“We… _I_ have to, go.” Seungcheol said, albeit a little weakly.

Jeonghan slowly took his husband’s hands into his, kissing his knuckles as he placed them down, he was stiff, his movements awkward, as if he didn’t know what to do with his body.  

Seungcheol very rarely got like this.

It worried Jeonghan to no end, but if he started panicking now, he knew it would only worsen the situation.

“There you are.” Jeonghan said, with a content expression, as he smoothed out the nonexistent wrinkles on Seungcheol’s suit.

Since Seungcheol had gotten that call last week, he had been acting weird, closed off. The kids had picked it up, but Jeonghan had gently told them that he’d be back to normal in no time.

Seungcheol was grieving and Jeonghan couldn’t blame him.

It had been years since Seungcheol properly visited home.

He had gone last year, for his grandmother’s funeral (he had insisted in going alone, and Jeonghan had insisted in joining him, and then Seungcheol, the stubborn little thing, had gone all by himself).

(Then at three am, Seungcheol had called him as he wept and had _begged_ him to come… and three hours later, Jeonghan had left the kids in Soonyoung’s and he had gotten on a train to Daegu).

It had not been a nice experience, but funerals (and especially when you haven’t visited your house in _years_ ) hardly were.

Jeonghan wasn’t overly enthusiastic about going _again_ , but Seungcheol had _asked_ for them to be there to join him this time.

And how could Jeonghan ever deny him that?

He reached out to cup his husband’s cheek.

 _I_ have to go, he had said.

It made his stomach drop.

He just wanted to show him that no matter what, he’d be there, _of course_ he would.

They all would.

“ _We_ ’ll go.” Jeonghan assured him, and he could see how much Seungcheol struggled to look at him in the eye, trying to reassure him.

In the end, he finally looked up, and smiled a little.

It had an edge of sadness and wariness and exhaustion, but Jeonghan would take it.

It was genuine, and it was all that mattered.

***

Seoul station was particularly busy today.

It made sense, since it was a saturday and there was a lot of people traveling to their hometowns, making weekend trips, also there was a decent amount of tourists wandering around. 

“Okay, let’s round up here.” Jeonghan called, making a small motion with his hand. He felt like a primary teacher each time they traveled outside Seoul, but _hey_ , try to travel with three kids, a lot of bags, a prone-to-distractions husband and _then_ he’d take the criticism. “Appa will get the tickets.”

Chan was out of his sight in a second and Jeonghan turned to reach out for his hand, knowing he was about to trail off behind Seungcheol.

He was like a little duckling sometimes.

“ _Appa_ ,” He whined.

“Baby, he’ll be right back,” Jeonghan assured him, tugging Chan a little closer to his side.

The station was packed, and he didn’t want to risk losing him between the crowd. Their train departed in twenty and they didn’t have time for any inconvenience.

Also he didn’t want to add another reason for Cheol to stress about.

“It’s okay, Channie.” Wonwoo said, taking Chan’s free hand and squeezing gently, making sure that the youngest wouldn’t bolt off in Seungcheol’s direction again.

Jeonghan didn’t know what he’d do without him.

He was so thankful.

“So remember what we talked about back at home?”

All three boys nodded.

“We’re going to appa’s hometown.” Seungkwan helpfully provided.

“That’s right.”

Okay.

Not only that, they usually _didn’t_ go to Seungcheol’s hometown because his husband had stopped talking with his dad for about _six_ years now.

That was the hard part of the statement.

“Why are we only visiting now? Is it because it’s so far away?” Seungkwan asked, interrupting Jeonghan’s thoughts.

“Actually, it’s not that far, we’ve got five stops until Dongdae—”

“Wonnie, I’m sorry to interrupt.” Jeonghan said, looking at the two eldest apologetically. This wasn’t why he had started talking to them right now. “Boys, I understand you might have questions. This is just out of the blue, right?” Seungkwan nodded sheepishly, but Wonwoo didn’t.

Jeonghan always figured that the eldest already suspected the ill relationship Seungcheol had with his family.

Especially with his dad.

“I just wanted to remind you…. that this is a death anniversary. So let’s behave accordingly and be respectful, okay?” Jeonghan said, and then, just because he felt the need to reassure them, he added: “I trust you, boys.”

The kids had never even gone to a funeral before, none of their close friends had passed away.

Sure, some of them got ill from time to time.

But the most serious thing they had gotten was Soonyoung’s shoulder injury.

This was new territory for the kids.

Wonwoo and Seungkwan exchanged looks and nodded.

“We understand.”

Jeonghan allowed himself to breathe.

It wasn’t that he didn’t trust them, he did, they had raised them right, if you asked him. But still… there was a lot of new stuff, meeting their grandparents and the fact about the death anniversary, and Jeonghan still didn’t quite understand _why_ Seungcheol’s mother had called and insisted for Seungcheol to come with all the kids. 

Maybe she wanted to get to know them, but Jeonghan worried that things might not go as planned.

These circumstances weren’t ideal, far from it… and maybe—

“I’m tired,” Chan mumbled out, leaning on Jeonghan’s arm for support as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

Jeonghan cooed a little and bent down, deciding to pick him up instead.

“Sorry, baby, we had to take the first train to be there as early as we could.” He pressed a kiss against Chan’s temple, as the boy shuffled closer to him, hiding in the crook of his neck.

He shifted Chan on his hip and looked down to Seungkwan and Wonwoo.

They were the eldest, they surely understood more about what was going on.

“You have any questions?” Jeonghan asked, just in case. The two of them shook his head. “Okay, if you have any doubts, we can talk about them on the train.”

“We’re not coming back by plane, right?” Wonwoo asked, since he had probably heard Seungcheol mentioning that they’d only buy one way tickets.

Truth was they had no idea when they’d be back, since they didn’t know if things would work out after all…

If the atmosphere was a little tense, then they’d be out by tonight.

If everything worked out they might stay until tomorrow.

“We’re taking the KTX train, baby. No airplanes this time.” Jeonghan assured him and Wonwoo sighed out in relief.

Only a month or so had passed since they came back from Jeju and Wonwoo had hated flying.

Not only that, just as they had made it to the hotel room, he had also thrown up.

Jeonghan understood his worry.

Wonwoo still didn’t relax, he uneasily shifted his weight from one foot to another.

“You don’t have to worry, baby.” Jeonghan offered, hoping to ease him down. “We take trains all the time and they’re perfectly safe.”

“It’s because he watched Train to _mmph—_ ”

Jeonghan turned towards them with a curious look.

Wonwoo slowly let go of Seungkwan’s mouth.

“Seungkwannie,” Wonwoo said, his voice straining a little. He mimicked patting his brother’s cheek instead of covering his mouth. “Sit next to hyung, okay? I’ll keep you safe.”

Jeonghan gave them _another_ curious look and Seungkwan snapped out of his thoughts.

“Ah, right…” Seungkwan smiled, nodding.

Okay, that was definitely weird, Wonwoo had never been afraid of taking high-speed trains before, why today of all days was any different?

“Appa!” Chan called, bouncing up and down in Jeonghan’s hip as he noticed Seungcheol was finally heading their way.

Jeonghan almost panicked.

“Okay, boys. Hear me out. Last thing,” He said, eyes fixed on Seungcheol as he put the tickets into his pocket. “Appa was very close to his grandmother when he was a child, okay? This… this is really hard for him.”

Seungcheol made his way towards them, totally oblivious to the fact that Jeonghan was talking about him.

The kids were listening and he wished he didn’t sound so worried, but he was.

His heart hurt and he couldn’t imagine what Seungcheol was going through…

Death anniversaries were hard to deal with and Jeonghan knew that between all the chaos from last year, Seungcheol didn’t even manage to grieve at all.

“Let’s just give him all our support, okay?”  

***

“Appa,” Seungkwan said. “Why do people die?”

If there was a time to ask that, and Jeonghan was sure that at some point of his life there would be, it wasn’t certainly not this one.

They had come all the way to Daegu.

They took the KTX for _two_ whole hours and forty minutes more by _bus_.

And then they had walked fifteen minutes more.

And _then_ when they had _just_ knocked on Seungcheol’s childhood house’s door, _then_ Seungkwan had tugged on Jeonghan’s sleeve and asked.

_why do people die_

Good question, Jeonghan wished he could answer that.

Seungcheol had his hand on Wonwoo’s shoulder, but he looked like he hadn’t even been listening and both Wonwoo and Chan looked appalled by the whole idea of Seungkwan asking that.

“Well…” Jeonghan started, it was a tough question.

One he wasn’t sure how to answer right now.

“Seungkwannie, how about we settle down first and then I’ll answer that for you?” He said instead, he didn’t want to have this conversation right here, but that was _definitely_ a conversation that they should have.

Seungkwan blinked up at him, apparently noticing how tense the mood was, and he sheepishly nodded, his eyes traveling to Seungcheol instead.

He was squeezing Wonwoo’s shoulder, a little tight, as he stared at the door.

Jeonghan gulped as he heard shuffling behind the door and then the doorknob turned and…

A young woman appeared.

Jeonghan held his breath.

“Jooyeon.” Seungcheol acknowledged, with a little nod.

Seungcheol didn’t have any sisters, so Jeonghan figured that this was one of Seungcheol’s cousins.

She had clearly been crying just now, her cheeks were damp and rosy, her eyes red.

“What no Jooyeon-noona?” She asked, with a heartful laugh, when Seungcheol stayed in silence, she rolled her eyes.

She opened the door fully and just then Jeonghan (and all of them, really) managed to peek inside the house.

There were two more women and a man, that looked like Seungcheol’s age, probably his other cousins as well, and Seungcheol’s _mom_.

She was crying too.

Oh my.

Bad timing.

Jeonghan froze on his spot, not knowing how to react to this.

Should they just come inside, as if they hadn’t interrupted an emotional moment?

Maybe they could—

“Why are they crying, appa? They looked _so_ happy on the photos.” Chan practically _yelled_ , into the room full of mourners.

Great.

They had shown a few photos of Seungcheol’s relatives in the train, so they would get familiar with them, but…

“You shouldn’t be crying.” Chan added.

“ _Channie_.” Wonwoo said scandalized, his cheeks going red with embarrassment.

Jooyeon and all the people inside gave them a curious glance.

“Ah, baby, wait.” Jeonghan said, easily picking him up.

He was all about giving their kids their chance to speak up, but this was a death anniversary _and_ the first time he was seeing his in-laws in a long time.

This wasn’t the first impression he was aiming for, to be honest.

“Appa,” Chan whined when he was picked up, pushing at his chest.

He had been cranky since the train ride and now this, Jeonghan bowed a little at the crowd gathered in the living room.

He had totally missed his afternoon nap and _yes_ , Jeonghan knew that he was old enough not to be taking naps, but it was a weekend and he hadn’t “outgrown” (as someone once said) his sleep problems, so here they were.

Cut him some slack.

“Baby, how about we take some fresh air, huh?” Jeonghan offered, his voice straining a little as he tilted his head towards the door, signalling his husband he’d be outside.

Seungcheol wasn’t looking at him though, instead busy looking through his family, until another person joined the crowd in the living room.

(Jeonghan wasn’t even surprised, Chan could be really loud when he wanted to).

Now... it had been a couple of years, but Jeonghan could easily recognize the man as his father-in-law.

Seungcheol and his father held their gazes for a moment.

And no one said a word.

As if sensing the tension, he felt Seungkwan squeezing his hand tight, and Wonwoo looking up at him worriedly.

When Jeonghan thought Seungcheol was about to get inside, he turned, leaving the entry with the rest of them.

Right outside, Chan was effectively pushing at Jeonghan’s chest, whines turning into wails as he got more frustrated.

“Baby—”

“I want to leave now—” Chan started.

“Channie, I’m sorry,” This wasn’t what he expected when he told the boys to be respectful, and maybe he shouldn’t have reacted like this, but he had panicked, he knew how difficult this could be and—

Why wasn’t Seungcheol even saying anything?

He needed help with this, he had no idea what to say.

“Channie is right though, appa.” Seungkwan pouted, breaking the silence. Apparently Seungcheol’s family had come back inside, giving them space, which Jeonghan appreciated. “I thought they wouldn’t be that sad… Isn’t she in heaven? Isn’t that a happy place?”

Wonwoo looked at his brother in awe and Jeonghan felt a lump starting to form in his throat.

“If someone we love is gone… wouldn’t they want us to be happy? I think they’d want us to cherish the good memories instead of...” Seungkwan trailed off, unsure of himself.

Jeonghan’s eyes filled with tears.

He had been such an idiot just now.

Thinking that Seungkwan or Chan might not fully understand what was going on.

He was ready to reassure him, when Seungcheol beat him to it.

“Appa?” Seungkwan asked, and Seungcheol knelt to the ground and pulled the boy into a tight hug.

Jeonghan was sure that he felt the same, he was hit with a sudden wave of emotion towards their kids.

_let’s just give him all our support_

The boys _had_ been listening.

And they were so mature, this was just a reminder for him to trust them a bit more.

“Sorry about before, baby.” Jeonghan said, placing a kiss on the top of Chan's head and setting him down, so he could join the hug as well.

Seungcheol took a deep shaky breath and he pulled Chan in, without looking up from Seungkwan’s shoulder.

Jeonghan placed a hand on his chest, breathing in relief. He was worried that Seungcheol would be too stubborn not to crumble in front of the kids, but (as always) their babies had it all covered.

Apart from when he came to join him last year, Jeonghan didn’t remember a moment when Seungcheol had cried because of his grandmother.

It broke his heart to hear him cry, but he was so relieved that he was finally letting go.

He smiled at the scene and felt Wonwoo leaning his head on his shoulder.

Wonwoo had been quietly navigating around Seungcheol and Jeonghan knew it was just his way to show how much he cared and how little he wanted to disturb him.

Each one of their kids had their own ways to show affection, Chan was definitely more vocal about it, he was easy to give physical affection, Seungkwan was more sensitive and emphatic, willing to understand and talk, but Wonwoo was more about being there for you, even when you didn’t know you needed the company.

Jeonghan and Seungcheol loved them so much.

Jeonghan pulled Wonwoo close and pressed a kiss on the top of his head, letting him know he appreciated his efforts as well. Seungcheol’s breath got a little ragged, kissing Chan’s cheek and burying his head on Seungkwan’s shoulder, who kept patting his dad’s back with softs _it’s okay_.

Jeonghan knew reunions after a long time had passed were bound to get difficult, but he knew that as long as they’d stay together, they’d fine.

***

“Wonwoo, isn’t it?”

Wonwoo stilled, hand halfway to caress Chan’s hair.

After having just arrived at Seungcheol’s house, they had briefly said _hello_ (things were a bit awkward, but they had survived), left their bags and gone down to eat lunch somewhere else.

Wonwoo thought that maybe Seungcheol-appa wasn’t ready to face his parents just yet.

(Or maybe he didn’t want to speak to his cousins? Because when they came back, they were nowhere to be seen).

He slowly turned towards the voice.

Seungcheol’s mom.

His grandma.

“Seungcheollie has told me all about you.” She said, smiling at him and it briefly reminded Wonwoo of the same smile his other grandmother wore. He tried not to be nervous, weren’t grandmothers supposed to be nice? There was nothing to worry about. “You look more handsome in real life than in photos.”

Wonwoo didn’t really know what he was supposed to say to that, so he made sure that Chan was properly covered and tried not to blush.

Jeonghan, Seungcheol and Seungkwan were making dinner and he had just come to check if Channie was okay, but he never thought that his grandmother would just appear.

Right now.

When they were all alone.

Also, he didn’t know Seungcheol had sent her photos at all? Had Seungcheol been telling her things about them?

“That must be Chan.” She added, not bothered by the fact that Wonwoo hadn’t even replied to her first comment, nor the second one.

A very unique lady, if you asked Wonwoo.

He nodded again, focusing on his brother. Channie had fallen asleep right on the couch after they came home from lunch, so Seungcheol had carried him to his old bedroom, laying him down on the bed as they made dinner.

Wonwoo had wanted to check up on him… he never did expect his first proper encounter with his grandmother.

“It’s nap time,” He explained, since he found it immensely easier to talk about Chan than about himself right now. “He has trouble sleeping at night.”

He bit on his lower lip.

That was too much information, wasn’t it?

He shouldn’t have said that.

Actually he’d rather come back and stay with his parents.

Seungcheol’s dad had left the house as well… and Wonwoo briefly wondered where his grandpa had gone to…

“What do you like to do?” Wonwoo chewed on his lower lip, she really wouldn’t let this go, huh?

Okay, no need to be nervous.

This was Seungcheol’s mom.

“I like to read. And play videogames.” He said, getting up from the bed, so he wouldn’t jostle Chan too much. “And um, taking photos is nice too. Uncle Mingyu always lends me his camera…” He trailed off when he noticed her expression.

She looked confused, albeit a little taken aback.

 _Right_ , Wonwoo’s mind provided, _Appa has a hyung. He’s supposed to be our only Uncle._

“I mean **—** ”

“It’s okay.” She said, with a warm smile, and Wonwoo immediately relaxed. He didn’t know what he’d have to do if he had to deny that his uncles weren’t his “real” uncles.

That wouldn’t be correct.

It’s not like any of his Uncles would have to find out, but it still didn’t feel right...

“I should…” He started, looking between Chan and his grandma. He didn’t feel comfortable in this house and he thought this might get worse if he stayed all by himself. “Probably go now. I said I’d help set the table.”

Silence hung between them for a moment, and then his grandma just sighed.

It made something unpleasant twist in Wonwoo’s belly.

She had been trying to talk to him, but he hadn’t helped at all… maybe he should be nicer.

Be a little more talkative, this was Seungcheol’s mother after all.

“Um… I really liked your yard, halmeoni. It’s huge, back in Seoul we don’t have many plants.” He commented, but as soon as the words left his mouth, he noticed how _silly_ he actually sounded.

Plants, _really?_

Ugh, he should ask Seungkwan for some help in the small talk department.

He only got a curious look in response and his cheeks got all red again, _well done, Wonwoo_.

“I’m glad you like them,” She said, with a small smile and it managed to ease down Wonwoo’s anxieties.

She looked a lot like Seungcheol when she smiled and that was… comforting in a way.

“Our cat doesn’t seem to share your opinion. She keeps nibbling on the camellias.”  

Wait.

A cat?

Seungcheol-appa never said anything about a cat.

Maybe it was a new cat.

Oh my God, what if they had a _kitty_ around here somewhere and Wonwoo didn’t know?

“You _really_ have a cat?” Wonwoo asked, not being able to hide the excitement from his voice.  

He had always wanted one, but Seungcheol and Jeonghan had told him that it was too big of a responsibility when he was younger, and besides Channie was afraid of cats, so he had given up on the idea but…

“We do.” She said, sounding pleased. “How about we try and call her?”

Forget setting the table, this was much more interesting.

His grandma left for a moment, Wonwoo tried to hold in his excitement, and less than a minute later, she was back with a few cat toys.

Wonwoo’s eyes sparkled at that.

“Want to try?” She asked, offering him one of the teaser toys, it had a little bell on it, so Wonwoo was sure that that one would have to work out.

He nodded, taking it from her hand and gently testing it.

The sound filled the room, and Wonwoo quickly turned, afraid he might have woken Chan up, but no, his baby brother was still asleep.

Sounds of little paws came running down the hallway, until a _kitty_ appeared.

Woah, that had been fast.

She immediately threw herself towards the toy, baring her belly to play.

 _Oh my God_.

Wonwoo was endeared.

He immediately reached out towards it. “Ah, can I pet her?” He asked, halfway reaching towards the cat’s fur. He had almost forgotten his grandma was there too. “Please?” He added, sheepishly.

“Go ahead.” She smiled fondly, leaning on her elbow to watch him.

“She’s pretty.” Wonwoo said, slowly offering his hand. She was tiny, so she was probably a kitten after all.

And she was black and white as well, it was adorable.

The cat just looked at him for a lingering moment, then she started to heatbutt his hand.

Wonwoo giggled in delight.

“She’s called princess too.” He commented absently, caressing the cat’s belly with one hand and caressing the nametag, with the other one.

“You know what?” She asked, nudging his shoulder gently, and for once, Wonwoo didn’t mind the closeness. “I think she likes you.”

Wonwoo smiled a little, caressing the cat’s fur and then turning to look at his grandmother.

He hadn’t noticed, but… he actually felt more comfortable around her? And she had been nice too.

Wonwoo still didn’t know what had happened between Seungcheol and his parents, but… he didn’t think he’d mind if they came here a bit more often.

(And he didn’t mean it just for the cat).

***

Dinner had come in a rush, and Jeonghan was amazed by how _well_ everything had turned out so far.

Seungcheol’s mom had been nice and polite and for a second Jeonghan had almost forgotten that they were here for a death anniversary.

And about the elephant of the room, Seungcheol’s dad _still_ hadn’t made an appearance.

And Seungcheol hadn’t even asked about him anyways.

He had been here though… when they arrived, so maybe he had been avoiding him.

Jeonghan just hoped that when the meeting would occur, it’d be as peaceful as possible.

 _And_ that it wouldn’t happen in front of the kids.

The day was ending already, so maybe Jeonghan didn’t need to worry about that.

“Okay boys, there’s only two beds for you, I’m afraid.” Seungcheol’s mother started, and all the boys looked attentively at her. Seungcheol had been searching for enough blankets so the kids (Wonwoo) wouldn’t get cold during the night. “There’s a twin sized one, so I guess since you’re the eldest you can take that one, Wonwoo.”

“Ah, thank you, halmeoni.” Wonwoo said gently, with a shy smile. “But not just because I’m the eldest I deserve the bigger bed. We all deserve the same opportunity.”

There was a small pause and Wonwoo’s cheeks went red with embarrassment, looking at Jeonghan for encouragement.

 _Jeonghan_ , in the meantime, was trying not to cry.

His _baby_ , wasn’t he the best _hyung_ in the whole world? 

He was so proud, not just because they were giving the best impression ever, but also because if anyone has ever doubted that they were the sweetest and—

“Your kids are really mature.” Seungcheol’s mom said, sounding surprised.

 _Yes_ , they are, they’re the best kids ever.

(Not just because he and Seungcheol had raised them, of course).

Jeonghan finally snapped out of his proud daze and he only smiled, albeit a little sheepishly.

“Eomeonim, thank you, we—”

“We choose based on rock, paper, scissors.” Wonwoo said with a deadpan expression, not missing a beat.

“ _Yes,_ ” Chan provided from where he was sitting on the couch. “And I won.”

“No, you didn’t.” Seungkwan said, crossing his arms against his chest. “We said best of three.”

“Yes, and we’re down to the last round, so—”

“Don’t be such a sore loser.”

“I wasn’t, I only said—”

“ _Appa_.”

“Appa, tell hyung to—”

If Jeonghan’s cheeks were red before, they were even redder now.

“So much for mature kids.” Jeonghan said with a fond smile. Seungcheol’s mom let out a small laugh at the ridiculous situation and Jeonghan allowed himself to relax a little.

They were mature, but they were still children and Jeonghan knew better than to tell them to act like grown ups all the time.

They _weren’t_.

“Okay, finish your game, be nice to each other.”  He reminded them lazily, as he rolled his eyes. He placed a kiss on the top of Chan and Wonwoo’s heads and he sent the bickering Seungkwan upstairs with a pat on the bum. “Say goodnight to halmeoni.”

A chorus of _goodnight halmeoni!_ followed right away and Jeonghan smiled again.

These kids.

***

“Aw, you looked so cute in this, Cheollie. Why did you have a violin?”

Seungcheol chuckled, nudging him playfully on the side.

“You calling me cute, should I make a wish?”

“Whatever do you mean?” Jeonghan placed a hand against his chest, feigning offense. “I call you cute all the time.”

After putting the kids down to sleep, they had huddled together in the living room, watching old family photos.

Jeonghan had discovered a lot of new things so far.

Seungcheol had always had that pouty smile and those long eyelashes, and he was absolutely adorable as a baby.

And Jeonghan was tempted to take a few of these to add to their family photo albums back at home.

Maybe if he asked his mother-in-law…

“Ah, I really like this one.” Seungcheol commented sadly, pointing at one of the photos.

Jeonghan’s heart dropped as he looked down.

It was a picture of a maybe four year old Seungcheol, sitting on his grandmother’s lap as he munched some snacks.

His hands looked sticky and he looked a bit like a squirrel, since somebody had decided to take the photo mid-chew, but he looked adorable and they looked happy.

Jeonghan placed a hand on the small of Seungcheol’s back and rubbed up and down gently.

“I miss her.” Seungcheol whispered, and it effectively broke Jeonghan’s heart.

Of course he missed her, ever since he was eight, he had been practically raised by her, and Jeonghan remembered how much he loved her.

“I know, baby.” He said, leaning his head on Seungcheol’s shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

He didn’t know what else he was supposed to say.

Death was a difficult topic for him.

_sometimes people get very sick, sometimes accidents happen, when people are old, they just pass away_

He should have told Seungkwan that.

He probably would, tomorrow.

When they’d be back home in Seoul and things were back to normal.

He felt like he was walking on eggshells on this house and even though Seungcheol’s mom had been nice and welcoming, Jeonghan knew that the real reason why they hadn’t come back here was because of Seungcheol’s dad.

He was so immerse in the half hug he had with Seungcheol and on the sweet endearments he kept whispering against his hair, that he missed the sound of a door opening and closing.

“Hello, son.”

Jeonghan almost jumped from his seat, pulling back from Seungcheol, only to look up and find Seungcheol’s _dad_ staring down at him.

Shit.

“Jeonghan.”

“Mr. Choi.” He swallowed, squeezing Seungcheol’s shoulder before getting up and bowing.

He never even heard him come inside.

He was too distracted with…

Seungcheol slowly got up, not even bothering to clean up the tears on his cheeks and Jeonghan held his breath, just until they exchanged looks, just like they had done this morning.

Silence hung between them.

This would be the part where Jeonghan excused himself and went to his room, but he couldn’t bear to leave Seungcheol when he looked so broken.

So vulnerable.

He heard his husband sigh and then Seungcheol’s attention was back on him again.

“Don’t wait up, Han.” He said gently, placing an absent kiss on his forehead. Jeonghan’s stomach twisted with worry and he almost reached out to pull him back to the couch.

They were laughing, having a great time, and Seungcheol was _finally_ opening up.

He tried not to feel frustrated about it, but at the same time, he knew it couldn’t be helped.

Seungcheol knew that they should talk.

He had been waiting for it.

Apparently, his dad thought so too, because as soon as Seungcheol started walking towards the small terrace the house had, his father-in-law followed as well.

Jeonghan’s heart was hammering in his chest as he watched them disappear.

There was no more delaying this.

They’d either fix things between them, or they made it even worse.

Either way, things settled down today.

And Jeonghan could only pray that things would work out for Seungcheol.

He only wanted his peace of mind.

***

“I wasn’t avoiding you.”

Seungcheol snorted.

He actually did.

When he was younger, he had worried about not being disrespectful, all the time. But now… as he stared into his father’s eyes, he found he didn’t exactly regret it.

“You know, you could have fooled me.” He commented, knowing how petty he sounded.

His dad didn’t reply.

“I was only... “ He started, the grief of the conversation he had just had with Jeonghan a few minutes ago still hanging in the air. “I was only a broken, confused teenager, you could have supported me.”

He tried not to let his voice waver, but it had been a rollercoaster of emotions today and being in the same house where he rode a bike for the first time, where learned how to walk, where celebrated his first birthdays didn’t help at all.

He was exhausted and _sad_ and devastated.

And his dad being here was just a reminder of how little support he had given him.

“I loved you, I needed you and you weren’t—”

“Appa!”

Seungcheol didn’t even manage to turn towards the sound and then the door was wide open, a crying Chan rushing his way.

“Channie!” Jeonghan’s voice sounded apologetic already, and he chased down the five year old, but Chan was faster, already tugging at his shirt until Seungcheol recognized the plea and bent down, picking him up.

“Appa, I woke up—” He hiccuped, burying his head in Seungcheol’s chest. “And you we—weren’t there.”

“Channie, wait, come back here—” Jeonghan followed quickly, alarm sounding in his voice as he stood by Seungcheol, offering his arms for Chan. “Mr. Choi, I’m _so_ sorry. Channie, come here.”

“ _No_.”

“Baby, appa’s having an adult conversation, we’ve talked about this.”

Chan only tightened his hold on Seungcheol.

The tension in the room went unnoticed by the five year old, who kept clinging to Seungcheol.

“Baby, come with appa.” Jeonghan said, a little firmer.

“No!”

Seungcheol pressed a kiss against the boy’s hair. He must have just gotten out of bed, since he was still warm all over. He held him as close as he could, breathing in his scent.

He had forgotten how much that calmed him.

“I got you, baby.” Seungcheol whispered. “I’m right here.”

Jeonghan looked between them, clearly not knowing what to do.

There was something going on before Chan interrupted, but Seungcheol couldn’t exactly remember.

He was overwhelmed with Chan’s presence here and he wished he could only focus on that right now.

“Let him stay, Jeonghan.” His father's voice broke the silence and both Seungcheol and Jeonghan looked at each other questioningly.

Seungcheol knew a _talk_ between father and son was in order, and he was pretty sure no five year old should witness it.

But it wasn’t like he was about to let Chan go back to bed as he _cried_  for him.

It’s not like Jeonghan couldn’t offer the same comfort, but…

But maybe Seungcheol was actually glad for this interruption as well.

“I got him, Jeonghannie.” He said, smiling softly, managing to reassure his husband. “You can go back to bed, we’ll be there soon.”

Silence followed.

Jeonghan looked a bit hesitant to let go of the doorknob, but another nod from Seungcheol made him decide on it.

When they were all alone again, Seungcheol managed to pick up a jacket that was lying around there and draped it over Chan’s sleeping form.

It hadn’t even been five minutes and he was asleep again.

Seungcheol couldn’t be more glad.

He pressed a one last kiss on the top of his son’s head and sighed.

What was he even talking about?

How could he go back to it?

He had been blinded by rage and pain before, disappointment too.

But now. coming back here, after all these years…

It just reminded him how _tired_ he was of this.

Of trying to sneak in a few calls with his mother from time to time.

Or meeting her when she came to Seoul.

But being to afraid of introducing them to his kids in case they decided that they didn’t want to be part of his family.

The one he had built, that Jeonghan and he had built from scratch in Seoul.

He was terrified of telling his kids _meet grandma and grandpa_ and then never hearing of them again.

“You missed my wedding.” He commented, when silence had stretched long enough. “And when we brought Wonwoo home. And then Seungkwan, was I supposed to believe that you _wanted_ to be there for Chan?”

Jeonghan’s family had been there. Jihoon, Soonyoung, Mingyu and Minghao.

The only piece missing was  _his_ family and Seungcheol had tried to shrug it off, but it had hurt.

His friends had noticed, and Jeonghan had gave him a sad smile and—

His eyes stung with unshed tears at the memory.

“I wish that they knew you. I wish they could spend time with you.” He whispered, brokenly. “I’m not… I think I’m not even _mad_ anymore, I’m just sad.”

It was the first time he was properly admitting this and he thought that he’d want to get a reply… but maybe he just needed to say this out loud.

Then he could come back to Seoul, with his family, and move on.

He knew he wouldn’t get an apology.

And maybe he needed one, but he didn’t care.

This wasn’t about his dad, it was about _him_.

Seungcheol needed his own closure.

“Why did you come back now?” His dad’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts and he took a deep breath.

“Well, mom called and—”

“Why _now_?” He insisted.

And okay, maybe Seungcheol wasn’t _just_ listening to his mom.

“I don’t know. I’m not sure myself. For Christmas we came back to Seungkwannie’s hometown, to Jeju. Our eldest is turning fourteen and our youngest is entering school. I just…” He took a deep breath. “I guess it made sense to come back. Settle this.”

His dad didn’t ask _what_ and Seungcheol was glad.

He wasn’t sure he could explain even if someone asked.

“It’s all about origins and letting go and _grief_ , I guess.” He said, flashes of his grandmother inevitably crossing his mind.

He hugged Chan a little tighter.

“I expect my kids to learn and grow, become better persons.” He explained gently.

Seungkwan saying sorry to Seokmin.

Wonwoo’s _letting me become the best version of myself_.

Chan becoming more independent.

“And _I_ can’t stay a kid forever.”

***

Seungcheol loved the night sky.

It had always fascinated him, and one of the things he missed the most when he moved to Seoul, was the night sky.

You could barely see any stars there, but _here_.

He could clearly identify a few constellations, and it filled him with a sense of awe.

This had been his second time to come back home in what? Six years?

He had been so mad to come back that he had actually gone to the hospital to see his grandmother instead of to his own childhood house.

He wondered a lot of things.

Should he have come back sooner? Was he supposed to just accept that his family, especially his dad, didn’t just approve of the way he lived right now?

He wouldn’t change his husband and three kids for the world.

And if he needed to choose between his biological family and Jeonghan and the boys, he’d choose them in a heartbeat.

His mother had told him that his father had changed, that he accepted them now, but…

Could Seungcheol fully believe him?

He needed proofs, he just didn’t want to expose his kids to unhealthy familiar relationships…

His kids deserved better.

Even better.

Better than what _he_ got with his family.  

“You did that too.”

Seungcheol blinked up.

For a moment he had forgotten they were still here.

Chatting properly for once.

(Not that his dad was doing a lot of talking, but still).

“Sorry?”

“You liked falling asleep on our bed.” He explained. “You always came to our bed during the night, and you told me _just until I fall asleep_ , and when you did and I tried to take you back to your own bed, you’d wake up as I was about to put you down.”

Seungcheol parted his lips, heart warming with a sudden wave of awe towards him.

He didn’t remember that.

“You ended up sleeping in our bed until you were eight.” He commented, with a small, nostalgic smile and Seungcheol held his breath.

They were so close back then.

Maybe as close as Channie and he were now.

He didn’t like the comparison.

He didn’t want to end up like his father, making the wrong decisions and then not seeing his kid for years.

Seungcheol dreaded just to _think_ about it.

“Your kids…” His dad started. “When is the next birthday?”

“Uh…” Seungcheol took a moment, suddenly dumbfounded. “That’d be Channie’s, he’s turning six on February.”

A few seconds passed and Seungcheol considered coming back inside.

It must have been like two am already.

“I’ll be there.”

That was… more than he had hoped so, when he came back here.

He knew his mother had wanted to go to one of the kids’ birthdays, but in the end it hadn’t worked out.

And now knowing that his father was willing to come… maybe he had accepted him, _them_ , after all… maybe he had changed.

Seungcheol tried not to get too hopeful.

If there was the smallest chance that he hadn’t changed… then Seungcheol couldn’t risk it.

“Actually don’t.” He said, surprising himself at how mature and sure of himself sounded. His dad looked taken aback as well, but Seungcheol needed to do this. He needed to _say_ this. “If you’re coming back after all these years, I’ll need to know you’ll stay. So call them, visit from time to time. Then Jeonghan and I will decide if you can stay in their lives.”

Maybe that had been too harsh, too _raw,_  but—

“I promise.”

“ _No_ , you don’t need to promise anything.” Seungcheol said calmly. “We say we’re sorry not only through words, but also by actions.”

One lesson that was engraved on his kids’ minds and he was glad they had inforced.

He had also said everything he wanted to say, even if the outcome wasn’t what he’d expect.

It didn’t matter, he felt lighter, in a way he hadn’t felt in years.

And he thought that his father had the potential in him, to be more apologetic.

He just hoped that in time, he’d be.

He had been a good father after all, back then.

And Seungcheol _had_ learned almost everything from him.

Now he could just forget about what had happened with _him_ , but with his kids… if his father interacted with his kids, he’d be much more strict.

No one would hurt his family if he was there to prevent it.

Not even his own father.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me. It’s getting too cold and Channie needs to sleep in his bed.” He said, getting up and shifting Chan on his arms so he could get a proper hold on him.

As soon as he got a hold of the doorknob, his father’s words interrupted him.

“You’re a good dad, Seungcheol.”

Seungcheol didn’t turn right away, he just waited.

He thought he’d be happier to hear those words.

He often second guessed about his parenting skills, even though Jeonghan was always there to reassure…

Hearing this from his own father certainly helped him to put a few things into perspective.

Seungcheol turned, gently rubbing Chan’s back as he did so.

“I know,” He said, looking at him dead in the eye, because there was no point in lying about this. “You raised me.”

***

Jeonghan found himself unable to sleep.

Just a few meters away, Wonwoo and Seungkwan were already sleeping soundly and it must have been like one am and Seungcheol still hadn’t come back from talking with his dad.

He was worried.

No, scratch that, worried didn’t even managed to cover it.

He was afraid.

After all the years he had spent with Seungcheol, he had learned that Seungcheol was a vulnerable man, in many ways.

Amongst all things, just being in this room, filled with dinosaurs and soft toys, was just another reminder.

Seungcheol could be strong if he needed to be, and for that, Jeonghan was always thankful, but…

He was afraid that this might break him.

He couldn’t just bear to see him like this, it hurt him.

And he kept praying that the conversation could go well.

Jeonghan might have been just as exhausted as Seungcheol, because even though he wished he hadn’t dozed off, apparently he had, because next thing he knew, he felt a slight dip in the bed and he snapped back into attention.

The clock in the room read two and thirty six am.

It was Seungcheol.

He was silently navigating the bedroom, putting Chan down (next to a sleeping Seungkwan) and pressing a kiss on both of their heads.

Jeonghan’s heart skipped a beat.

“Seungcheol,” He asked, voice gentle since he didn’t want to wake up the kids. “Are you okay?”

As soon as his husband joined him in the bed, he reached out to caress his cheeks, a soft motion with both of his thumbs.

Up and down.

Seungcheol’s skin was warm, but it was also a bit damp.

Had he cried?

What if his father had said something?

What if he had hurt him with his words and Seungcheol couldn’t recover?

What if he had planted a seed on Seungcheol’s mind about his parenting skills?

He really did try to stop Chan from coming there, but…

He didn’t get a reply, but Seungcheol leaned in, warm breath tickling Jeonghan’s lips, and kissed him on the nose.

Jeonghan blushed bright red, hitting him on the chest, with a bit more force than he actually intended to.

“Ow,” Seungcheol whined, recoiling on himself for a second and then pulling Jeonghan even closer, cradling his head. “I’m okay.” He said, after what seemed like an eternity.

“You sure?” Jeonghan asked, voice rough as the first tendrils of sleep started to cloud his mind.

“I’m sure,” Seungcheol whispered, his grip on him strong, his voice sounding sure and _soft_ and even though it was dark, Jeonghan could still see his smile. “I love you,” He added, kissing the corner of his lips now.

Jeonghan smiled lazily.

Seungcheol was here, it was fine.

Everything would be okay.

“I love you too.”

***

Jeonghan woke up.

He wasn’t sure _what_ had woken him up, but as soon as he looked around the room, he noticed the rumpled sheets at his side.

It was past ten, how did he even manage to sleep that much?

He quickly put a hoodie over his pyjama top, following the noises coming from outside.

Where had the kids gone off to? And Seungcheol?

“And Channie scores!”

Loud cheering.

“We’ve got five minutes left, we can still win!”

Seungkwan’s voice.

“Cover for me!”

Wonwoo.

When Jeonghan finally located the source of the sound, he found Seungcheol picking up Chan to run towards the “football” field (Seungcheol’s backyard) and Seungkwan and Wonwoo laughing as they chased them.

“Appa, that isn’t even fair!”

Jeonghan smiled at the scene, leaning on the door frame to watch them for a moment.

He faintly remember this place, they had both met in Seoul when they were eight, but when they were teenagers, they had come here, and they had also played football, since Jeonghan used to be on the team.

He wondered if Seungcheol remembered, or if this was just a funny coincidence.

“Ah, Jeonghan-appa!” Seungkwan yelled, as soon as he noticed his presence. “Join our team!”

“Yes, appa, please!”

Seungcheol’s eyes met with his, and he gave him a mischievous glance.

Oh, it was on.

If Seungcheol thought he could beat him in football, he was in for a surprise.

Luckily he had brought on his shoes, because as soon as he leaned down to put them on, he got even more cheering in response.

“You’re over, appa!”

“I’d like to see you three try!”

The ball rolled towards his direction and he easily picked it up.

All traces of the sad smile his husband had been wearing yesterday, were promptly gone by today and Jeonghan couldn’t be more glad.

Seungcheol would be fine.

And they'd all be there to support him if he wasn't.

(After Jeonghan beat his ass in football, of course). 


	4. Wonwoo+Junhui/Secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wonwoo and Junhui are definitely hiding something, but it might not be what everyone thinks it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags for this chapter: me attempting humor.

“I did something." 

Wonwoo tried not to worry, but when your cousin texted you before school started, and told you to meet him at the boys’ bathroom, specifying that _you should come alone_ , he should admit he got the _slightest_ bit worried.

“I thought you might have.” Wonwoo said, his voice straining a little as he stared at Junhui.

He looked fine.

Maybe a little more nervous than usual, a bit… twitchy, if you asked Wonwoo.

So Junhui didn’t need to say that he had done something, you could clearly see it.

Now Wonwoo didn’t know if he wanted to find out _what_ his cousin had done.

Wonwoo wasn’t even sure _why_ , but every time they got together something happened.

Like that time when they flooded Uncle Soonyoung’s kitchen, or that one time when Junhui almost broke his arm when he fell into the pool, or that food contest they made at home, where they tried to make the _spiciest_ ramyeon and Wonwoo ended up in the hosp—

“Meow.”

Wonwoo stared at Junhui, dead in the eye.

“What. Was. That.”

It couldn’t be.

“Nothing.”

Junhui couldn’t be that bold.

They were in school grounds, the teachers were everywhere, they could be found in any second now, how did he-

“Junnie.”

“Meow.”

He _was_ that bold, wasn’t he?

Wonwoo took a deep breath and he properly inspected Junhui’s uniform this time.

He was wearing the usual oversized jacket he wore when it got a bit cold in the mornings, but…

“Take that off.”

“I swear I’m—”

“Take that off.”

Silence hung between them, and Wonwoo was suddenly glad that at least Junhui had chosen this bathroom, it was secluded and no one would find them there if they were silent enough.

If Junhui was hiding a _kitten_ of all things there, Wonwoo would—

“I just… found him on the street. He was all alone and shivering. Clearly someone abandoned him! So I had to come back home and bring him here!”

_him_

Wonwoo only stared at him, until Junhui sighed, and slowly took off his jacket, revealing a sphere bag hanging from his shoulder, with a little ball of light brown fur inside.

That was _definitely_ -without a doubt- a kitten, but the other thing… it looked _a lot_ like…

“Oh my God, that’s Uncle Minghao’s Chanel bag.” Wonwoo said, horrified, placing a hand on his head.

He was _this_ close to start pulling off his hair.

If he thought that he couldn’t get any more surprises today, he had been _wrong_.

He was getting a headache already.

Not only Junhui had taken a stray kitten from the street, he had hid it in the most expensive accessory in Uncle Minghao’s closet (well, not the most, they had a lot of fancy stuff there) and he had _also_ taken him to school, was he crazy? Did he want to get them expelled?

“I think I’ll name him Whiskers, you know,” Junhui commented conversationally.

“ _Whiskers_.” Wonwoo repeated, first, that was such a common name, the kitten definitely deserved better, second— “Can he even breath in there?”

“Of course, I made a hole—”

“You made a _hole_ in Uncle Minghao’s Chanel bag?”

Junhui closed his mouth.

“Maybe more than one, I didn’t want him to drown—”

“You drown in water, you _suffocate_ when there’s lack of—” He groaned. “That doesn’t even matter right now. We’re in big trouble, you know?”

Oh God.

This was just bound to end in disaster.

Wonwoo went silent, maybe there could be a way out, maybe they could leave the little cat in a shelter.

He had always wanted a cat, and Junhui too, but this wasn’t the way.

He could already picture Jeonghan and Seungcheol saying something like _sorry, bud, you know he can’t stay at home._

“We.” Junhui said with a sly smile, interrupting Wonwoo’s thoughts.

 _That_ meant trouble, Wonwoo knew by now.

“What?”

“You said _we_ , so you’re in this with me.”

“Wait, I never said—”

“You just did.”

Wonwoo tried not to sigh.

He had said _we_ , Junhui was right.

And he was just the tiniest bit tempted to…

“Can I see him?” He asked, not being able to hide his excitement anymore. Truth was, he did love cats. Everyone knew, he had gone as a volunteer for cat shelters too, with Seungcheol-appa.

One time they tried to go with Channie too, but he got scared.

Junhui opened the bag and Wonwoo leaned in, slowly reaching out.

The kitten sniffed, letting out a small _meow_ , and then he extended his little paws curiously, aiming at Wonwoo’s fingers.

He almost _melted_.

“We’ve been over this already, so I don’t think they’ll let us keep him. So… I was thinking we could _hide_ him in our houses.” Junhui suggested and Wonwoo could feel that start of a headache coming back to him.

“You think that could work?” Wonwoo asked, pulling the kitten into his arms and smiling when he slumped against his chest.

 _Adorable_.

“Well, you’re the smart one, if anyone knows how to pull it off, it’s you.”

Wonwoo’s cheeks reddened, wondering if Junhui was really complimenting him to get his way, or because he really thought so.

Both options seemed plausible right now.

“You’re also smart.”

“And two heads work better than one.” Junhui added, with another one of _those_ smiles.

Wonwoo was doomed the moment he walked in, wasn’t he?

“Okay,” Wonwoo took a deep breath. They had Minhyun’s help, maybe he could cover them as they went back home and left the kitten there in the meantime… then during the afternoon, they had plenty of time to think how to hide him, because they’d be alone until either of their parents arrived… they could also buy food on the way back. He stared into Junhui’s eyes, expression going serious. “Here’s our plan.”

***

“Hyung! Come down. We’re going to be late for school.”

Wonwoo’s eyes snapped open.

 _Oh no_.

He had stayed up late last night because he was making sure that his room was kitten proof.

He had covered all of the surface of his bedroom with old newspapers, since they couldn’t possibly afford to buy litter and a box (although Wonwoo wasn’t sure that Whiskers knew how to use it anyway?).

But at least between his private bathroom and bedroom, the kitten had enough space not to get bored during the day.

And Wonwoo had suggested Junhui that they could play music during the night, just in case the cat would wake up and star meowing.

It had been two days and it had worked!

It also helped that Jeonghan had said _boys, give Wonwoo-hyung some privacy. remember to always knock_ , because now his door was closed all the time and nobody suspected a thing!

He only needed to make sure to be the last one to leave the house in the morning, when they were off to school, so none of his parents or brothers would come into the second floor and hear him.

“Hyung!” Seungkwan urged, from the other side of the door, and Wonwoo snapped out of his thoughts, picking up his bag and rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

Taking care of a baby was _hard_.

He had no idea how his parents did it with _three_ kids.

 _Whiskers_ , as Junhui had named him, had immediately taken his spot on the bed, cuddling in the still warm blankets.

Wonwoo never thought he’d feel envious of a cat.

He wanted to sleep in too!

Luckily tomorrow Junhui would come in and take him to his own house (he was so thankful that their houses were at walking distance, it made things immensely easier).

Then he’d be able to relax for a few days.

Right, he should leave now, he picked up his phone and checked Whiskers one last time, the tiny light brown kitten stared up at him with sleepy eyes and Wonwoo almost cooed out loud.

He wanted to keep him _forever_.

“I’m going to go now.” He whispered, to which the kitten replied _meow_.

Made sense.

Wonwoo looked around, he felt a little silly for doing this, but his grandmother’s words were suddenly at the back of his mind.

“Please don't eat my plant,” he added, he had worked very hard to keep the plant that Uncle Soonyoung had given him for his eight birthday and he didn’t want _Whiskers_ to eat it.

“Meow.”

“Yeah,” Wonwoo agreed, nodding to himself. “Be good while I’m gone, okay?”

***

“They’re not supposed to drink milk, I think.”

“But babies drink milk,” Junhui said, matter of factly.

Wonwoo only hummed at the screen, as Whiskers kept trying to climb his thigh. He absently caressed his head, eyes glued to the screen showing information about proper ways to feed a kitten (and more importantly what _not_ to give to a cat).

They couldn’t afford _special_ food, Wonwoo had used his savings to buy regular kitten food and it had worked so far.

And the kitten wasn’t _that_ young because he could eat it on his own too.

So maybe he was just small.

And _maybe_ they didn’t need the milk, because Whiskers had managed with kitten food and water just fine... for four days now.

“He must be… more than a month or two to be able to eat it.” Wonwoo said, as he read. They were at Junhui’s house today, he had said to his parents that they’d study (and they had, for like five minutes) and now they were seeing how to do this long term. “So at least we know how old he is.”

The music and the door-closed-policy worked better than expected so far.

Junhui leaned on his shoulder, eyes skimming the text in the screen.

“We should buy him a collar, he’d look cute with a little bell.”

“Yes, and we’d get caught in like five seconds. We’re lucky he’s actually silent, because—”

“Boys!”

That was Mingyu’s voice.

And that sounded close.

In a second Junhui had closed the laptop and Wonwoo had quickly thrown a nearby jacket over himself, managing to cover the kitten that was _between_ his crossed legs.

Damn.

The door was opened a moment after, and Mingyu greeted them with a smile.

“Dinner’s ready, so come down before it gets cold.” He said, looking at the two teenagers. Wonwoo went _very_ very still, heart beating overtime and cheeks burning.

They’d get caught.

Now.

There was no way that Uncle Mingyu wouldn’t notice—

“You guys okay?”

“Sure!”

“Of course!”

He could actually feel Whiskers trying to get out from his hiding spot and Wonwoo just prayed that Uncle Mingyu could just _leave_.

“Oh, okay,” Mingyu said, nodding to himself. “What were you guys watching?”

“Anime.”

“Movies.”

Wonwoo and Junhui both exchanged accusatory looks.

They really needed to learn how to lie.

Mingyu stared at them for a moment.

Wonwoo’s cheeks went even redder than before.

_Oh God, why._

“Right.”

That sounded fake even to his own ears.

Could this get even _more_ awkward?

“If you… I just—I’m going to go now.” Mingyu’s expression went weird and awkward for a moment. As if he were ashamed, but why would he... “Take your time with… whatever you were doing.” Mingyu added, clearly uncomfortable and eager to leave, and he waved a hand at them.

Ah, yes, it definitely could.

Then the door was closed.

Wonwoo only allowed himself to breathe after he stopped hearing Mingyu’s footsteps on the second floor.

That had been close, so _close_.

He took off the jacket, and _Whiskers_ finally climbed from his thigh to the other side of the bed, with an offended _meow_.

“Well, good thing he didn’t notice anything.” Junhui said optimistically, giving him thumbs up.

Wonwoo almost groaned.

“ _Really?_ ”

***

“ _Do you think the kids are hiding something_?”

“Mmm… What could they be hiding?”

“ _I_ _don’t know… just the other day, I went to Junnie’s room and they were… um, watching something in their computer. And it seemed suspicious.”_

“Suspicious.”

“ _Yeah, hyung, suspicious_.”

“As in… illegal-suspicious or worrying-suspicious or maybe normal for his age-suspicious?”

“...”

“What?”

“ _Hyung, I don’t even know what’s that supposed to mean.”_

“Fear no more, Mingyu.”

“ _Okay?_ ”

“I’ll set an informer.”

“... _Hyung, please don’t send Channie to find information for you_.”

“I never said it’d be Channie!”

“ _Is it Seungcheol-hyung then?_ ”

“... Maybe.”

“ _Well, let me know if you know anything_.”

“This is my last time helping you, Kim Mingyu.”

***

“Appa.”

Seungcheol absently looked up from his laptop, giving Wonwoo a small smile.

“Can… um, Junnie stay here today? We wanted to study together.” Wonwoo asked, knowing that Seungcheol wouldn’t say no.

He couldn’t believe that they had already survived for a week with this arrangement.

Kudos to him.

“Of course.” Seungcheol said immediately, hiding a yawn behind his sleeve, Wonwoo knew that his dad didn’t even have work to do, he was just waiting for Jeonghan to arrive from his own work.

And since Jeonghan always felt bad for keeping him up, Seungcheol always pretended like he was actually working on something…

Wonwoo found it kind of sweet.

“Does Uncle Minghao or Uncle Mingyu know?” Wonwoo shook his head. “Okay, I’ll let them know. Don’t stay up too late, okay?”

“We won’t.”

He was about to turn to leave, when something seemed to flash Seungcheol’s mind, his dad’s expression turning thoughtful instead.

“Actually, can we talk?” Seungcheol asked, patting the spot next to him in the couch.

Oh no.

This wasn’t good.

Not at all.

He knew it.

He had found out.

Wonwoo slowly sat down next to him, hands on his lap.

Okay, he’d say sorry for lying, but then he’d say that he really thought he deserved a cat, he had been doing well and Channie hadn’t cried with that _one_ cat video and-

“Is someone bothering you in school?” Wonwoo blinked his surprise.

 _Wait_ , what?

“Um… no.”

“Would you tell appa if they were?” Seungcheol asked again, and Wonwoo could finally read his dad’s expression.

He looked worried.

“How is it going with school? Everything okay with your friends?” He pushed a little further and Wonwoo rushed to reassure.

“No, Appa, everything’s okay. No one’s bothering me and… we’re okay.” He hadn’t fought with any of his friends. Why would his dad think that?

Or maybe…

Wonwoo tried not to show his panic, why was Seungcheol acting as if he knew… no, as if he _suspected_ something?

They had been so careful so far.

Or maybe he suspected _something_ and he didn’t know _what_?

“Everything’s okay, appa.” Wonwoo assured him again, trying a smile. He wasn’t used to lying (we’ve been hiding A CAT, for a whole WEEK now!), but he couldn’t spill the truth _now_ of all times, all the efforts they had put into this would have been for nothing.

Seungcheol looked unconvinced, but he patted his back anyway.

He knew better than to push, and Wonwoo was glad.

“Okay, if there’s anything wrong, you can talk to me.” Seungcheol added. “Goodnight, Wonnie.”

Wonwoo got up, heart thrumming in his chest, that had been _so_ close.

They had been so lucky so far.

He didn’t think they could keep this up much longer.

Something needed to be done.

“Night, Appa.”

***

 **Mingyu** **∞**

It’s two am.

 **Hao** **♡**

You know my phone has a clock, don’t you?

 **Mingyu** **∞**

There’s no need to be sarcastic. What I meant was, it’s two am, why is there music coming from Junnie’s room?

 **Hao** **♡**

I didn’t think you could hear it from our bedroom.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

How couldn’t I? It’s two am.

 **Hao** **♡**

I don’t know, he’s been doing it for the past few days. Said Wonwoo told him that it helped with concentration or something like that. He read an article.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

Oh… Wonwoo.

 **Hao** **♡**

Yeah, does it bother you? We can tell him to lower the volume tomorrow morning.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

No, it’s not that. I just… don’t you think like the boys are hiding something? They’re acting weird.

 **Hao** **♡**

What on earth could he be hiding?

 **Mingyu** **∞**

I don’t know, but if they’re here, they stay locked in Junnie’s room all the time. And Jeonghan told me that it’s the same when they’re there.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

And they’ve got like music playing all day long. It’s like they’re muffling… something.

 **Hao** **♡**

…. so? They’re teenagers, Gyu. They probably just want some privacy.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

I don’t know, I’ve got a weird feeling about it, I guess. Must be imagining things.

 **Hao** **♡**

Wouldn’t be the first time.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

Rude.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

Stop working and come to bed.

 **Hao** **♡**

Maybe stop texting me from inside the house.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

Hao.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

Hao.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

Hao.

 **Hao** **♡**

.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

How could you send me that? I’m your boyfriend.

 **Hao** **♡**

.♡

 **Mingyu** **∞**

…

 **Mingyu** **∞**

Are you almost done?

 **Hao** **♡**

Half an hour.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

Fine. I’ll be downstairs in a minute.

 **Mingyu** **∞**

I’ll make you some fried rice.

 **Hao** **♡**

.♡

***

“Seungkwannie?”

Wonwoo shook his head.

“He told on us when we watched Train to Busan, he cannot be trusted.” He said seriously.

Eleven days.

They had kept this up for eleven days.

And they needed some help.

“And how about Channie?”

“Not Channie.” He said immediately. “Cats still make him scared, I think he’ll cry if he sees one.”

Junhui sighed, slumping on the bed.

 _Whiskers_ was sleeping on Junhui’s desk, right over his math notes.

“We can’t keep hiding him like this forever.” Wonwoo said, with a small sigh. It had been obvious, ever since he talked to Seungcheol.

And he thought that maybe Mingyu suspected a little too.

“Why not? We’ve been doing well so far.”

“Well, _yeah_ , but it’s not the end of the semester yet,” Wonwoo considered, because then they’d really need to study and they couldn’t take the time off to travel between houses so no one would discover Whiskers. “We can’t keep staying on each other houses forever. And I’m afraid someone will find him while we’re at school.”

“But if we’re at school, then our parents are working so, there’s no problem.”

“Yes, but weekends? And vacations? And what if we actually can’t cover for each other? They’ll find out right away.”

Junhui’s eyes traveled towards Whiskers, clearly thinking it through.

Wonwoo could see the exact moment it dawned him.

“You’re right.”

“If we think long term, we’ll need to give him for adoption,” Junhui’s face twisted in displeasure and honestly? Wonwoo thought the same. He wanted to keep him too. “Or maybe sugarcoating our parents until they give in and they let any of us have a cat, and then we’ll just… you know, say that we went to a cat shelter and picked this one.”

Junhui parted his lips, as if he were amazed that Wonwoo was _that_ smart.

“I’ll try to make Seungcheol-appa and Jeonghan-appa say yes. And I’ll keep showing Channie lots of cat videos so he won’t be afraid of them.”

“Okay!” Junhui smiled. “I’ll try to save for that Chanel bag then!”

Wonwoo’s smile faded a little, did Junhui even know how much that costed?

(Wonwoo did, he looked it up).

“... I think we’re going to need a lot of more time to do that.”

***

“Shion.”

“What?” Junhui asked, groggily, from his side of the bed.

He had invited him over tonight.

It was day fifteen.

“You said I could think of a name too.” Wonwoo whined, offended that his friend had forgotten.

He didn’t like _Whiskers_ , it was so common.

If he was finally going to get a cat, he’d name it with something cool and meaningful.

Junhui blinked awake, rubbing at his eyes tiredly.

“Why Shion?”

“There’s a japanese author that I like, and it’s her last name. Oh! and it’s also a flower. It’s called aster tataricus and it means—”

“Is it a boy’s or a girl’s name?”

That was so _not_ the point.

But Wonwoo still replied, as he stared at the ceiling of his room.

“It’s unisex.”

Silence hung between them.

“I thought you meant Shion from that anime we saw… what was it called?”

Wonwoo took a deep breath.

“No.6, but that’s not the point, the _point_ is that this is the perfect name for him.”

“Whiskers is nice too.” Junhui said, now sounding more awake. He shuffled under the covers, and Wonwoo felt his arms wrapping around him.

He wasn’t that much of a cuddler, but he had gotten used to Junhui hugging him as he slept.

“I’m not saying it’s not. I just think Shion’s really cool.” He remembered whispering this time, just in case his parents or brothers were still awake.

Junhui took so long in replying that Wonwoo thought he might have fallen asleep.

“Okay, let’s do this then, tomorrow morning we’ll put him in the middle and we’ll both call him names, and—”

“I’m not doing that to Shion, why must he pick between his parents?”

“Oh, so we are his parents now?”

“I meant like caretakers, why do you have to make it sound so weird—” Wonwoo said, cheeks burning with embarrassment. “You know what, shut up.”

“You shut up.”

“ _No_ , you shut up.”

“You started this!”

“Don’t _shout_.”

“Shut up.” Junhui whispered.

Silence hung between them again, and if Wonwoo paid enough attention, between the soft sound of classical music, he could hear Shion’s breathing.

“Goodnight.”

“... goodnight.”

***

Wonwoo knew that they couldn’t possibly hide _Whiskers/Shion_ forever.

And _of course_ that all of them were actually together when they found out.

Uncle Mingyu had invited them all for dinner after Drama Club, Wonwoo had said it’d be _quieter_ to spend the afternoon in Uncle Minghao’s house (which was actually true), so he had been taking care of Whiskers/Shion, while he was in Junhui’s bedroom.

And Uncle Mingyu arrived with both Junhui and Seungkwan from school.

And Jeonghan, Seungcheol and Channie came from his house.

So all of them were there.

Eight pm.

Dinner time.

(Uncle Mingyu had prepared japchae).

And everything had gone surprisingly well!

Whiskers/Shion had peacefully stayed hidden in Junhui’s bedroom while they had dinner.

And they were _almost_ gone, but Seungkwan had said he was cold, so Uncle MInghao had said that he could borrow a jacket from Junhui’s bedroom.

And the information _only_ clicked in both of their minds, when Seungkwan came downstairs with a confused expression, holding—

Holding Uncle Minghao’s Chanel bag.

Everyone’s eyes turned towards the ten year old.

“Hyung, what is this?” Seungkwan asked, frowning a little.

“Oh no.” Junhui mumbled under this breath.

“Is this a ball?” Chan asked, brows furrowing as well.

“That’s not—It’s our _kitten_ _carrier_.” Junhui clarified, taking it from Seungkwan’s hand.

“Junnie, _no_.”

Oh, they were doomed.

They were so doomed.

At least the cat hadn’t actually appeared, but Junhui had already spilled it so—

“Is that my Chanel bag?”

Wonwoo faintly heard Uncle Minghao hiss something under his breath, but he didn’t think it was meant to be understood by them anyway.

Okay, they had destroyed the bag, but Whiskers/Shion hadn’t appeared in the scene, so they were fine, they could—

Then of course the cat came slowly trudging downstairs, meowing when he noticed the crowd in the living room.

“I knew you should have stayed at my house,” Wonwoo whispered under his breath, covering his face.

“Hyung, you hid a kitten in our house and you didn’t tell me?”

“Wonwoo, you hid a kitten in our house?” Seungcheol repeated, sounding as surprised as everyone looked. Wonwoo thought he might faint, any second now. He’d get punished for life. “How did you… Why didn’t you tell us?”

“I just…” Okay, he’d just tell the truth, they really wanted the kitten, but they hadn’t said anything, because they knew it wasn’t possible. Channie was afraid and they couldn’t possibly— “I really—”

“Wait a second.” Mingyu said, looking between Junhui and Wonwoo. “I _knew_ it! I knew you guys were hiding something, but everyone _refused_ to believe me! You made me think I was crazy!”

“Gyu, now it’s really not the time.”

“But _Hao,_ they—”

“ _Appa_.” Chan screeched, hiding behind Jeonghan and tugging at his sweater in fear, when Whiskers decided to curiously approach his way.

Wonwoo rushed to take the kitten into his arms and leave him gently on the sofa, away from his brother.

“Okay, let’s all calm down.” Seungcheol said, as Jeonghan picked up the child and kissed the top of his head. He sounded stern, but not _mad_ and Wonwoo was thankful. “I can’t believe you’ve been hiding this kitten from us for a week.”

“It was actually two—” Wonwoo elbowed Junhui in the ribs. “ _Yes_ , one week.”

“I actually thought… um, you were—” Mingyu started, his face twisting in discomfort. “You know, doing like teenager stuff—”

Junhui and Wonwoo exchanged a look.

What was…

 _Then_ it clicked.

Uncle Mingyu’s awkward expression…

“Ew.” Wonwoo said, cheeks burning up. “Ew, ew, _ew_. Please, Uncle, don’t ever imply that.”

“Well, you’re not kids anymore, Junhui’s about to turn fourteen and—”

Oh no.

“It is perfectly normal though, a healthy amount of explora—”

“Oh, Jeonghan-appa, not you too.” Wonwoo groaned, covering his face with his hands. “Please, this is so embarrassing.”

“If we have to do _the talk_ , then I—”

“ _Han_ , he’s my baby.” Seungcheol protested, covering Wonwoo’s ears. “How could you even suggest that?”

“I'm not a baby.”

“ _Cheol_ , if anything he's _our_ baby, so—”

“I'm _not_ a baby anymore, I'm thir—”

“What does _the talk_ mean?” Seungkwan asked, tugging on Mingyu’s sleeve.

“Well…”

“Don’t say a word, Mingyu.” Jeonghan warned, raising a hand.

“I do not mean to interrupt.” Minghao cleared his throat. “But I think we’re going off-topic here.”

Right.

All the eyes went back to the cause of this predicament.

The kitten looked at them, tilting his tiny head.

 _is all of this fuss because of me?_ Wonwoo thought it meant.

“Right.” Seungcheol took a deep breath, willing to calm everyone down. Wonwoo’s cheeks were already burning from embarrassment, so much had happened in one second, they had found out about the kitten and the bag, and they had suspected _that_ from them.

Wonwoo didn’t even want to think of that right now.

“I don’t know how you guys managed to hide this kitten from us, but… Wonnie,” He looked into his eyes, and he was apologetic. And Wonwoo knew, Seungcheol had always wanted him to have a cat too. “I’m sorry, baby. But you know we can’t actually keep it.”

Wonwoo only looked down, he knew that by now, but it still made him sad to hear it.

He didn’t need to focus on Junhui to faintly register a few words that he said to Minghao, they always spoke in Chinese whenever they were together.

He picked up _dad_ (that was the easiest, since he said that all the time, bàba) and _sorry_ and _ruin_ , so he figured he meant the bag.

Wonwoo always wondered if they knew he could understand them, just a little.

He didn’t know for how long he went silent, but when he looked up, Jeonghan and Seungcheol had exchanged apologetic looks.

Then they nodded to each other.

“Look… um, how about if we see if he’s healthy enough first, okay? He’s really tiny even for a kitten. Maybe he needs to stay in a vet clinic for a while.” Seungcheol said, reaching out to place a hand on Wonwoo’s shoulder. Although Wonwoo knew that he also was directing his words at Junhui. “ _Then_ we’ll see if any of us can adopt him, okay? A pet is an addition to a family, so it’s a big responsibility.”

“You two took good care of him.” Jeonghan rushed to add, because Junhui and Wonwoo still looked the tiniest bit disappointed.

And Wonwoo kind of was.

Actually he knew that the only thing stopping them from taking the kitten home was Channie’s fear of them and he didn’t want to blame his brother for—

“Appa.”

Everyone’s attention turned to the youngest, who was sitting in the couch with none other than the _kitten_ in his lap.

“Appa!” Chan smiled, showing the gap between his teeth. He seemed totally unbothered by the _chaos_ that had been going in the living room just a moment ago. “Look! I think he likes me.”

Whiskers/Shion let out an affirmative _meow_.

…

Wonwoo almost groaned in frustration.

Wait.

_Really?_

 

(“A cat, huh?”

Seungcheol sighed, doing his best to keep his eyes on the road.

“A cat,” He confirmed. At the backseat, Chan and Seungkwan were dozing off, and Wonwoo was sound asleep too, protectively holding the shoe box where the _cat_ slept too.

“I think we—”

“I agree.” Jeonghan playfully hit him on the side, _I didn’t even say anything_ , it meant. “Wonwoo deserves the cat. He’s been nothing but a good hyung, student and son this year, and all these years, to be honest. And Channie is not afraid of it anymore. So nothing is stopping us from letting him have it.”

Jeonghan hummed his agreement, reaching out to lace their hands.

“A new addition to the family.” He said, and this time, Seungcheol smiled a little. He brought Jeonghan’s hand to his mouth and placed a gentle kiss on his knuckles.

A new addition to the family it was.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is [Uncle Minghao's Chanel bag](https://www.chanel.com/en_WW/fashion/p/hdb/as0662b00573/as0662b00573n4615/beach-ball-minaudiere-resin-goldtone-metal-turquoise-pink-white-transparent.html)!  
> Also I can't believe I actually wrote this, but Wonwoo deserved a cat and I needed to write more Junhui.  
> Raise your hand if you felt any second hand embarrassment from the adults implying *that*


	5. Junhui/Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Junhui leaves one house behind (only to find home).

Junhui didn’t remember saying yes to this.

He remembered a lot of things about that day.

He made his bags.

(He noticed he wasn’t _that_ attached to anything in his room?)

He said goodbye.

(Not even one hug _lingered_ ).

He must have seen the house one last time, but he didn’t recall it.

(It was small, but it felt _so_ big).

But the most important thing, the _thing_ that had made a difference back then, the thing that made him fly from home after ten years:  

 _Tell me, do you want to stay here_?

Junhui hadn’t even hesitated.

_No._

Sure, he hadn’t said _yes_ , but he had never felt more sure about that _no_.

***

“Are you sure about this?”

The plane had just taken off, certainly it wasn’t the time to ask oneself that.

It was too late for regrets.

They had done the paperwork, they had packed the bags, they had said their goodbyes.

Minghao didn’t think he’d be _ever_ coming back.

There was no way he’d go back.

Oh.

There was _no_ way he’d go back.

Ever.

He gripped the armrest tight, suddenly feeling a little sick.

 _They_ wouldn’t come back.

At his side, his nephew reached out a hesitant hand and placed it over his own.

The unpleasant feeling at the upper part of his stomach just wouldn’t disappear, but Minghao couldn’t let that show.

Not now, not _here_.

“I’m absolutely sure.” He replied, squeezing the offered hand.

He didn’t regret it. Not at all.

It was just that… he was suddenly aware of how hard this would be and… he hadn’t told _anyone_ about this.

Not even Mingyu.

He was so afraid of the repercussions.

Of the consequences.

“You don’t look so sure, Uncle.” Junhui commented, not unkindly and Minghao turned to look at him, for the first time since they had gotten into the plane.

“I am. I swear I am, I’m just…”

“Mad?” Junhui provided, with a small smile.

Minghao might have been underestimating him.

Not just because he was a ten year old he wouldn’t understand what was going on… if he thought about Wonwoo, who had the same age, he pretty much understood everything by now.

Maybe it was time for Minghao to stop treating him like a child.

“ _Y_ _es_ , well… I mean _no_.” Minghao sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I’m not mad at  _you_. I’m just… mad.”

Junhui hummed in agreement, eyes glued to the magazine that peeked from the seat in front.

“Are you… mad at my mom then?” He asked quietly and Minghao took a deep breath again.

Yes.

 _Yes_.

He didn’t think he had ever been madder at someone.

But… it was more complicated than that, and it’d be unfair to let that show now.

“That doesn’t matter, right now.” Minghao replied instead, just because he didn’t want to make the kid feel even sadder. And he knew he would if he said yes. “You should get some sleep, okay?”

There was a moment of silence.

Junhui slowly let go of Minghao’s hand and that was the moment the adult knew he had fucked up.

“I’m not mad at her… so you don’t have to be just for me.” He explained quietly, turning to look outside.

Huh.

Three weeks in China.

Three whole weeks and maybe Minghao had been _definitely_ underestimating Junhui.

He really needed to up his game if he was about to take care of this kid from now on.

“You’re right.” He replied, having the sudden urge to reach out and run a hand through his soft hair, so he did. Junhui smiled at the gesture, and Minghao did so too. “Now do get some sleep.” He added, because he was still the adult here.

Junhui rolled his eyes a little, but instead of leaning towards the window as Minghao had thought he would, he did it towards his shoulder, resting his cheek on it.

Minghao tried not to stiffen at the sudden show of affection.

“How can I call you when we get to Korea?” He heard after a second and…

That was a tough one, he didn’t know if he ever deserved to be called _dad_ by him, although he had kind of adopted him?

“Whatever you want.” Minghao said, wrapping an arm around Junhui’s shoulders and pulling him close.

He was still experiencing a lot of self doubt about this.

He didn’t know how would Mingyu react.

But right now? This still felt like a good decision.

“Okay.”

***

Mingyu didn’t know what to do.

In all his life, in countless occasions, Minghao had surprised him.

It was one of the reasons why Mingyu enjoyed being with him.

He was _fascinated_. Ever since they had met, until they became friends, then when they got together.

Everyday with Minghao was an adventure.

 _But_ maybe _today_ of all days, he had underestimated him and his ability to surprise him.

Because _this one_ particular situation certainly raised the bar.

“He’s staying with me.”

 _He_ , was Minghao’s ten year old nephew.

(Which Mingyu only met for the first time today!)

Minghao was only supposed to visit China for some _family issues_ and even though things had gotten complicated and he had ended up staying a week more, Mingyu didn’t expect Minghao to appear with _a_ kid.

Just like that.

 _And_ stating: he’s staying with me.

Had he… just… adopted him? Could people even do that? Mingyu had never dared to ask and he only knew the existence of a few of Minghao’s family members, but… wasn’t this too sudden?

What did this _mean_?

What had _happened_?

The most infuriating thing, was that after making this statement, Minghao had started making _bags_.

 _Bags_ to leave, Mingyu’s brain helpfully provided.

“I understand if we can’t stay together after this, you did say it wasn’t on your plans to have kids.”

 _Say something_.

 _Anything_.

“Hao.”

Well, not his best line, but…

“Hao.” He repeated, more firmly this time and Minghao let out a small hiss, dropping the sweater he was holding on the bed.

Silence hung in the room, and suddenly Mingyu was very aware of the kid waiting downstairs.

Extremely aware of the rapid beating of his own heart, of Minghao’s shaky hands and of the current situation.

Minghao had come back from China after three weeks with a _child_ , none other than his nephew.

What had happened with Minghao’s family? Mingyu really would like to know…

Had it been so bad?

There must have been something, something _terrible_ for Minghao to look that haunted and upset.

Mingyu’s heart ached for him.

For both of them.

The kid looked quiet, a bit awkward, but it was to be expected right? Not everyday you moved to a whole new country with your uncle and his partner.

Considering you only saw that Uncle like once a year.

 _Jesus_ , this was crazy.

“I’ll have my things out by the end of the week.” Minghao whispered, but made no move to keep packing.

Mingyu took it as a chance.

He stepped towards the bed and slowly reached out to Minghao’s hand.

Softly, gently, as if he didn’t want to scare him.

It didn’t work.

Minghao turned quickly, pulling himself away from him and Mingyu didn’t miss the shake on his voice, on his hands.

His eyes were brimming with unshed tears.

Oh, Mingyu was _this_ close to fly back to China and kick some asses.

Who had hurt him and _how_?

He wanted to know _now_.

“How are you not freaking out at this?” Minghao spat, covering his eyes for a moment. Mingyu could only remember a handful of situations where he had seen his boyfriend so distressed, and it made him upset as well. “He’s _such_ a big responsibility? How are you not scared? How can you take this so lightly?”

Mingyu didn’t move from his spot, just watching him hyperventilate.

It hurt him, but Minghao needed to get this out of his chest.

“I come back after three weeks with a kid and you just… stay here? Doing nothing?” He asked, voice cracking. “We’re not even married like Jeonghan and Seungcheol or high school sweethearts like Soonyoung and Jihoon.”

Mingyu stayed in silence, taking one step closer.

Minghao didn’t pull back.

“You don’t even know me.” He ended bitterly, tears rolling down his cheeks and it squeezed painfully at Mingyu’s heart. “I didn’t… I didn’t even tell you _why_ I was going and you didn’t ask.”

That was true.

Mingyu hadn’t asked, just wished him good luck, said that he loved him and prayed for the best.

Clearly something had happened, something _bad_ and it had affected Minghao in more than one way.

But it wasn’t the right time to ask about that.

Mingyu would wait forever if he had to, but he wouldn’t ask now.

“Hao.” He said softly, but Minghao was too worried about trying to breathe properly, tears rolling down until they reached his jaw and fell on his shirt. “I do know you.”

Minghao sniffled in response and Mingyu had to resist the urge to hug him and kiss the tears away, because Minghao needed to hear this.

“Of course I know you.” He insisted, smiling when he did reach out and Minghao didn’t pull back. “Even if I knew what happened there… it wouldn’t change my opinion of you. I’m sure you did the best… you always do.”

Mingyu gently squeezed Minghao’s shoulders, pulling him a bit closer to him.

He was shaking all over and Mingyu felt his eyes filling with tears at the sight.

Oh, this was going to be death of him.

He already knew what he was going to reply to this.

“And it is scary.” He continued, tone firm but gentle. “And he’s such a big responsibility. And it’s okay to be scared.”

 _“Yes_ , so leave while—”

“Hey, hey. It’s okay to be scared.” Mingyu repeated, rubbing one of his arms up and down, hoping to comfort him somehow. “It’s okay for _you_ to be scared.”

Minghao tensed on his arms, but Mingyu didn’t let go.

He’d _never_ let go.

No matter what.

“I’m not—”

“We’re together.”

“I _said_ I’m—”

“We’re together in this.” He repeated, just so the words would make it past Minghao’s thick skull. (Well, not like he had anything bad to say about people with thick skulls, he was one of them). “I’m not letting you go through this all by yourself. I’ll stay.”

Minghao weakly shook his head, but Mingyu was having none of that, so he pulled him a little closer.

“I want to stay.” He begged, his own voice cracking. “Please let me stay.”

There was just… no way that he’d let this happen without him.

Minghao wasn’t about to fight his demons on his own.

Mingyu tightened the hold with him, suddenly overwhelmed by the feeling of losing Minghao.

He didn’t think he was ready to take care of a child, but he knew he was _less_ ready to let Minghao leave.

He just couldn’t imagine an empty house.

Minghao sagged against his hold, gingerly wrapping his arms around Mingyu’s waist.

For the first time today, Mingyu relaxed a little, looking up only to let his chin rest on the top of his lover’s head.

“Okay.”

Wait.

What?

Mingyu pulled back a little, placing his hands on Minghao’s shoulders and getting a look good at him.

“You just said okay?” He asked, just in case he hadn’t heard correctly.

Minghao sniffled a little again and rolled his eyes, suddenly annoyed.

That was more like him.

“I’m not repeating that, if you didn’t hear it then—”

“I did! I did hear it.” Mingyu said enthusiastically, placing a big kiss on Minghao’s damp cheek. “Thank you. Thank you, thank you, _thank you_.”

“You’re such an idiot, why are you thanking _me_? I should be thanking you.” Minghao said with a huff, leaning back into Mingyu’s chest.

Mingyu thought he might jump from happiness right now.

(Although he wouldn’t, he didn’t want to scare Minghao away).

The hug lingered for a few seconds, and Mingyu for once felt more relaxed, just holding Minghao close.

He hadn’t held him like this in three weeks.

And he had missed him _so_ much.

“Truth is, we’re probably going to suck at this.” Minghao blurted out, and it caused an unattractive chuckle to leave Mingyu’s mouth.

Okay, fair.

He didn’t have that much experience with parenting things.

Although he had done well with Wonwoo.

And with Seungkwan too.

“It doesn’t mean we won’t try.” He said easily and he felt Minghao smiling against his chest.

Okay, this was so much better.

He could _anything_ if he had Minghao here.

There was... just one last thing before heading downstairs and introducing himself to his new… kid? Apparently.

“I know you might not want to… but you know you could, right? Tell me about what happened there.” He offered, just in case Minghao didn’t know.

Just in case he needed the reminder.

Minghao took a deep shaky breath, leaning a bit more in the embrace.

And even before he said anything, Mingyu’s heart had already dropped on his chest.

What if…

“About that…” He whispered. “You don’t want to know.”

***

**KIM MINGYU**

SOS

**KIM MINGYU**

SOS

**KIM MINGYU**

SOS

**KIM MINGYU**

SOS

**KIM MINGYU**

SOS

**KIM MINGYU**

ANSWER THE DAMN PHONE

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

WHY IS EVERYTHING IN CAPS LOCK. ARE YOU OKAY????

**KIM MINGYU**

OF COURSE NOT!!! WHY WOULD I SAY SOS OTHERWISE????

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

WHAT IS IT THEN? IS IT A FIRE?

**KIM MINGYU**

AS IF I’D CALL _YOU_ IN CASE OF A FIRE HYUNG

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

THEN WHAAAAT? I’M WORK RN YOU KNOW?

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

wait, I was finally able to get rid of the caps lock, but now it seems like I’m less worried?

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

i’m confused, i just changed my phone, you know?

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

I’M STILL WORRIED MY DEAR DONGSAENG, WHAT CAN HYUNG DO TO HELP YOU

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

*??????

**KIM MINGYU**

okay… okay. you know how Hao went to China right?

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

if this is about the keychain i asked him about, tell him it’s okay if he forgot lol. no need to fuss?

**KIM MINGYU**

why would i EVER say SOS about a keychain?

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

i don’t know how attached you are to them, but i really like keychains. i’ve been collecting them since our trip to paris last year.

**KIM MINGYU**

hyung, first, three keychains are NOT a collection, second, CAN YOU PLEASE PAY ATTENTION TO MY PREDICAMENT HERE?

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

OKAY FINE, spit it out.

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

and for your information, i’ve got FOUR keychains.

**KIM MINGYU**

he brought a kid with him. like for him to stay. remember he talked about junhui? his nephew? well, he’s not six anymore and he came back. to stay. in korea. forever.

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

oh

**KIM MINGYU**

OH? IS THAT ALL?

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

well, that’s not so bad isn’t it?

**KIM MINGYU**

this is life changing, how can you say that???

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

well… what did you do when he told you? did you get mad? did you accept it? omg did you cry? i bet you did

**KIM MINGYU**

I DIDN’T CRY. told him he was okay. that i’d stay with him, he wanted to leave! as if i’d let that happen!

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

okay… and you meant that, right?

**KIM MINGYU**

of course i mean that! I LOVE HIM. i support him and every decision he makes.

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

then… why are you freaking out? seems like you handled it well

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

gyu?

**KIM MINGYU**

…

**KIM MINGYU**

i did handle it well

**KIM MINGYU**

i truly think i don’t mind? i mean, i think i’m kinda okay with this?

**KIM MINGYU**

it’s been two days, but i think we’re adapting already? i don’t know, think this might work

**KIM MINGYU**

Hao is really good at this, i mean not jeonghan-good, but pretty good. besides he looks cute interacting with kids.

**KIM MINGYU**

i think everything will work out. we’ll be okay

**KIM MINGYU**

aaaaaaaaah thank you hyung, i feel so much better now!

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

i don’t know what i did, but you’re welcome! pay me with some homemade kimchi ♡♡♡♡♡♡

**KIM MINGYU**

of course, whatever you want. tomorrow though, today we’re going to seungcheol-hyung’s house for dinner.

**KWON SOONYOUNG**

i’ll be expecting it tomorrow then ♡♡♡♡♡♡

***

“He’s my son.”

All eyes turned to the newcomer, standing stiffly between Minghao and Mingyu.

The boy (apparently Minghao’s son now?) looked up, an awkward smile playing on his handsome face.

Okay, this _wasn’t_ what Jeonghan and Seungcheol expected when Minghao and Mingyu called to ask if they could have dinner at their house?

Minghao had a son now?

He was too young, something certainly didn’t add up, Seungcheol thought, dumbly holding the doorknob with a weird expression on his face.

He had no idea that Mingyu and Minghao had plans for adopting a kid…

Seungkwan and Wonwoo looked just as dumbfounded as Seungcheol, so _Jeonghan_ was the first one to react.

He quickly stood up from the couch, approaching the adults on the doorway and leaning down to genuinely smile at the kid.

“Hi, you must be Junhui, right?” He said, placing a hand on the kid’s shoulder. “Is it okay for me to call you Junnie?”

Junhui’s smile went from awkward to a shy one, and he nodded.

 _How did Jeonghan know about Junnie_ ? I _didn’t know!_ Mingyu thought, frowning.

And by the way Seungcheol was looking back at Mingyu, both of them had no clue how Jeonghan had gotten that information.

Jeonghan always knew everything, but no one knew how.

Not that Minghao could actually comment on that either, because he was looking down, fringe covering his eyes.

Mingyu reached out to squeeze his hand gently, hoping to provide him some comfort.

“Handsomeness must run the family, right?” Jeonghan commented and it made Junhui visibly relax.

Okay, clearly Jeonghan was getting there, but Seungcheol thought that maybe he needed to help too.

He waved a little at Wonwoo, and in a few seconds, the ten year old had crossed the living room and stood by his side.

Seungcheol kissed the top of his head in thanks.

“Hi Junnie.” Seungcheol said, cheeks dimpling when he smiled at him. “Nice to meet you. I’m Seungcheol and this is my husband, Jeonghan.” He lightly tapped on his head, getting a small pout in response.

It made Junhui laugh, so Seungcheol thought it was worth it.

“And this is our eldest, Wonwoo.”

“Hello.” Wonwoo gave him a small polite smile and then he bowed.  

“Hi,” Junhui replied, eyes crinkling as he smiled back.

 _Adorable_ , Seungcheol thought.

“I think you two are the same age.” Jeonghan commented, placing a hand on Wonwoo’s back. And it made both Mingyu and Seungcheol wonder _more_ about how much he knew about this. “Wonnie, how about you show Junnie your room?”

Wonwoo’s cheeks went red, clearly uncomfortable at being exposed like that.

His parents knew best than to just send him to hang out with a strange kid just because they had similar ages, so Wonwoo thought that maybe this was an emergency.

And besides this wasn't a regular kid, right? This was family. 

And family was different.

He was still worried about what they'd talk about, but he tried a smile anyway.

“Is that okay?” Jeonghan asked, eyes meeting with Minghao’s for the first time since they had arrived.

Minghao gave him a small nod and Jeonghan smiled.

“Okay, off you go.” Jeonghan rubbed Wonwoo’s back gently (he was pretty sure his dad knew how he felt about this) and tilted his head, so Junhui would follow along. 

Seungcheol noticed their five year old, hiding behind the couch and he approached towards him, easily lifting Seungkwan up and kissing his cheek.

An adult conversation was in order, so the kids shouldn’t stay here right now.

“Seungkwannie, baby, can you go upstairs with your hyung and with Junnie? You can play until dinner time okay?” He said, the kid immediately getting excited about the idea of playing.

He set him down with a pat on his backside and all three kids headed upstairs.

“Have fun.” Seungcheol said, watching them go.

Then he turned towards Mingyu and Minghao.

Jeonghan waited until the three sets of footsteps made it upstairs and he took a deep breath, pulling Minghao into a hug.

Minghao gingerly wrapped his arms around Jeonghan’s waist, but the hug still lingered for a few seconds.

“Are you okay?” He asked, not _what happened_ or _what is he doing here_ , just _are you okay_ and Minghao appreciated it.

Seungcheol approached to them as well, signaling for them to sit down so they’d be able to talk this through.

Not every day one of your friends came back from a trip to his hometown with a ten year old kid.

Something must have happened.

Jeonghan placed a gentle hand on Minghao’s cheek, giving him a worried glance now that the kids were gone.

Seungcheol was sure that there were a lot of unspoken words on that exchange. 

“Let’s settle down first, yeah?” Seungcheol offered, when neither of them moved.

“Hyung is right.” Mingyu insisted, placing his hand on Minghao’s lower back. “Come on, let’s sit.”

Not even ten minutes had passed, and Minghao had quickly explained (not with much details), that he’d be staying with Junhui in the meantime.

Because Junhui’s parents had some _difficulties_ and _family issues_.

He didn’t say it was permanent, but it looked like it was?

Still, neither Seungcheol nor Jeonghan commented on it.

It just wasn’t the time.

“That’s it.” Minghao said, with a small tiresome sigh.

“We’re just doing it.” Mingyu nodded.

Jeonghan and Seungcheol were sitting side by side and they exchanged one quick look.

This was surprising, but… how could they ever judge their friends when they had adopted two kids in the span of three years?

They could only support them.

And love Junhui as much as Minghao and Mingyu loved Wonwoo and Seungkwan.

“I mean Seungcheol-hyung does it, so it can't be that hard.” Mingyu added, with a mischievous smile, effectively breaking the tense mood.

Not a second passed and Seungcheol had stood up, just to shove him with an offended _hey_!

Jeonghan hid a smile behind his hand, patting Seungcheol’s ass as soon as he stood up.

When they had laughed a little and settled back down again, Jeonghan turned serious once more, staring at Mingyu.

“It’s really hard, Gyu.” Jeonghan commented, not just because he wanted to defend Seungcheol (and he did), but also because it was the truth. And there was no point in sugarcoating it. “But it’s totally worth it and I bet you’ll do wonderful. Both of you will.”

Seungcheol agreed with a small nod, eyes fixing on their friends.

“If you ever need help with him, we’re here for you.”   

Mingyu gave them a thankful smile, but Minghao still looked distressed, playing with the hem of his oversized shirt.

“You don’t want to know?” he asked, all of the sudden. “I know this is surprising, it’s just that—”

But Jeonghan was having none of that, he shifted on the couch, so he could reach out and squeeze his hand.

“Every kid deserves to live with a loving family. I’m sure you decided based on what you thought was best for him.”

It was an innocent statement, but all of them could feel the shift on the mood.

The atmosphere got tense, and Mingyu took a moment to realize _why_.

It was Seungcheol.

Suddenly, the eldest was looking down, lips pursing.

But _why_?

Jeonghan hadn’t said anything wrong, had he? What did this mean?

Seungcheol and Jeonghan didn’t exchange any looks as Seungcheol stood up, mumbling a small _I’ll check on dinner_ and then heading towards the kitchen.

Mingyu wasn’t entirely sure, but he was pretty sure Seungcheol’s eyes had flashed something akin to hurt.

For only one second before he turned and decided to leave.

An awkward silence followed and Jeonghan tried not to show how that reaction had affected him too.

(He totally failed, but Mingyu wouldn’t tell him that).

“Ah… is hyung okay? I was only joking with that…” Mingyu started, shifting uncomfortably. Was it his fault? He knew Seungcheol was a bit insecure about his parenting skills, but somehow this seemed like something different.

And he had never seen Jeonghan and Seungcheol fight or something.

This was uncharted territory and he was uncomfortable.

Jeonghan seemed to take a moment, probably struggling to find the right words.

“It’s not your fault, he’s just…” Jeonghan sighed. “We’re just—we’re going through a rough patch I guess.”

Oh.

That was… unexpected.

“Is it about Seungkwannie?” Mingyu asked, because he knew they have been having a hard time with him adapting.

Jeonghan took a deep breath, giving them a kind smile.

“No, it’s…” He started, but shook his head instead. “Doesn’t matter.”

“Hyung,” Minghao started looking between Jeonghan and Seungcheol. “You could have told us… we wouldn’t have barged in if it was a bad time.”

Jeonghan immediately raised his hands, giving them another of those reassuring smiles.

“Don’t be silly. We’re always there for you.” He said. “We’ll work it out, okay? Don’t worry about that. Just… tell me more, how are you planning to do this?”

Mingyu’s eyes still traveled to Seungcheol, who was with his back turned to them, hands on the kitchen counter.

He was squeezing hard.

Mingyu wasn’t sure, but… he thought Seungcheol looked sad.

Not _mad_. Just…

“So, you guys need anything?” Jeonghan’s voice interrupted his thoughts. “He could be in the same school as Wonnie if we recommend…”

Guess he’d try to figure what was going on later.

***

Okay, this was awkward.

Not like _the_ most awkward Wonwoo had encountered, but it was still _very_ awkward.

Just because someone was the same age as him it didn’t mean they’d automatically get along.

Although he did suspect that it was because his dads just wanted to have an _adult conversation_ with his uncles, but still!

What was he supposed to do with this kid?

What did _show him your room_ even mean? Was that a code word for something else?

“Um…” Wonwoo started, looking at _Junhui_ ’s face for a moment and then immediately diverting his eyes when he got a sly smile in return.

Oh. This was weird.

So weird.

Luckily, Seungkwan was there to save him.

“Hyung, where have you been all this time?” Seungkwan asked curiously. “Were you adopted too? Did Uncle Minghao and Uncle Mingyu adopt you? Do you know _The Angel house_? Because—”

Wonwoo reached out to pat on the five year old’s shoulder.

“Seungkwannie, give Junhui some space, okay? One question at a time.” Wonwoo warned gently, although Junhui didn’t seem too overwhelmed, just curious.

“It’s okay.” Junhui said, easily, looking unbothered by the slight tense mood.

Or maybe Wonwoo was the only one awkward?

This was just so sudden… he didn’t remember Uncle Mingyu and Uncle MInghao telling him (or anyone really) that they wanted to adopt.

But _of course_ Junhui was adopted, because there was no way—

“Uncle Minghao… as you said,” Junhui started, eyes fixing on Wonwoo’s. “He’s my dad.”

“What?” Wonwoo asked, not being able to hide his surprise. “Like your biological one?”

“Yes.”

Wait a second.

Wonwoo started counting… Uncle Minghao was two year younger than his dads. Which meant that he was twenty five, which _meant_ that at fifteen—

“That’s so cool!” Seungkwan said excitedly, cupping on Junhui’s cheeks. “That’s why you look so alike. Is it true that all people in China don’t like ice cream?”

This made no sense.

Or did it?

Unless Junhui was lying… but why would he lie?

Junhui let out a small laugh.

“So cute.” He told Seungkwan, patting on his head.

“I’m not cute, hyung tell him!”

Wonwoo was still frowning a little, deep in thought.

“Hyung!”

“I think… hyung is distracted.” Junhui provided.

“Hyung!” Seungkwan insisted, reaching out to tug one strand of Wonwoo’s hair.

“ _Ow_.”

“Hyung, you’re ignoring me.” He pouted and Wonwoo finally snapped out of it.

This whole situation was weird, but… but he was no one to say that Junhui was lying, right? That wasn’t very nice.

Maybe with time they’d know a bit more.

“Hyung! Junhui-hyung is our cousin now.” Seungkwan said easily, a huge excited smile on his lips.

It had been like five minutes, but Seungkwan was already perched on Junhui’s lap.

Wonwoo was just a bit surprised at them getting so close and so soon…

Ah, wait, cousin?

 _Cousin_? That was…

“I don’t know, Seungkwannie…”

“But hyung,” Seungkwan pouted. “If our Uncles have a baby, the baby is our cousin. Everyone knows this! It’s the basics! They taught me that at school!”  

Wonwoo was pretty sure that Seungkwan swore that all of his parents and uncles were blood related, but he didn’t want to break the illusion for him now.

And it did make sense, right?

If they kept calling Jihoon and Soonyoung and Minghao and Mingyu _uncle_ , then… then if they had kids, it only made sense for those kids to be like their cousins.

Seungkwan was right.

It was weird getting a cousin from one day to another one though…

“Right, our cousin.” Wonwoo confirmed, with a small smile. “Um… Junhui, right? Do you… is there anything you want to play with?”

There was still time until dinner and they had to do _something_ right?

“Wait, before we play! I’ll make you a drawing, hyung!” Seungkwan said excitedly, getting up from Junhui’s lap to run around Wonwoo’s room, picking up his pencil case. “Ah, hyung, where do we have stickers? I want to put some on hyung’s drawing.” Seungkwan said with a small pout, and Junhui reached out to offer him a piece of paper.

And _then_ it dawned him.

Paper and the stickers.

And Junhui’s smile.

Seungkwan was unbothered by Wonwoo’s frown and he left the room with an enthusiast _I’ll be back soon!_ (he didn’t like people watching him as he drew, he got kind of shy).

As they were finally alone, Wonwoo decided that he might as well ask.

Junhui had barely talked since he got here, only replying the most simple questions… and his hangul seemed a little…

And the sticker thingy just made him think…

“Do you… like understand us?” He asked, feeling a little dumb for just noticing this now.

Truth was, Junhui sounded a little… he had an accent, just like Seungkwan, and he took a moment to reply everything…

Maybe he was shy (just like Wonwoo was) or maybe…

“Just the basics.” Junhui replied, looking a little surprised (apparently Wonwoo was the first one pointing this out?) and making a vague hand gesture.

Oh.

That was…

He was probably nodding along with almost everything and Wonwoo had noticed _just now_ that maybe he didn’t understand them.

Well done, Wonwoo.

“Sorry… I just thought you would,” He started, awkwardly.

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not.” Wonwoo said immediately, and Junhui frowned, taken aback at the sudden harsh tone of his words. “It’ must be hard… people not understanding you. And the other way around.”

Junhui stayed in silence for a few seconds, considering, and Wonwoo got self conscious right away.

Was Junhui even understanding right now? Or was he just pretending like he was?

They had just met, but Wonwoo didn’t like him to pretend.

It wasn’t okay to pretend that you were fine when you weren’t, especially if you were with your family, and Wonwoo took those words by heart.

“People,” Junhui repeated. “I don’t care about people.”

Wonwoo blinked up at him, cheeks heating up although he wasn’t sure why.

“I’m okay if…” Junhui started, struggling to get the words out, so Wonwoo gave him a moment. “You understand.”

Wonwoo frowned a little and Junhui reached out to pat his head.

It was weird though… he had no idea about Junhui’s birthday, so he didn’t know  if he was older than him or not, but… in this particular moment, he kind of looked like he was older than Wonwoo.

“Thank you.” Junhui said, with the most genuine smile and Wonwoo couldn’t help but let himself be praised and smile too.

Oh, so… he was okay, because Wonwoo understood him.

Okay that was…

It kind of… made him a little emotional, but he didn’t know why.

They had only met today, but Wonwoo felt like they’d get along.

He never thought he’d have a same age friend in the family, and even though this had been sudden, he was thankful.

And by the way Junhui was smiling, maybe he felt the same.

“Um… I was… starting to watch Naruto.” He commented. “So we could watch that until dinner is ready.”

“Okay.” Junhui said, sitting down next to Wonwoo, shoulders bumping gently.

If it would have been anyone else, Wonwoo would have minded, but with Junhui… he had to admit he already felt comfortable with him.

“I’ll put on chinese subs.” Wonwoo offered, carrying the laptop towards his bed, so they could watch it from there. His desk had only one chair, so they couldn’t do it from there. He arranged the settings, Junhui placing enough pillows around so it’d be comfortable for them.

“You don’t have to.” Junhui said, but Wonwoo gave him a warm smile.

“It’s okay, I want to learn too. It’s not fun if only one of us understands what’s going on.” He assured him, reaching out to pat his shoulder. “And that’s what families do... “ He cleared his throat, suddenly embarrassed, but he forced himself to continue, knowing how important was this for him. “‘Cause… we’re cousins, right?”

Junhui’s cheeks got a little warm, and his eyes traveled to the screen instead, focusing on the opening song.

Wonwoo was thankful, he didn’t think he could look at him for a while, he was _so_ embarrassed.

Cousins, _right_ , Seungkwan could say it and sound cute but if he said it, it sounded weird, didn’t it? It was—

“Yes.” Junhui agreed, with a small smile. “We are.”

***

Okay, dinner preparations.

This was Mingyu’s specialty.

What he did best.

He couldn’t do wrong with this.

But as he washed his hands and got ready to cook… his eyes inevitably traveled to the new addition to their family (sitting on the couch, working on his homework).

Mingyu just…

Worried.

Ten days had passed since Junhui came to live here.

And he looked fine.

Not like Wonwoo when he first had arrived… Wonwoo had been quiet, shy, closed off. Now he was a goof, louder when he wanted to be, the smartest kid Mingyu had ever seen, playful and confident.

But Junhui… he looked strangely at ease here? Right from the beginning…

It wasn’t like that was a bad thing per sé, it was actually good!

And Mingyu had no idea what had happened back home, but…

Maybe this had been a right choice.

Junhui looked happy here and Minghao looked happy to have him, therefore _Mingyu_ was happy to see both of them happy.

Happy, happy, happy.

Perfect, perfect, perfect.

…

Then _why_ he got this feeling that Junhui was just pretending to be okay? Just a little?

Not that that was wrong… moving to a whole new country with a new family was hard. Not being okay was what one should expect…

But if Mingyu _was_ right and Junhui was _not_ okay, what should he do?

How should he tell Minghao?

He didn’t want to give his boyfriend another reason to worry.

And to be honest, he had no idea about how to comfort a ten year old boy.

And there was also the language barrier.

Minghao was _literally_ the best at communicating with Junhui.

Mingyu was trying to learn from both of them, and at the same time teach Junhui hangul, but.

Well, there was still some time for that.

For now? He’d cook Junhui delicious food.

That would be the way to his heart.

But he didn’t know a thing about Chinese dishes or cuisine.

Mingyu took a deep breath, pulling out his phone and thinking what to type.

Okay.

Food.

Comfort food.

Chinese comfort food.

Okay, this was stupid.

Truth was, he could totally take this as a chance to interact with Junhui.

So he would.

He took a deep steadying breath and headed towards the living room, tapping gently on Junhui’s shoulder.

The boy turned a little, giving him a small smile.

Now… he only got here a few days, but Mingyu thought that he looked happier already, healthier, his cheeks developing a rosy glow.

Or maybe Mingyu was just overly fond of this kid.

“I just…” He started, when Junhui gave him a curious look.

If he only knew what he was thinking…

Mingyu gingerly offered his phone.

“Is there anything you’d like me to cook?” He asked, feeling only a little silly for doing this.

And he felt even sillier when Junhui frowned a little (Mingyu wondered if he needed to rephrase) and then he slowly shook his head.

Oh.

That… wasn’t what he expected, actually.

They had been interacting just fine before, it’s not like he felt that Junhui didn’t like him… but he expected that the first time they were alone they’d just…

“Right… I’ll… dinner will be ready soon.” Mingyu said, trying not to feel hurt by this.

Maybe Junhui didn’t want to cause any trouble, that was why!

That totally made sense.

Or at least that’s why Mingyu tried to say to himself as he prepared a hot pot and homemade dumplings.

This was okay. Junhui did like him.

Otherwise Mingyu could tell.

Everyone could tell when people didn’t like you, Mingyu wasn’t dumb.

Or maybe he _was_ , because at the moment he made into the table, set the plates and served Junhui some food, and the kid had a first bite, he just—

He started _crying_.

Not like a tear rolling down his cheek.

A tear fell, then another one, then he started _weeping_.

Oh.

No.

“Oh my God, is it too spicy?” Of course he had made it spicy, why did he have to experiment with food today of all days? What was he thinking? “I tried to make it edible, but it said you had to add—and I did taste it and it was good, I think? Oh, Junnie—”

Junhui covered his face, his shoulders shaking a little as he tried to calm himself down.

Oh God.

How would he explain this to Minghao?

 _Yeah, Hao, the first time we stayed together I MADE HIM CRY_.

Mingyu didn’t know what to do!

He put his chopsticks down, trying to think.

Had he ever cried since he got here? Why didn’t Minghao tell him this could happen? What was he supposed to do?

Had he _ever_ cried since he got here?

“Do you want a napkin—I’ll cook something else! Or maybe I’ll call Minghao and we’ll—” He started looking around frantically, almost dropping his bowl of food all over his lap. “Ah, please, Junnie. Don’t cry.”

Junhui sniffled a little, trying a smile for Mingyu.

“It’s… I’m okay.” He whispered.

“It’s not, I’m sorry, I just wanted to do something nice for you and I made you cry.” Mingyu said, distress clear on his voice.

Jeonghan said not to freak out so the _kids_ wouldn’t freak out, but Mingyu hadn’t noticed how hard that was!

That was almost impossible.

How could he control that?

“It’s just… I missed it.” Junhui whispered.

Oh.

Was… was  _it_  his parents?

His home?

This wasn’t good.

He had seen Jeonghan-hyung comforting Wonwoo and Seungkwan with an easy _it’s okay baby_ , but Mingyu was nowhere near that yet!!! What was he supposed to do?

“You…” Mingyu started, unsure of what to say.

“The food.” Junhui clarified quickly, eyes fixed on his bowl.

Okay.

Mingyu wondered if it meant something else, it looked like he did (guess he’d never know, because he didn’t dare to ask).

But missing… whatever Junhui was missing was fine.

Understandable.

Mingyu’s heart eased a little and he took a deep calming breath, reaching out to squeeze his shoulder.

This was better.

Junhui didn’t need to hide what he was feeling and even though Mingyu had panicked, this was… fine.

“I’m sorry, Junnie.” Mingyu said.

And he was.

Because of his family issues and him leaving home.

For everything that had happened.

For… making the food too spicy.

Maybe sorry in advance for not being a fatherly figure.

At least not in the same way Seungcheol and Jeonghan were.

(And even Minghao now).

He was like… a nice big brother at most.

A good uncle.

Only Minghao would ever be _dad_ and Mingyu was okay with that.

He didn’t need to be _dad_ , he just… wanted this kid to know that he could trust him too.

That he’d be there for him.

“It’s okay, Mingyu-hyung.” He said quietly and Mingyu reached out to gently pinch his cheek, getting a small smile in return.

The crying had subdued and Junhui looked calmer, so Mingyu got up from his chair.

“I’m going to get you a napkin, okay? You don’t have to eat that if you don’t want to.” He called, heading towards the kitchen, when he heard a loud _thump_ (chair falling down) and three seconds later, two arms circling around his waist.

Wait a second.

Junhui was hugging him.

Junhui was hugging _him_.

Mingyu wasn’t entirely sure, but this might have been the first time Junhui had hugged someone.

(Like not in his life, he didn’t know what he had done before getting here, but ever since he came to Korea, Mingyu might have been the first!!).

“Thank you.” Junhui said, the rawness of his voice making Mingyu’s eyes water.

Yes, maybe Junhui wasn’t one hundred percent okay.

But Mingyu was there for him.

And he’d _always_ be.

Mingyu gently squeezed Junhui’s fingers, taking a deep shaky breath so he wouldn’t cry as he said the next words.

“Don’t mention it, Junnie.”

***

“You know…” Minghao started, one night after they were getting ready to go to bed, after helping Junhui with his homework.

(And four weeks since Junhui had come to stay with them).

It had been easy, the way they cleared up a room for him, set another plate on the dining table and took turns to go pick him up from school.

Junhui was easy to fall for and Mingyu loved him already.

“I have to tell you,” Minghao said, placing his book down to focus on Mingyu. Seungcheol had recommended him _i want to die, but i want to eat tteokbokki_ , and they’d be discussing it during the weekend. “After going along with this… with Junnie and everything. I was… worried that you might do something cheesy.”

Mingyu was halfway taking off his shirt and he stopped, heart beating fast in his chest.

 _Cheesy_ , that sounded a lot like…

“What would I do?” He asked, pretending not to be bothered by the question, instead putting on his pajama and getting into the bed.

His hands were _not_ sweating as he did so.

“Like proposing me or something.” Minghao commented, sounding like he was mildly annoyed, but Mingyu knew that it was his way of showing how fond he was.

Mingyu gave him a small smile, suddenly worried about how obvious he had been.

How Minghao might have, or might have not, noticed the small ring box he carried around in his pocket.

Everyday, for a year now.

Was he an idiot?

Probably yes, but only for Xu Minghao.

“I wouldn’t dare.” Mingyu commented quickly, reaching out to turn off Minghao’s lamp.

Okay, he had been saved! For now.

Saved by the bell (the lamp).

The room went dark in the blink of an eye and Minghao let out a small noise of complaint, Mingyu’s weight still pressing him down.

“ _Hey,_  I was planning to read this.” Minghao whined, trying to release his arm and book, trapped against Mingyu’s chest and his own now. “Get off of me, you big doofus.”

Mingyu laughed a little, eyes adjusting to the dark just enough to reach out and place a kiss on Minghao’s jaw.

Then he came back to his side of the bed, smiling still playing at his lips.

“Goodnight, Hao.” He whispered.

He waited a little, recognizing the sounds of Minghao shifting and leaving his book and specs on the bedside table.

He waited a little more and arms circled his waist, Minghao’s chest pressing against his back.

“Goodnight, Mingyu.”

(“You still awake?” Minghao whispered, words tickling against the back of Mingyu’s neck.

Half an hour had passed, and Mingyu still didn’t feel sleepy, although he was exhausted.

There was just… something in the back of his mind.

“Yeah.” He confirmed, eyes fixed on the opposite wall. He wouldn’t have dared to ask this if he weren’t half asleep or facing Minghao, but… “When I ask…”

Minghao took a deep breath, squeezing lightly at the point where they were holding hands, just over Mingyu’s chest.

“When you ask.” He repeated.

Good, so they both knew what they were talking about.

_like proposing me_

“Will you say yes?” Mingyu asked, not being able to hide the tremor on his voice, his heart was beating wild in his chest.

The answer came right away, accompanied with a small press of lips against his shoulder.

“I will.”)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, thank you for reading. 
> 
> Not going to lie, I've been kind of struggling with my writing lately, so I'm really happy to be able to share this with you <3 I hope you like it. I've been meaning to write more about Junhui and Gyuhao, so I'm really glad I did (it wasn't ready for Junhui's birthday, but better late than never, right?)


	6. Yoon family/Supermarket

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Yoon family goes grocery shopping.

“... vegetables, oh, _toothpaste_ , baby, we cannot forget the toothpaste, also Channie ran out of- _hey_ , Cheol, are you writing it all down?” 

As Seungcheol turned off the hair dryer to properly listen to what seemed to be his husband _talking_ to him, Chan was already standing up, ready to sprint (he doesn’t like _getting warm air on his head!_ ). 

“What? Han, can’t hear you! I was- _wait_ , Channie! Your hair is still wet!” He said, but the five year old was already running downstairs yelling _thank you appa!_  

Seungcheol heaved a sigh. 

This kid, he hoped he wouldn’t get a cold over this. 

The house was always a mess when _five_ people needed to get ready to go out, _and_ three of them were children. 

Although Wonwoo was old enough to do everything by himself, Jeonghan still needed to remind him not to get too engrossed into reading instead of eating his breakfast, and Seungkwan took a _lot_ of time to choose his outfit (it was only grocery shopping day, but Seungcheol guessed that the world was a runway... for some people). 

And Channie, well… Channie still needed their help in lots of things, but they didn’t mind. 

Both of them (especially Jeonghan, if you asked Seungcheol) liked to coddle their youngest and they’d do it until they could (forever). 

Which is why Seungcheol still followed the youngest downstairs, to make sure that he’d be ready to leave soon. 

“Cheol,” Jeonghan called, voice coming from somewhere around the second floor. “Are the kids ready?”

Seungcheol took only _one_ glance to the living room to know the answer. 

Wonwoo was missing like two sweaters on him, since it was chilly outside and Jeonghan always ended up lending his to their eldest (then Seungcheol would hand over his own to Jeonghan). 

Seungkwan was halfway eating his breakfast. 

Chan was jumping up and down on the couch, refusing to wear his _nice clothes_ to go out. 

… 

Were the kids ready…? 

0/3. 

“... Sure thing.” Seungcheol mumbled to himself more than to Jeonghan, smiling despite himself at their chaotic family. “We’ll be ready in five!” 

***

As soon as they set foot in the supermarket, all of them dispersed. 

Wonwoo went to get the all the dairy products, Seungkwan to pick dessert, Jeonghan to get some ingredients for today’s lunch (Saturday’s it was on him, Sunday’s on Seungcheol), and finally Seungcheol stayed with Chan. 

Ever since they had adopted the kids, and they needed to do grocery shopping, they’d always end up giving them some tasks, because buying enough food for a family of _five_ tended to get boring after a while.

This way, the kids would be a little more independent, and they’d learn to handle prices (and money, hypothetically). 

And it gave Jeonghan and Seungcheol some time to leisurely wander through the aisles too. 

(Without three kids asking every three minutes _are we nearly done yet?_ )

Grocery shopping wasn’t exactly _fun_ , if you asked Seungcheol, but it needed to be done, and it was best if they all did it as a family. 

Sometimes Wonwoo needed things for his school projects, Seungkwan for drama club, and well… they couldn’t possibly leave Chan at home, so of course the five of them would end up doing it together. 

Wonwoo liked helping with grocery shopping. 

He was thorough, responsible and all in all, particularly diligent about this kind of task, so Seungcheol and Jeonghan didn’t even double checked when Wonwoo left all the products of his assigned list on the shopping cart, because they knew that their eldest had done well. 

As for Seungkwan, he liked to help, but he got distracted easily, so he wouldn’t have as many things on his list as Wonwoo. 

Which was perfectly fine, because Seungkwan was still nine, while Wonwoo was about to turn twelve. 

As for today, Seungkwan had only one task: dessert. 

(Jeonghan and Seungcheol did tell him to pick something with a healthy amount of sugar on it, because there was a _whole_ weekend ahead of them, and they didn’t want the kids to be hyperactive and high on sugar). 

And lastly Chan… Well, Chan would usually have two moods on this grocery shopping extravaganza. 

One: Excited, going through the _whole_ toy section. _Appa, can I have this, please_?

Two: Drowsy, slightly grumpy, napping on the cart as they shopped.

Today it was the latter. 

Seungcheol watched his husband and two of his kids leave to roam through the aisles and he smiled down at Chan, the five year old was all curled up on himself on the shopping cart, already dozing off. 

“Just you and me, Channie.” Seungcheol whispered, pulling out his phone, where he had written part of the list for today’s shopping adventure. The youngest didn’t reply, just looked adorably oblivious to all the noise and chatter around them. Seungcheol’s smile grew wider. “Let’s do this.” 

***

Okay. 

Dessert. 

 _Not_ a lot of sugar, but _yes_ , it could be sweet. 

(Were there any desserts that _weren’t_ sweet? Seungkwan would ask Uncle Mingyu later, he knew all about food). 

Seungkwan only managed to roam around the supermarket for a few minutes, until his feet guided him to the pastry area. 

He knew this part like the back of his hand, and they _always_ came to shop to the same store, but last month Seungkwan had to pick the vegetables (boo, _boring!_ ) so even though the cakes looked _delicious_ right there, displayed behind the glass, Seungkwan wasn’t allowed to pick one. 

( _Although_ Wonwoo-hyung had picked dessert last month and it had been chocolate ice cream, so that wasn’t _so_ bad.) 

The important thing today, however, was that _he_ would be able to pick whatever he wanted. 

Well… not whatever, it’d be weird if he chose pizza for today’s dessert. 

His eyes roamed around the neat row of pastries and his mouth watered a little (he didn’t finish his cereal, although he told Seungcheol-appa that he had, shhh). Next time he’d take _less_ time to get dressed and _more_ time to eat. 

That was a lesson he had learned. 

But back to the topic in hand! 

He had a cake to choose. 

(He had made up his mind as soon as Jeonghan-appa told him he’d be picking dessert for today). 

He had a _flavor_ to choose. 

Okay, options.

There was chocolate (perfect, but maybe too much sugar?), matcha (the green thingy? _no_ ), vanilla (what’s with the baby blue icing? That looked awful), moka (Seungcheol-appa let him have a sip of coffee once and _ugh_ ), red velvet (what was that supposed to taste like…? Seungkwan didn’t want to find out today) and finally… strawberry. 

Just a regular strawberry cake. 

Jeonghan-appa _loved_ strawberries. 

And everything strawberry flavored. 

(Not more than he loved Seungcheol-appa though, because they had that talk once and Seungcheol-appa wanted to make sure). 

“Can I help you with something?” Someone asked and Seungkwan was so engrossed with the different flavors and possible choices that he forgot he had been staring at the cake display for like five minutes now. 

(It happened to him, more often than not, it was his way of focusing). 

“No, thank you.” Seungkwan said, after a moment. The person, lady, behind the counter gave him a curious glance. “Appa told me to pick dessert for today.” He added with a toothy grin, just because. 

He liked when his parents gave him responsibilities. 

It made him feel independent and cherished.

“Oh, I see.” 

There was a beat of (slightly awkward) silence and then Seungkwan confidently pointed at the strawberry cake. 

“Can I have that, please?” 

“You sure you can carry it?” The lady behind the counter asked, with a worrisome expression on her face. 

Seungkwan puffed out his cheeks, pouting a little. 

He was _big_ , not Wonwoo-hyung _big,_ but certainly big (and responsible) enough to carry a cake! 

“Yes, I can. I’ve carried a lot of stuff before.” He assured her, and it was the truth. 

He had carried Chan when he was a baby, and Chan was _the_ most important in the whole universe! 

(And he hadn’t dropped him). 

Of _course_ he could carry a cake. 

Easy peasy. 

And he must have looked trustworthy enough, because after a considerable amount of time, the lady decided to pull out the cake, wrap it out really nicely, and she finally handed it over (with care). 

“Thank you so much.” Seungkwan bowed as he received it, heading to meet with Wonwoo-hyung now. 

This was easy! 

Maybe he could be like Jeonghan-appa next time and pick the _whole_ lunch. 

He could totally do it. 

Jeonghan-appa and Seungcheol-appa would be proud!

***

“Hi.” 

Wonwoo slowly turned to the familiar voice, a bunch of low fat yogurt on his hands as he stared.

That was Seunghee.

One of his classmates. 

(She was _the_ most popular girl of his grade and she had lots of friends too). 

[And no, Wonwoo was not included on that list].

However, when it was clear that it was impossible for Wonwoo to wave to say hello (why did they even need all of these?), Seunghee awkwardly stepped forward. 

“Do you need me to help you carry those?” She offered, smiling sweetly as if it weren’t a strange thing to meet outside the school in one random supermarket aisle? 

Wonwoo thought it was strange.

Especially because he had never _ever_ ran into a classmate outside school. 

Not by accident. 

(He had a book club of some sorts, but that wasn’t accidental at all). 

It wasn’t _that_ weird that Seunghee said _hi_ to him, because she did, every morning, and then she’d say _bye_ every afternoon ( _duh_ ). 

The weird thing was how Wonwoo felt slightly awkward around her, as if he didn’t know what to do with himself. 

Which is why, he had confidently replied _no, thanks, I’m good_ , when he clearly _wasn’t_ , and he should have brought a shopping cart with himself to carry all the things he was supposed to buy.

At Seunghee’s slightly disappointed expression, Wonwoo internally scolded himself. 

Why did he even say no? The circumstances were weird, but he could have used the help. 

Why wouldn’t his mouth catch up with his brain? 

“Um, so are you here with your parents?” Seunghee asked, and Wonwoo nodded, dumbly. 

Do eleven year olds shop by themselves? Maybe they do, but certainly they don’t need this insane amount of yogurt. 

“Yeah.” 

Silence fell between them. 

Wonwoo shifted his weight from one foot to another and stared at the ground for a second. 

What was he supposed to say? They didn’t even talk to each other in school. 

They weren’t even friends or anything… 

“Sorry,” Seunghee said suddenly, and just _now_ Wonwoo noticed how red her face was. Maybe she was coming down with something. “It’s just that I saw you and we never talk in school, and I thought that maybe we could talk now. But I don’t know what to talk about, even though I’d like to talk to you more. Now I’m probably making it all weird…” 

Her words died down in the end, and Wonwoo didn’t miss the way she looked down, playing with her hands. 

“I just…” Wonwoo started, not knowing what to say next. This was _so_ weird. 

“Maybe we could sit next to each other at lunch?” She rushed, before Wonwoo could continue, and to be honest Wonwoo was grateful for the interruption, because he was speechless. “You’re always with Minhyun, aren’t you? We could all sit together next time.” 

Oh. 

That was right. 

Maybe she wanted to be friends with Minhyun. 

That made sense. 

Minhyun was nice. 

“Yeah… right.” Wonwoo nodded, trying a smile. “I’ll tell him that.” 

Seunghee’s smile fell a little, and Wonwoo had no idea why, but he didn’t have time to dwell on it either, because a yell interrupted his thoughts. 

“Hyung, we have to meet with appa now!” Seungkwan’s voice was loud and clear, and Wonwoo turned to find his baby brother on the end of the aisle, holding what looked like a strawberry cake. 

(Jeonghan-appa would be delighted). 

“Seungkwannie, don’t yell in the supermarket.” He chastised gently and when he turned to say goodbye to Seunghee, he noticed she had already scurried off and she was leaving already, mumbling a quick _bye Wonwoo_ at him. 

Wonwoo frowned a little, this whole interaction had been the weirdest and he really didn’t understand what had just happened. 

When Seungkwan finally arrived to his side, he gave Wonwoo a nudge (actually, the cake did) on the shoulder. 

“Hyung, that was Seunghee-noona, wasn’t she?” Seungkwan asked, although he already had a knowing smile on his lips. Wonwoo dreaded his next words a little. "She likes you, hyung. Just in case you weren't sure about it." 

Wonwoo's cheeks warmed up, looking everywhere but his brother. 

He was _nine!_ Why would he even suggest that?

“You’re _nine_ , why would you even suggest that?” Wonwoo asked, scandalized by his brother’s suggestion.

It was impossible, Seunghee didn’t like him.

That’d be strange.

They didn’t even know each other. 

Wonwoo bet she liked Minhyun, since she always seemed to be staring at him… whenever they were together. 

“I’m telling you, hyung. She’s always looking at you!” 

“Oh my God, Seungkwan, shush!” Wonwoo nudged him, cheeks burning. He _loved_ his baby brother, but if he could just shut up right now, that’d be swell. “She could still be out there.”

“Aw, hyung, you’re all red, you realized you liked her! Why won't you be friends then? Or maybe...” Seungkwan cheered, clapping his hands. “Seunghee and Wonwoo, sitting in a tree~!” 

Oh. 

 _No_. 

“I’ll tell on you to Jeonghan-appa!” Wonwoo never played that card, but it was necessary now. 

This was _so_ embarrassing, it wasn’t fair. 

“Ah, no, wait. Hyung, I was only joking!” But Wonwoo was already leaving, and Seungkwan chased him, both of them bickering with each other the whole way until they met with Jeonghan. 

***

Jeonghan wasn’t a very good cook.

All of them knew that, and of course over the years, Jeonghan had definitely improved, but… he was still lacking in that area.

So even though they had come to the arrangement that he’d cook on Saturday’s, most of them they’d end up ordering takeaway, or having lunch at Mingyu’s or Jihoon’s.

Even though he _usually_ didn’t cook, he knew no one minded because his food wasn’t good at all. 

Except for _one_ dish.

He eyed around the whole pasta section, until his eyes landed on one variety in particular. 

Spaghetti. 

(Chan’s favorite and his own too). 

There was something special about eating pasta and Jeonghan had decided to cook it today for a reason.

(Not just because he had to).

But today… it might have been silly, but today marked an anniversary of some sorts.

The first proper date they both had, when Seungcheol had cooked him _pasta_. 

They had been only seventeen year olds back then and Seungcheol had remembered how Jeonghan had said he’d like his date to cook him pasta, so Seungcheol had. 

The result? It had been disgusting. 

All sticky, and chewy. 

But Jeonghan had eaten it anyways, enjoyed it even. 

Now that _years_ had passed, and Jeonghan had the chance to think back at that small moment in their lives, he realized he might have fallen for Seungcheol, right there, in that precise moment and that was certainly worth celebrating, even if Seungcheol had forgotten the exact date, but Jeonghan remembered, he always did and- 

Loud chatter interrupted his thoughts and he turned, his eyes recognizing that those were _his_ noisy children, and they were coming his way, as fast as they could, apparently.

When words finally started to register, Jeonghan realized they were probably bickering. 

(They did that a lot, lately, but it was okay, it was all friendly banter). 

“Appa, Seungkwan is mocking me, because-”

“Appa, I was only saying the truth, it’s so obvious, but hyung can’t see it!”

As soon as Wonwoo and Seungkwan got in front of him, both of them started to point to each other accusingly, Wonwoo’s ears were red in embarrassment (something he shared with Cheol whenever he got shy) and Seungkwan only looked pouty, arms precariously holding a strawberry cake.

(Had his baby picked that for him? If he had, Jeonghan might cry). 

“Appa, tell him that he needs to stop doing that, it’s so embarrassing!” 

“I didn’t do anything, appa, I was just trying to help, because-” 

Jeonghan smiled at the situation, he had just been thinking about Cheol and anniversaries and first dates, but…

There was no time to dwell on the past now, huh? The present was right _here._

Jeonghan smiled fondly at his children.

This was the life that he had chosen and he wouldn’t want it any other way.

“Okay, one at a time, what happened?”

***

Even though all _five_ of them had just rounded up to drop all the groceries on Seungcheol’s cart (and Seungcheol was already on the check out section, Jeonghan, Wonwoo and Seungkwan had disappeared. 

Again.

Apparently Seungkwan had forgotten he needed paint and brushes to finish some props for the next school play, and Wonwoo had said he’d pick some candies to buy with his own money (he liked to treat his baby brothers, _yes_ , best hyung of the year) and Jeonghan had forgotten the garlic for _something_ he’d cook for lunch. 

It was a surprise, and Seungcheol was a little giddy about it. 

Jeonghan, Wonwoo and Seungkwan leaving wasn’t a problem in itself, but it became one when Seungcheol found himself in front of the register, with an upset Chan tugging at his sleeve (an _asshole_ had pushed his cart against his own, and Chan had woken up with a start) and with the cashier signalling him to pay like _right now_. 

(There was a long line, and Seungcheol had missed it until now). 

“Appa, pick me up, appa, appa, _appa._ ” Chan kept his insistent tug on Seungcheol’s shirt, but Seungcheol _already_ had his hands full with Jeonghan’s wallet and phone and his _own_ wallet and phone, besides Wonwoo’s bag and Seungkwan’s- “ _Appa!"_  Chan wailed, voice breaking as he stopped his efforts to get Seungcheol’s attention, instead deciding to cover his reddening face as he started to cry. 

Then of course, the inevitable happened. 

People started _whispering._  

_oh my, why won’t he just pick up the poor boy_

_parents these days_

_i would have never let my son to put up a show like that_

“Baby, please just wait a sec, appa has to pay-” 

But Chan was already dissolving into tears and Seungcheol couldn’t bear to see him like that so he dropped (yes, _dropped)_  everything on the counter and quickly picked him up, kissing his tear stained cheeks.

He was weak for him, yes, he knew. 

“Oh, baby, I’m right here.” Seungcheol reminded him, because the thing that bothered Chan the most was waking up suddenly and feeling all alone. 

It was something they had been working on, ever since they adopted Chan, but they were still getting there. 

It was a long process, and Seungcheol would be patient and loving through it. 

Seungcheol was just trying to figure out _how_ to pay with his hands full of their youngest when he felt a gentle pat on his lower back.

He didn’t even need to turn to know it was Jeonghan and his perfect timing on situations like these. 

“Hey, baby, Jeonghan-appa is here, want me to-yes, there you go.” Seungcheol said, kissing him one last time and passing Chan over to his husband. 

As soon as Chan was safely on his dad’s arms, Jeonghan gently brushed the hair from his eyes, pulling out a tissue from his pocket to blow Chan’s nose. 

“We’re right here, Channie.” Jeonghan whispered, rubbing the kid’s back up and down in a soothing manner. Chan gently started to play with the hair on Jeonghan’s nape, breath getting steadier each time. “What is it, baby?” Jeonghan asked, after a few minutes, when Chan looked calmer enough to respond. 

As Seungcheol kept bowing to the cashier and customers for slowing down the line, he caught a glimpse of the interaction, where Chan mumbled out his small and broken _i was upset_ and _i wanted appa to pick me up._

Seungcheol had always his husband’s ability to deal with Chan’s tantrums. 

Because even though Chan might seem upset, and inconsolable, truth was that Jeonghan always managed to pull him out of it and talk things through.  

Luckily for Seungcheol, Seungkwan and Wonwoo arrived at the last minute, adding _more_ things to their growing check, and as Jeonghan carried their youngest to the parking lot, Wonwoo paid for the candies for his brothers with his own money, and Seungkwan made polite friendly small talk with the cashier, Seungcheol couldn’t help but to smile fondly at sight. 

This was his _family._

It wasn’t perfect, but Seungcheol loved all of them _so much._

Now it had been more than an hour since they had arrived to the supermarket, but if Seungcheol remembered correctly they hadn’t forgotten anything, which was a victory on its own. 

And getting _all_ those groceries in the car proved to be a little challenging, but Seungcheol had spent a good part of his childhood playing tetris, so his efforts paid off when he managed to fit all three kids into the backseat and all the groceries on the trunk. 

Jeonghan was buckling up Chan on his car seat, when Seungcheol approached to him again. 

The boy looked definitely calmer, his cheeks red and his eyes puffy, but he didn’t look as upset as before anymore. 

“Such a good boy, there you are.” Jeonghan praised, peppering the youngest’s face with kisses, causing him to giggle in delight. (He was also chewing one of the gummy bears Wonwoo had bought for him, so Seungcheol thought he might be happy about that too). “Have anything to say to appa, baby?” 

Jeonghan’s voice was gentle, and he never stopped caressing Chan’s hair, his cheeks. 

He was such a good parent and Seungcheol was amazed by him every day.

Chan seemed a little embarrassed, but Seungcheol didn’t comment on it, just leaned down, to be at eye-level with him. 

One of the first parenting lessons Jeonghan had taught him and it worked _so_ well. 

“Appa, sorry I yelled at you.” Chan mumbled out, mouth twisting into pout. 

Seungcheol’s heart warmed up at that. 

“Apology accepted, baby.” Seungcheol told him, pressing a kiss on the top of his head. "Appa is right here for you, okay? Next time I'll hold your hand and then I'll pick you up okay? Sorry if I made you feel lonely, I needed to pay for our groceries." 

Chan gave him a toothy grin and nodded and Seungcheol pinched his cheeks, getting a small  _appa!_ in protest. 

Adorable. 

And they were finally all good to go. 

As Seungcheol fixed his rear view mirror, however, his eyes landed on their eldest, who was clearly sulking a little against the window, his cheeks burning. 

"Wonwoo-yah, you okay?" Seungcheol asked, just in case, but Wonwoo only drowned himself more into his oversized sweater, hiding his blush.

Okay, that was weird. 

"He's more than fine!" Seungkwan assured him, with a playful smile and Seungcheol had absolutely no idea what was going on between the two. "Otherwise ask Seung-" 

"Seungkwannie." 

"Sorry, Jeonghan-appa." He said (not looking sorry at all), but albeit a little sheepishly and Seungcheol turned to his husband with a confused frown. 

Jeonghan only patted his thigh, mouthing a  _later_ that all of the kids missed, and put on his sunglasses, eyes focused on the road. 

Seungcheol was still confused, but he figured he could wait until they got home. 

He turned to the backseat to make sure all the kids had their seat belts on, then checked Jeonghan's (just in case), and brought his husband's hand to his lips, to press a kiss against his knuckles, getting a warm smile from Jeonghan in response. 

"Okay, let's go home."

***

The rest of the afternoon was spent in some school work for the boys, Jeonghan and Seungcheol putting away the groceries, then a quick lunch, then movie time (they re-watched Shrek, for some reason both Seungkwan and Chan loved it to death), then they (adults and kids) might have or might have not napped on the couch until dinner time. 

Then it was time to bed. 

Seungcheol was playing a game on his phone, feeling particularly drained to go and put on pajamas, when he heard a _groan_ coming from the bathroom. 

Seungcheol was up in a second, phone forgotten on his bed, as he headed to their shared bathroom with a worrisome expression on his face. 

“Baby, are you okay? What is it?” 

Jeonghan was doubled over the sink, and Seungcheol didn’t know if he was in pain or laughing. 

“What did I say Seungcheol?” He asked, with an edge on his tone, Seungcheol couldn’t see his face, but he knew that _that_ tone meant trouble. 

Oh God, what did Seungcheol even do? What did he forget? 

“We only had to buy _one_ essential thing today.” Jeonghan gritted the words out, holding his toothbrush tightly on his hand and- 

Oh. 

_Oh._

_cheol, don’t forget the toothpaste, did you write it down? (i don’t need to write it down,_ Seungcheol had confidently said _, of course i’ll remember!), are you sure, cheol, because you always forget (i don’t always forget!!) if you think you’re going to win me over with_ that _pout, mister, you’re-_

“Oops.” 

Jeonghan frowned, dropping his toothbrush on the sink. 

“Well, you’re heading down to the convenience store to buy some.” Jeonghan said, with a scoff, crossing his arms against his chest. 

It was Seungcheol’s turn to pout now. 

“But, baby, it’s so cold and it’s so late and I’m so tired.” He whined. 

He _did_ forget, but that didn’t mean _he_ had to go out, it was like eleven pm, and Jeonghan looked all soft and it made Seungcheol want to tuck him into bed and make out. 

“Ugh, I married a child.” Jeonghan rolled his eyes, a playful expression on his face, but Seungcheol looked undeterred, walking towards him, with a smile of his own. 

“I’m sorry, Han.” 

Jeonghan sighed a little. 

“It’s okay I forgot too.” He admitted, and Seungcheol just hummed, closing the bathroom door and locking it. “What are you doing?” He asked. 

Truth was, Jeonghan knew _exactly_ what that look on Seungcheol’s face meant, but he loved to hear his husband say it anyway. 

“Making it up to you.” Seungcheol said innocently.

But Jeonghan wouldn't give it to him that easily, just because he liked to tease him.

“How am I supposed to have sex with you when your breath reeks of pasta?” 

“I don’t know, guess we’ll find out.” Seungcheol said seductively, backing down Jeonghan against the bathroom counter until his husband took the hint and hopped on it, letting Seungcheol settle between his open legs. 

“You’re disgusting.” Jeonghan said, without heat, as Seungcheol pressed his lips against his neck. 

“Am I?” Seungcheol wrapped his arms around Jeonghan’s waist, pulling him impossibly closer. He was warm and he was _home_ and Seungcheol loved the reminder. “Then why did you cook me pasta, hm? Especially today?” 

_Shit, he noticed._

Jeonghan blushed bright red at Seungcheol’s suggestive tone, and he hid on the crook of his husband’s neck. 

“You’re such a romantic on the inside,” Seungcheol whispered, clearly enjoying this too much. Jeonghan hated him a little at the moment. “And such a bad cook on the outside.” He added, with mirth. 

The response was immediate, and Seungcheol groaned when he received a slap on the chest. 

Ah, Jeonghan was _so_ cute when he was embarrassed. 

Seungcheol adored him. 

(And adored making him embarrassed too). 

“You’re so ungrateful.” Jeonghan whispered, his cheeks burning, his heart beating overtime. They had been together for _years_ , but Seungcheol still managed to get him all hot and bothered in a snap of his fingers. He was _dangerous_ for Jeonghan’s health to be honest. 

“I’m the most grateful,” Seungcheol assured him, pressing a kiss against Jeonghan’s parted lips. “I got you, didn’t I?” 

_Ugh._

Damn. 

He was so- 

Perfect, thoughtful. 

Jeonghan couldn’t help himself, and he pressed his lips against Seungcheol’s warm cheek, enjoying the way Seungcheol turned at the last moment and captured his lips on a proper kiss. 

(And well, Seungcheol might have or might have not pulled back just enough to whisper an _i love you_ against Jeonghan’s lips, and Jeonghan might have or might have not responded with an _i love you more._

The rest of the night was history.)

 

The day came to an end soon after that, and for once, Seungcheol thought that grocery shopping day wasn’t _that_ boring after all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I MISSED YOU ALL SO MUCH, DID YOU MISS ME?  
> This family is back with a (small) but fluffy update, hope you like it! <3


	7. Chan/Swimming lessons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seungcheol and Jeonghan try to teach Chan how to swim (+ Soonyoung dwells on his parenting skills).

“Appa, please, please, please, _please_.” 

No, they weren’t going to the dentist, or the doctor, or to school. 

“I don’t wanna, please, please, _please_.” 

Anyone would think they were _killing_ the poor child since the wails could be heard all the way from the parking lot to the swimming pool. 

 _Yes_ , they were going swimming. 

Not the _scariest_ activity, but it certainly was to Chan apparently. 

Wonwoo’s cheeks were pink from embarrassment, since today of all days, it was _crowded_ on the way there (they had rented a private one for this once, but the lockers and hallways were _full_ of judging stares), Seungkwan was mostly unbothered, making silly faces so Chan would laugh, but to no avail. 

The just turned six year old was _devastated_. 

He was literally clinging to Jeonghan’s arms as if his life depended on it. 

They were _just_ swimming lessons, but apparently Chan thought they’d throw him into the ocean (full of sharks) without a life jacket. 

If you asked Jeonghan, people would be thinking, _why would you make him go to swimming lessons if he seemed scared to death? Why would you be so mean?_

But truth was, they had been trying this for over a year now. 

Chan’s next school year would include different activities and clubs, and one of the things in that list was _swimming club_.

Which wouldn’t be an issue at all, if only Chan knew how to swim. 

Nope, scratch that, if only Chan weren’t absolutely _terrified_ to swim. 

He didn’t even dare to come near the water. 

When they went to Jeju in the beginning of the year, Chan had only managed to go near the water, because Seungcheol carried him on his shoulders, as the boy literally clung to his dad’s head. 

(And as soon as the water level reached Seungcheol’s waist, Chan cried until they got out). 

“Appa, I don’t want to, I don’t wanna, please, please, _please_.” Chan wailed hiding in Jeonghan’s chest as he wept. 

Jeonghan only tried not to sigh. 

Oh, this was going to be _such_ a long day. 

When Jeonghan and Seungcheol had decided to be parents, they had implicitly agreed on a couple things. 

They both despised those parents that pushed their own interests on their kids, or that let them _cry it out_ when the kids would make a tantrum in a store. 

They were also against physical punishment. 

And they didn’t exactly like the idea of making their kids go through things they knew would cause them stress. 

Like this particular situation. 

It’s not like they _wanted_ Chan to learn how to swim like this, (they’d rather it’d be a less traumatizing experience for the youngest), but he’d start going to school soon, and he’d have to go to the swimming club, and considering how Chan acted around the whole swimming thing, Jeonghan and Seungcheol decided they’d rather teach him themselves. 

They couldn’t imagine a teacher trying to get the six year old into the water without someone getting incredibly distressed on the process. 

(This could mean Chan, but the teacher as well). 

All in all, their goal for today was to (at least) get Chan to dislike the water a little less. 

Swimming and paddling and _submerging_ were too ambitious goals to have today. 

If Chan managed to get into the water without _crying_ or _fussing_ , Jeonghan and Seungcheol would be ready to call it a day. 

(They still had two months or so to actually _teach_ him how to swim). 

Small goals, little by little. 

It shouldn’t be _that_ hard. 

“Appa, I don’t want to. No, no, no, _no_.” 

...

In theory. 

“Baby, we’ve talked about this,” Jeonghan reminded him gently, rubbing Chan’s back up and down. Seungcheol gave him a concerned look, and Jeonghan knew what it meant. 

 _Is this really going to work?_  

Not that they didn’t trust the youngest, but… maybe they had dragged this swimming extravaganza way too long and now Chan was even more scared to try it. 

They should have taught him as he was young… well, not like they could do anything about that now. 

The damage was done. 

The sound of Seungcheol dropping their bags on their assigned changing room pulled Chan out of his hiding spot (Jeonghan’s chest) and as soon as his eyes met with Seungcheol’s, Seungcheol wanted to call this off. 

The boy looked absolutely _devastated_ , he looked feverish from so much crying, his hands trembling as he held onto Jeonghan’s shirt. 

In the meantime, Wonwoo and Seungkwan were quietly watching, holding their swimming equipment and clothing awkwardly, not knowing what to do.

It made Seungcheol’s heart ache, because all of them had taken their morning off for this, and he definitely didn’t want to ruin this whole experience for Wonwoo and Seungkwan, because they deserved to have some fun too. 

There was nothing to be afraid of and Seungcheol and Jeonghan would make sure to teach Chan that today. 

It’d be difficult, yes. 

Chan would suffer through it all, probably. 

But they _had_ to. 

They’d be together, as they did all the time, and hopefully things would turn out okay. 

By the time Seungcheol assured Wonwoo and Seungkwan that they’d handle everything and that they should get ready and change, Chan’s crying had subdued, enough for Jeonghan to help him through the motions of changing into his swimwear. 

Seungcheol made sure to distract Chan, bouncing him up and down on his hip as Jeonghan changed and in a matter of minutes, all five of them were ready to get into the water. 

(Chan was still clinging to Seungcheol as his life depended on it, but they’d work on that later). 

“Okay,” Jeonghan took a deep breath, and gave all of his three children and husband a warm smile. There was no need to start with the wrong foot. “Let’s do this.” 

***

“Appa, is Channie going to be okay?” 

Seungcheol’s eyes left the edge of the pool, where his husband and youngest were currently sitting at, and instead turned to Wonwoo, who was sitting on the shallowest part of the swimming pool. 

Their eldest wasn’t too fond of swimming or the beach, mostly because he got cold easily, but the water was at a nice temperature, so Seungcheol figured that Wonwoo was enjoying himself more today. 

He could hear Seungkwan splashing around, playing with his Frozen themed bodyboard (Christmas’ gift from Uncle Mingyu). 

Seungcheol took a moment to reply, regretting it right away, because Wonwoo’s expression fell, looking even more worried than before. 

“He’s going to be okay.” Seungcheol said quickly, walking towards him to place a hand on his shoulder. 

He was slightly cold, but he looked like he was having fun so Seungcheol wouldn’t tell him anything about it. 

“Mm,” Wonwoo’s eyes stayed glued to his dad and youngest brother though, the boy firmly curled up on Jeonghan’s lap, not even letting his toes touch the water. 

They could even hear Jeonghan’s comforting words towards him, but Chan was still not letting go. 

The thing with Wonwoo was that he was already thirteen. 

There was no way he could be fooled by these explanations. 

So Seungcheol gave him another smile, more tired this time, and tilted his chin up, so he’d look at him instead of Jeonghan and Chan. 

His baby boy was all grown up, he couldn’t possibly lie to him. 

(He was having a hard time getting used to the fact that Wonwoo understood almost _everything_ now, and he was so smart, but Seungcheol still wanted to teach him more). 

“Remember when you were little, when you had just arrived with us and storms made you scared?” 

“ _Appa_ ,” Wonwoo’s cheeks reddened, clearly embarrassed at the reminder.

Seungcheol found it adorable. 

“I’m not saying it to embarrass you, bud. We’re all afraid of something.” He assured him right away, caressing his son’s cheek and then finally letting go. “The thing is… you were afraid of storms before, but are you afraid of them now?” 

The boy hummed in thought, fixing his specs. 

“Not really.” 

“Exactly.” Seungcheol said, eyes focusing on Jeonghan and Chan again. “Sometimes we face our fears and they leave, and sometimes it’s hard, and it takes a while. But Channie hasn’t tried swimming, I think he’ll only be afraid at first, and then he’ll realize, there’s nothing to be afraid of.” 

There was a small silence, and Wonwoo looked at Seungkwan, who was happily (attempting) to bodyboard from one side of the pool to another. 

“What… what if he doesn’t, appa? What if he stays afraid for a long time?” Wonwoo asked and _damn_ , he was getting smarter every day. 

Sometimes Seungcheol didn’t know what to respond to his inquiries. 

Right now it was one of the occasions Seungcheol wished Jeonghan was right here to help him through this. 

“If he doesn’t, then we’ll just be there for him.” Seungcheol said in the end, not knowing if that was enough of an answer to the thirteen year old, but hoping it would be. “It’s okay to be afraid sometimes, but… we don’t want him to live in fear of doing stuff, Wonnie, we need to show him that. The world is a place where-” 

“Appa, come on, let’s race!! We’re already on the start line!” Seungkwan yelled and just _then_ Seungcheol noticed that somewhere around his deep explanation, Seungkwan had called Wonwoo over and they were now fooling around, getting ready to begin a race. 

Seungcheol couldn’t help but smile at the sight. 

 _Yes_ , Wonwoo was growing up too fast and Seungkwan too, and there were a lot of things coming for them and Seungcheol sometimes got overwhelmed by all the things he couldn’t control, of everything he didn’t know and couldn’t teach them. 

But… seeing them splash water at each other and laugh about it, made Seungcheol think that maybe he still had a little more time not to worry. 

(Just a little). 

“Coming!! Don’t start without me!” 

***

“On the count of three, okay?” 

“No.” 

“Come on, baby.” 

“No, no, no.” Chan’s voice wavered and he had _just_ stopped crying, but he looked like he was about to start again. 

“Look at appa, Channie. He’s right there to catch you.” Jeonghan assured him, trying not to let his tone show how exhausted he was.

Almost three hours had passed since they had arrived to the pool and Chan still hadn’t touched the water. 

Seungkwan and Wonwoo and Seungcheol had managed to play around, swim and have some fun, but it was hard to do so knowing that the youngest member of the family was extremely upset. 

Seungcheol was waiting by the pool now, with open arms, so Chan would jump in, and Jeonghan was standing on the edge, holding Chan to his chest. 

“Channie, look, Wonwoo-hyung and Seungkwan-hyung are right there, by your appa’s side. It’s not that deep, is it? Nothing bad is going to happen, I promise.” 

“Appa, no. P-please.” Chan clung to him, arms and legs wrapped tight around Jeonghan’s lean frame. 

Okay. 

What to do.

Should they call it a day? 

Jeonghan glanced in the kids’ direction and noticed how they looked kind of exhausted already. Besides, their time was running out and the kids had to go back to school for the rest of the afternoon. 

Seungcheol was trying to hide it too, but he was actually getting cold, the tip of his nose turning a little blue. 

Clearly all of them were trying their best, Seungkwan and Wonwoo kept encouraging Chan and Seungcheol had already went up and tried to get him to jump into the pool at least once, but to no avail. 

This mission seemed to have failed and even though Jeonghan didn’t want to admit it, he was a little frustrated with himself. 

He felt like they had tried _everything_ already so Chan wouldn’t be afraid, and it still didn’t work. 

Where were they failing?

Did they need to do more? Or should they stop trying?

How would this affect Chan if they pushed a little more or if they backed away now?

“Want to give it a go?” Jeonghan asked in a whisper, deciding to give it another go, but there was no response, only heavy breathing coming from Chan. 

Jeonghan assumed he tired himself out by crying that much. 

“Please?” As slowly as he could, he was able to push Chan away, holding him up from his armpits instead, Chan’s feet hovered over the water and he shrunk to himself, little legs kicking against the air even though Jeonghan assured him he wouldn’t drop him. “I got you, I got you, I swear.” 

Jeonghan’s tone was laced with his own desperation, he wanted Chan to overcome his fear, he wanted to _help_ , he wanted to reassure him that it’d be okay. 

And he wished Chan would believe him. 

“ _Appa_.” Chan whimpered, his tiny fingers digging into Jeonghan’s forearms as he held on. 

Jeonghan was sure that in all the years since they had adopted Chan, he had never looked more _helpless_. 

He looked like he wanted to say _appa, are you really going to drop me_?

… and Jeonghan couldn’t let that happen. 

Seungcheol and the kids were all holding their breath as they observed and Jeonghan finally sighed, hugging Chan once again. 

The boy let out a breath in relief as soon as he wasn’t suspended in the air anymore, he wrapped arms and legs back on Jeonghan, his face nuzzling Jeonghan’s chest. 

“Baby, what are you afraid of?” Jeonghan asked, for the tenth time today as he comforted the boy, pressing a kiss on Chan’s temple as he bounced him up and down a little. 

Chan breathed shakily and Jeonghan exchanged a concerned look with Seungcheol, he never thought it’d be _this_ hard. 

And now he was having second thoughts about it. 

“I don’t wanna, appa.” 

“I know, I know you don’t want to, but please talk to me, okay? I can’t help you if you won’t tell me what’s bothering you, okay?” He offered softly and Chan only clung tighter, his left hand reaching out to play with the hair on Jeonghan’s nape. 

Memories of Chan as he was a toddler flashed through Jeonghan’s mind because that was exactly what he did whenever he was upset and needed something to play with to calm himself down. 

Then he’d fall asleep on Jeonghan’s arms. 

“Jeonghannie-” Seungcheol started, catching _something_ on his husband’s expression (Jeonghan didn’t know what could that be though, but he figured it could be something akin to heartbreak). 

And Chan’s eyes were watery as he stared at Jeonghan, trembling all over like an abandoned kitten. 

And suddenly Jeonghan just _knew_ what to do. 

“Okay.” Jeonghan took a deep breath, and against all expectations, just pulled him impossibly closer and kissed the top of his head. “We’ll be right back.” 

And just like that, they headed to the changing room. 

If Seungcheol didn’t know Jeonghan better or if he were any other parent, Seungcheol would surely think that he’d be taking him to a private place to scold them or even spank them, who knew. 

Knowing it was Jeonghan though, it just meant that they’d talk privately. 

Whenever they needed to scold or get their children to listen, they’d do it like that. 

There was no need to embarrass them in public and make the situation even worse. 

Silence fell in the room as soon as Jeonghan and Chan left. 

Their time was running out and Seungcheol didn’t need to turn and see their two other children, because he _knew_ they were really worried about Chan. 

So it wasn’t a surprise when he felt a small tap on his forearm, and Seungkwan’s soft voice. 

“Appa, is there anything I can do to help?” 

Seungcheol’s heart warmed at the suggestion and he pulled the boy close, to give him a hug. 

Sometimes he still got shocked at how  _emphatic_ and kind the ten year old was. He was growing up to be just as gentle as Jeonghan was and Seungcheol couldn’t be prouder. 

“It’s okay, baby, Jeonghan-appa will handle it.” Seungcheol assured him, just because he didn’t want Seungkwan to worry too much, he was having fun and he should be. “Thank you though.” 

Wonwoo was standing behind them, eyes fixed on the door of the changing room. 

This was taking a toll on all of them and Seungcheol understood and shared their worry, but… 

“You’ve both been very helpful today, okay?” He praised, smiling at the two. “No matter the outcome, if he ends up swimming today or not… let’s just support him.” 

And he didn’t know if that was the right answer or the appropriate answer or if it worked as an answer _at all_ . But it was _all_ that he had at the moment. 

Seungcheol was worried too, it was always hard to see Chan be this upset over something and it made his heart ache, but Seungkwan and Wonwoo’s chorus of _we will, appa!_ and _don’t worry! he’ll make it!_ certainly made him feel a little better. 

***

“Baby.” 

“No.” 

“Listen to me.”

“No.” 

“Chan.” 

“Appa, _no_.” 

“Chan, listen to me.” Jeonghan repeated, voice firmer, even though his gaze towards the child was soft. 

“No.” 

“Take a big deep breath for me.” 

Chan had his arms crossed against his chest, as he sat on the bench and Jeonghan knelt so he could look at him in the eye. 

He was trying very hard _not_ to cry, and Jeonghan knew that expression very well. He wasn’t fake crying as he sometimes did when he was younger, he was actually upset and distressed. 

“Channie.” 

The boy complied, his intake of breath shaky and wet, but he didn’t shed another tear, instead he just looked down at his joined hands now. 

He looked sheepish. 

“There you go.” He praised, smiling at him. “Now another one.”

Only after Chan looked calmer, Jeonghan decided to speak. 

People tried to get kids to listen whenever they were upset or in the middle of crying, but Jeonghan knew it was best if he waited until the child was calm enough. 

“Okay, did appa make you upset with the swimming thing?” Chan nodded, eyes glued to the floor, Jeonghan gently tilted his chin up and smiled reassuringly at him.

His poor baby was having a hard time and Jeonghan felt both guilty and responsible for it, yet at the same time… he had to make sure that Chan understood him too. 

They had been dwelling about what to do for _months_ now and they couldn’t delay this even more. 

“Baby, eyes on me, okay?” Jeonghan reminded him, and he smiled again once Chan complied. “There you are.” 

Chan gave him a small, shy smile and Jeonghan reached out to gently caress his cheek. 

“Have I ever let you fall before?” 

One deep breath.

Another one. 

And Chan slowly shook his head. 

“Has Seungcheol-appa ever let you fall before?”

Another shake. 

“We’d rather get hurt ourselves than to hurt you, baby.” Jeonghan explained and _oh_ if only Chan knew the things they would be willing to do for him, the things they had _done_ to make sure he was safe and taken care of. How ever could Jeonghan convey that to him? “We love you so _so_ much.” 

“Appa… I don’t wanna…” Chan mumbled weakly, standing up just to lean on Jeonghan’s chest, not being able to be apart from him for too long. 

Which usually happened every time Chan went through something like this. 

He got clingier and even more dependent. 

Jeonghan’s heart ached for him. 

“Shh, it’s okay, Channie.” He assured him, his hands immediately coming to support him, holding his waist. The boy was so exhausted, that his legs were like jelly, and he looked like he was about to stumble and fall. 

“I’m scared.” Chan mumbled, words slurring against his dad’s shoulder. “I don’t want to, I don’t want to, appa, please?” 

“I know you are, baby. But we’re all right here, we won’t let you fall, I promise.” 

“But… but Seungcheol-appa…” 

“Appa will be right there to catch you.” He assured him, pressing kisses all over his face. Chan would have squirmed away saying he was _too old for this now!_ but apparently not today. And Jeonghan was thankful that he was willing to receive the affection. 

Because Jeonghan knew it was hard to raise a child and sometimes he worried about being the dad that _set the rules_ and made the kids _do the things they didn’t want to do_. In the beginning Seungcheol had been too much of a softie to set some boundaries, but with time they had both learned to take that role. 

 _Someone_ had to teach their kids some rules, and even though Jeonghan often took that part, Seungcheol did it too. 

But with Channie in particular… Jeonghan just _knew_ that he could talk him through anything.

Chan was his baby, he’d always be. 

And he could already see that he was calmer, more willing to listen. 

This was his cue. 

“Sometimes, when we grow up… we have to do things we don’t want to do.” He explained, fixing the boy’s fringe from his eyes.

“Like what?” Then _finally_ for the first time today, Chan looked up at Jeonghan, listening attentively. 

Thank _God_. 

“Okay…” Jeonghan smiled at him gently and tapped on his own chin, mimicking as if he were thinking hard about something. “Remember when you were riding your bike? And you fell and cut your leg?” A small nod, Jeonghan continued. “And it hurt, didn’t it? And you didn’t want to go to the hospital at first, but we had to go anyway. Why did we do that?”

Chan chewed on his lower lip, thoughtfully. 

And Jeonghan resisted the urge to coo out loud at how cute he looked. 

“Because… they made it better.” 

“They did.” He confirmed, hoping to ease down the insecurity on Chan’s eyes, it’d convey the point he was trying to make. “Going there was difficult at first, right?”

Chan nodded. 

“This is similar, baby.” Jeonghan explained. “I understand that you’re afraid, and it’s okay to be afraid sometimes, but… sometimes we do things even though we’re afraid, and it doesn’t turn out so bad.” 

“Like Seungcheol-appa.”

Jeonghan frowned a little. 

Wait, _what_?

“Seungcheol-appa said he was afraid of bugs!” Chan explained, words tumbling with one other, which always happened whenever he wanted to convey his point. “But last week there was a spider in hyung’s room and Wonwoo-hyung escaped and Seungkwan-hyung said _I’m not killing that thing!_ And ran away too! And appa was yelling because he was scared, and he was going _noo_ , _Wonwoo will just have to sleep somewhere else!”_

Jeonghan could easily picture that whole scene and Chan was so funny whenever he tried to act it out. 

His family was chaotic. 

“What happened in the end, baby?” Jeonghan asked, genuinely curious about it all, since he had no idea what had happened. 

Must have been one of those days he got home late because of work.  

“Appa took it outside! And he looked very scared when he did it. Appa is so cool.” Chan gushed, and Jeonghan couldn’t help but to smile again. “He’s the bravest,” He added dreamily.

Ah, Seungcheol. 

Jeonghan had this sudden urge to kiss him, square on the mouth. 

If the _most_ scaredy cat person in the household could take a spider out (and yes the house included three children), then Channie could surely try swimming. 

“He is,” Jeonghan agreed, trying to remember the sixteen year old who still slept with the light on, _I just get spooked if i wake up from a nightmare and the lights are off_ , he had said one day. Scaredy cat. (And just the tiniest bit adorable, Jeonghan was endeared). 

Also it was cute to see how Chan looked up to Seungcheol, he was his _hero_ and Jeonghan couldn’t be more delighted. 

“That’s the thing I’m trying to teach you, Channie.” Jeonghan sat back on the bench and pulled the six year old to his lap, keeping eye contact with him all the time. “Sometimes we’re afraid, and… sometimes well, we try to overcome our fears, okay? Because overcoming them means getting new experiences. And… And it’s hard. And it’s scary.” He stopped for a moment, just in case he was talking too much and the information was too much, but no, Chan was still listening attentively. “But believe me when I say that sometimes it’s so worth the risk, baby. And… and we’re right here, we’ll always protect you, Channie. Not just Seungcheol-appa and I, Wonwoo-hyung and Seungkwan-hyung too, okay? Even your Uncles and your cousins. Grandma and grandpa too. All of us.” 

There was silence for a moment, and Jeonghan’s heart squeezed painfully in his chest, what if this hadn’t helped in the end? 

What if Chan did stay afraid his whole adulthood? Not only with swimming, but letting people in, receiving help or- 

“Okay.” 

Jeonghan blinked, dumbfounded. 

“Okay?” 

“Okay, appa.” Chan confirmed, voice a little firmer now. 

His cheeks were still swollen after crying, his face slightly red, but he was smiling and _that_ smile always reminded him of baby Seungcheol, how determined he was, how dumb yet brave and _oh_ , Jeonghan might cry. 

“That’s my boy.” Jeonghan whispered, voice breaking with overwhelming emotion, but Chan missed it. 

It was okay. 

Chan probably wouldn’t understand why Jeonghan was feeling so emotional, but the fact that their kids were getting _so big_ and so quickly. 

It was heartwarming. 

“Let’s go, appa!” 

Chan and Jeonghan were out of the changing room in a second, getting cheers from the rest of the family as soon as they saw them. 

“Hyungs, appa, I’m going to try it!” 

Seungcheol’s eyes met with Jeonghan’s and both of them shared one private smile, and it was enough for Seungcheol to know that things had gone well after all. 

“There we go,” Jeonghan said, placing a kiss on the top of Chan’s head and setting him down. “You ready?” 

The boy’s legs swayed as he was put down (probably after all the time he spent on Jeonghan’s arms today), but Jeonghan held him, holding his hand as the boy neared the edge. 

Seungcheol was right there in a second, not even a meter away from them, but still. 

Just jumping in would do, that was all. 

“Yes.” Chan mumbled, voice tiny but his eyes were as determined as ever. 

“Okay, on the count of three.” 

Seungkwan and Wonwoo were holding their breaths as Chan stood there, ready to jump. 

“One…” 

Jeonghan gently placed a hand on Chan’s shoulder, encouraging him. 

“Two…” 

Seungcheol opened his arms, giving the youngest the most reassuring smile. 

Chan smiled back at him. 

“Three!” 

***

The water barely splashed when Chan jumped into it the pool, Seungcheol’s strong arms already pulling him back into the surface and holding him close to his chest. 

“Channie you did it!” Seungkwan yelled, clapping his hands. 

“Well done, Channie!” Wonwoo added, a proud smile on his face. 

Jeonghan looked like a puppet whose strings had been cut down, because the moment Chan made it into the water, Jeonghan breathed in relief, dropping into the edge of the pool and holding his chin with his hand, observing the youngest with a small tired smile. 

He had done it. 

Finally. 

Jeonghan looked _so_ relieved and Seungcheol felt the same. 

And since Jeonghan had helped in getting Chan _into_ the water, it was now Seungcheol’s turn to see if they could keep him here. 

So he planted a big kiss on the top of the youngest head and rubbed his back up and down. 

“It wasn’t so bad, was it?” He offered gently, trying not to make a huge deal out of it now, just in case Chan felt sheepish about taking so long. 

Chan looked like a contradiction, he was trembling all over, face _still_ red after crying the whole morning, brows furrowed in confusion _yet_ he was smiling, shakily, _fearfully_ teeth and gums showing. 

 _Was it bad or wasn’t it?_ Seungcheol couldn’t tell. 

“It was o-okay.” Chan mumbled, reaching out to tighten his hold around Seungcheol’s neck, and for a moment Seungcheol lost his ability to breathe, but his baby was smiling, so who needed air anyway?

That was the _least_ of his worries right now. 

Chan had _done_ it. 

After years of being absolutely terrified of water, he had managed to do it. 

Seungcheol couldn’t be prouder. 

“Appa, stay,” Chan pleaded, his ankles securing themselves around Seungcheol’s waist, trying not to touch the water, at least not too deeply. 

Seungcheol and Jeonghan shared a meaningful glance ( _try to keep him there a little longer_ ) and Seungcheol nodded in the end, deciding to just hold the boy to his chest as he hummed. 

Chan looked scared, _yes_ , but he wasn’t crying, he just looked… unsure. 

And that was the best they could aim for at the moment. 

“I’m not going anywhere.” Seungcheol assured him, as he calmly walked around, letting Chan get accustomed to the feeling of water all around him. 

Wonwoo and Seungkwan had started playing once again, trying to race from one side of the pool to the other, and Seungcheol was glad, because Chan kept stealing glances their way, and Seungcheol just hoped that later on, Chan would want to join his brothers. 

“It’s weird.” Chan commented after a few minutes. 

“Is it?” 

“Swimming is weird, appa.” Surely he didn’t mean _swimming_ as the action, since he was just being carried around the pool, but Seungcheol still listened to him. 

He wanted Chan to feel safe and to solve all doubts he might have about this. 

“You like it?” 

Chan’s expression went blank and for a moment Seungcheol worried again, what if he had to do it anyways? 

Swimming club in school would start soon and what if Chan didn’t like it? 

Would he get used to it if they brought him here every once in a while?

Chan’d have to do things he didn’t want to do eventually… and yeah, maybe he was the most spoiled of all of their three children, but that might just be because he was the youngest and he was once the most fragile one…

What was the limit from shielding him from the world? 

“I’m not sure.” Chan said in the end and Seungcheol almost sighed in relief. Okay, not being sure was definitely better than _no_. 

“Okay, you don’t have to know right away.” Seungcheol assured him, still keeping his up and down motion on Chan’s back. “You did good.” 

It always managed to calm him down.  

This had been more exhausting than he initially thought it’d be, but Jeonghan had taken most of it, and Seungcheol was a little sad that he hadn’t managed to help more. 

But at least he kept stealing glances to his husband. 

He was wearing both a swim shirt and shorts, but he had put on one of Seungcheol’s hoodies since he had gotten cold a while ago. 

He looked _so_ cute, Seungcheol wanted to go over him and just kiss him until he got breathless. 

“Wanna try and go towards Wonwoo-hyung and Seungkwan-hyung?” He offered, when he noticed that finally Chan was loosening up the grip he had on him, and he looked eager to explore a little more, his hand splashing water gently. 

“Okay.” 

The next 40 minutes went by quickly, Chan was even confident enough to be carried around by Wonwoo and he even asked Seungkwan to hold his hands as he submerged his head underwater (just once!). 

In the meantime Jeonghan was _finally_ able to take a little break, and he stayed by the edge of the pool, feet hovering over the water. 

He had lost all motivation to join the kids today, but next week he’d totally do it. 

(Besides, not everyday he could look at Seungcheol in only swimming shorts, just wandering around, looking handsome). 

Such a nice sight. 

And observing his family had its advantages too.

He was just hooked on the way Wonwoo looked so attentive, calmly walking around the pool, comforting Chan whenever he’d start to get scared again. 

And how Seungkwan was just right by their side too, trying to distract Chan every time his eyes started to get watery because it all got too overwhelming. 

And lastly his baby, he was trying _so_ hard. 

Jeonghan couldn’t be prouder. 

As he looked at the three children, he just couldn’t help but think- 

“We did that.” 

Jeonghan jumped a little on the spot, startled because he was _so_ immersed in watching the kids that he had lost sight of his husband. 

Seungcheol was smiling warmly at him, and he sat down next to him, reaching out to hold his hand. His skin was damp and slightly cold, but Jeonghan didn’t mind, just squeezing back and smiling too.

 _We did that_.

So he wasn’t the only one who had been observing, huh? 

“Well…” Jeonghan started, leaning on Seungcheol’s shoulder and watching the kids laugh and splash water at each other. They were _so_ cute. “We did _some_ of that. We got lucky with such wonderful kids.” 

He felt another light squeeze on his hand, and then, when he had just closed his eyes, a kiss on the top of his hair. 

 _Years_ had passed since he married this man, but his cheeks still warmed up with the gentle displays of affection that Seungcheol was always so willing to give to him. 

“I think I got lucky with such a wonderful husband.” 

Jeonghan would be lying if he said his heart didn’t skip a beat at that, but he at least had to pretend not to be so affected. 

“Shut up, you’re so cheesy.”

“But you love me.” 

Jeonghan recalled Seungcheol’s expression as Chan was about to jump into the water, how reassuring he looked, how trustworthy, the picture of _reliability_ , of home. 

“I do.” Jeonghan said, smiling as he brought Seungcheol’s hand to his mouth, to press a gentle kiss against his knuckles. 

(He only loved him until then though, because not a minute later, the kids had appeared behind them and all _four_ of them [traitors] had thrown him into the pool.

Fully clothed and everything). 

***

“Oh my God, what have you done to him?” 

Jeonghan tried not to roll his eyes at Soonyoung’s dramatic and incriminating tone. 

Since they had to go back to work _and_ take the older kids back to school, they had asked Soonyoung and Jihoon to take the youngest to their company for the rest of the day. 

Swimming-pool-day was officially over for the Yoon family. 

(And it had been _so_ long). 

“What’s gotten you so sulky, hm? Wanna tell Uncle Soonie about it?” Soonyoung asked, extending his arms towards Chan and positively beaming when the child easily complied, climbing on his lap for a cuddle. 

“ _Uncle_ ,” He whined, mumbling how he _was swimming_ and _we left too early._  

The boy looked the picture of both exhaustion and grumpiness, and he quickly wrapped arms and legs around Soonyoung, hiding in the crook of his shoulder. 

Wonwoo and Seungkwan had already said their hellos and they were putting their bags in the trunk of the car, just as Seungcheol and Jeonghan said goodbye to Chan. 

“So, how did the lesson go?” Jihoon asked from the driver’s seat. 

Seungcheol only gave a long suffering sigh, so Jeonghan elbowed him playfully, _please don’t be so dramatic_. 

“Channie, want to tell uncle Jihoon how the lesson went?” He asked instead, but the child only lifted his head from Soonyoung’s shoulder to look at them seriously and then shake his head. 

Jeonghan only shrugged, in any other occasion he’d have corrected the attitude, but it had been _such_ a long day. 

And the boy was usually a sweetheart, and very polite, so they could let this one slide. 

“It’s been a long day for him.” Jeonghan said, knowing that Chan was cranky because after _refusing_ to get into the water, then getting in with some struggle, now he hadn’t wanted to _leave_ the pool.

(Because he was having _so much_ fun). 

Of course this would happen. 

Same thing had happened with the _damn_ (sorry, Wonwoo) cat. 

Chan was absolutely afraid of them and he hid every time a cat dared to look in his direction, but now he was the cat’s favorite person! 

Ah… parenting was exhausting. 

But well… all in all, Jeonghan was thankful that things had gone this way and Chan decided he _liked_ swimming after all, because it was a useful skill and it wouldn’t interfere whenever he wanted to have fun with his siblings and friends. 

“Uncle, why can’t we stay in the pool?” Chan whined, fidgeting with Soonyoung’s shirt. “I wanna stay.”

Before Soonyoung could easily fall into the kid’s whims (because it was _that_ easy to bribe him, especially if Chan was involved), Seungcheol intervened. 

“Baby, your uncles have to go back to work now, okay? We’ll come back to the pool in two weeks.”

Jeonghan hummed his agreement. 

“Besides your hyungs need to go back to school, and appa and I will come back to work for the day.” Jeonghan added, taking advantage of how distracted Chan was, to gently pick him up and sit him on the back, buckling him up and then kissing the top of his head. 

Back when he was younger, Soonyoung and Jihoon carried him in their arms in the backseat, but they knew they couldn’t possibly do it now. 

(And they shouldn’t have allowed that back then either, but it was only for short drives). 

“But appa, there’s so much time left until two weeks from now.” Chan sighed dramatically and now Seungcheol reached out to place a kiss on the top of his head. 

They had to leave _now_ otherwise the kids wouldn’t make it back to school in time. 

And Jeonghan seemed to realize the same thing, because he leaned in and fixed Chan’s hair lovingly. 

“They’ll pass soon, baby.” Jeonghan assured him. “Have a great time with Uncle Soonie and Uncle Jihoonie, be a good boy, okay?” 

“Okay, appa.” Chan said, through gritted teeth, as he crossed his arms against his chest. 

(Just to show how much he _disagreed_ on this swimming schedule). 

Silence followed once Jihoon and Soonyoung stayed with his nephew all by themselves. 

In a matter of minutes, Jihoon turned on the music, since that always helped Chan cheer up, and Soonyoung turned from his seat to hold Chan’s hand and give him a light squeeze, smiling at him. 

"So… Channie, did you learn how to swim?” Jihoon asked, breaking the silence and Chan immediately gave him one confident nod. “Was it hard?" 

Chan hummed in thought, remembering the whole morning.

"Not at all, Uncle." He said, giving him a big toothy smile. 

***

“Alright! It’s _take your nephew to work_ day!” Soonyoung clapped his hands. “Are you excited, Channie?”

“Uncle,” Chan pouted, crossing his arms against his chest. Two whole hours had passed since they picked Chan up at the pool (they had gotten lunch, even ice cream as dessert too [shhh, Jeonghan was not supposed to know about that] and they had come back to the company building), and Chan was still as sulky as he had been when they forcefully pulled him out of the water. “I really really _really_ wanted to stay in the pool with Seungcheol-appa and Jeonghan-appa and Wonwoo-hyung and Seungkwan-hyung.” 

Soonyoung’s smile faded a little. 

This wasn’t the way their day was supposed to go. 

They were supposed to have fun! 

Considering their hectic schedule Soonyoung and Jihoon barely saw Channie anymore, and only managed to see Seokmin when he was back from school. 

Soonyoung had missed his nephew and he was looking forward to having some time with him. 

“Ah, sweetheart.” Soonyoung cooed, ruffling the boy’s slightly damp hair. “Sorry, but your appas need to go back to work and your hyungs back to school, but it’s okay because we’ll have fun!” 

Chan looked unconvinced, his mouth forming a big pout. 

Soonyoung kind of wanted to squish his cheeks, but that’d probably make him even madder. 

“I wanna go home.” Chan said with a whine, and it was the first time in _years_ since his nephew said something like that, he was usually so happy to spend time with his (favorite) uncle. 

It totally did _not_ break Soonyoung’s heart into a million tiny little pieces. 

Ah, was this what they meant when they said the kids entered adolescence and they cared about no one? 

(It was _not_ , Chan was only six). 

So he rushed to make it better. 

“Oh, Channie, come on.” He knelt down to be at his height and caressed his cheek, smiling when Chan gave up on his serious stance and gave him a small grin in return. “There you are, look, I promise we’ll have fun.” 

“But Uncle-” 

“Okay, _okay_ , I’ve got an idea!” He said quickly, before Chan could make a protest. “How about we…” He looked around, practice room, music, back up dancers. “Let’s dance!” 

Chan wasn’t able to hide how his eyes lit up with the idea, but his smile faded a little just a second after. 

“But appa says not to make exercise after just eating lunch.” Chan added a little sadly. 

“That’s just something adults say, Channie, it doesn’t mean anything!” Soonyoung assured him, heading to the back of the room to turn on the music.

One of Chan’s favorite songs. 

He didn’t want Chan to get even sadder than he already was, and Jeonghan didn’t have to know they had danced just like fifteen minutes after eating food. 

It could be their secret. 

The only thing he knew for sure, is that he didn’t want to see that sullen expression on the boy’s face and he’d do _anything_ to make it all better. 

“You sure, Uncle?” Chan asked, although his feet were already leading him to the center of the practice room, where Soonyoung was starting to warm up.

“Yeah!” Soonyoung said, shouting over the loud music as Chan finally complied, standing next to him to start dancing on the song.

This was exactly what Soonyoung was thinking about when he knew that he’d be spending a whole afternoon with Chan.

One of his favorite nephews, the little dancer, a  _ star _ , just like him.

“Nothing bad will happen!” Soonyoung said, effectively erasing the last ounce of doubt on Chan’s eyes. “Trust your Uncle Soonyoung on this!” 

***

“You did _what_ again?” 

“Made him dance… and he,” Soonyoung looked down, furiously wiping the floor before any of the managers came inside and would tell the VP what he had done to their _new_ practice room.

“Soonyoung.” Jihoon warned, hands on his hips.

He had just arrived, he had been working on a new song with one of Zodiac’s main vocals, when Soonyoung had called him and told him to _come quickly please_. 

Chan was nowhere to be seen and Jihoon _tried_ not to worry, but this was too infuriating to let it pass. 

“...He threw up.” Soonyoung mumbled, words barely making it out of his mouth. 

Jihoon waited. 

Just in case he hadn’t heard correctly and Soonyoung would rectify his words. 

(But that didn’t happen). 

“You made him throw up,” Jihoon repeated and Soonyoung winced, trying not to puke with the smell of vomit.

He didn’t deal well with this stuff. 

Mingyu? Sure! Hao? if he had to, he’d do it! Jeonghan? A little squeamish at first, but he’d surely do it. 

Soonyoung?

… 

Not really. 

Jihoon let out a long sigh and looked around the room once again, Chan was still nowhere to be seen. 

“Where is he?” 

“Eunae-noona offered to take him to the bathroom so he’d change his shirt.” Soonyoung explained as he finally finished up cleaning the floor. 

No managers had seen him, ha! 

He carried all the dirty wipes back to a trash can and he _finally_ was able to wash his hands. 

(They still smelled like vomit though). 

“I’m going to look for him,” Jihoon started, just when he felt some commotion at the door and turned to see all of Zodiac girls, plus Eunae (choreographer, just like Soonyoung was), and Chan, holding onto the latter’s hand. 

He had been crying, that much was obvious. 

He always cried whenever he puked, and Soonyoung couldn’t judge him that much for it, because he also hated it when he was a child. 

Well… as an adult too, to be honest. 

Chan ignored the two of them, of course, why would he even look at them when his _favorite group of all time_ was just right there! 

All the girls seemed to be gushing around him, telling him how cute he was and cooing at him so he wouldn’t cry. 

Chan couldn’t be happier now. 

As Jihoon observed the situation, he couldn’t say he wasn’t surprised. 

Chan was surrounded by people who enjoyed being the center of attention and Chan wasn’t the exception. 

“The girls came because they heard him crying.” Eunae explained, appearing at their side and smiling at Chan. “And he immediately stopped when he saw them, because he said he wanted to look cool.” 

That totally sounded like something Chan would do, so Soonyoung snickered, just imagining the whole situation. 

At his side though, Jihoon wasn’t as cheerful. 

“Soonyoung,” Jihoon started patiently, arms crossed against his chest. (Just as Chan had looked when Jeonghan and Seungcheol told him he wasn’t allowed to stay in the pool anymore). “Why on earth would you-” 

“You told me to cheer him up!” 

“I told you to cheer him up, not giving him a dance lesson after he’d _just_ finished lunch.” 

“But dancing makes him happy!” 

Well, Jihoon couldn’t argue with _that_. 

But still! 

“You know what _doesn’t_ make a child happy though? Yes, _exactly_ , throwing up!” 

“It’s not like I _knew_ it’d happen, okay?!” 

“Then why do these things only happen to you?” Jihoon asked, only a little exasperated, because he was genuinely curious. 

The most trouble Mingyu had ever gotten into was when he was babysitting Seungkwan and he forgot about his school project, but he improvised and managed to do it anyways and Seungkwan got the best mark anyway! 

That was it. 

 _Soonyoung_ , on the other hand, had managed to forget the kids at home, that one time he gave peanuts to Wonwoo when he was allergic, that time that Junhui fell from the tree he was climbing because he said they were making a _competition_ , _oh_ and that time Seungkwan had burned with the- 

“They don’t only happen to me!” Soonyoung bit back, lips forming a pout. “And it wasn’t _that_ bad. Look at him, he looks okay!” 

Jihoon took a moment and _looked_. 

Chan in fact looked okay. 

Yeah, face red and all, he probably reeked of vomit anyways, but he wasn’t trembling anymore and he wasn’t mad or sulky. 

He looked _fine_. 

Happy even, just because he had a chance to meet his idols, Jihoon guessed. 

“Amazing,” Jihoon said a disbelieving smile and a sigh. “You know what… I’ll just never understand why he looks _that_ happy even though you made him throw up now.” 

“You make it sound like I make him have accidents all the time.” Soonyoung whined. “Name three times when something similar to this has happened and then-” 

“That time Jeonghan handed him over to you for the first time and you dropped him, or that time you babysat and he fell down the stairs and lost a tooth, that time you were throwing him into the air and his head hit the ceiling or that time you went with him to the zoo and an alpaca-” 

“Okay!” Soonyoung interrupted, placing his hand over Jihoon’s mouth. 

He didn’t remember _all_ of those incidents if he were being honest with himself, but that didn’t mean anything! 

Or did it? 

Was he such a terrible caretaker to the kids? 

Soonyoung’s smile faded instead, and he looked down at his hands. 

It wasn’t that he didn’t mean well. He wanted the boys to have fun when they were with him, but sometimes things got out of control and… well, things like this happened. 

“You made your point. I _suck_.” Soonyoung whispered, his expression was a calm one, but his tone betrayed him, he was actually hurt. 

What was he supposed to do?

He couldn’t be a parent like Jeonghan, strict and loving at the same time, or Seungcheol, kind of cute and firm whenever he had to make sure the kids studied or went to bed. 

He could _try_ , but he wasn’t like them. 

“That’s…” Jihoon took a deep breath. “Not what I meant.” 

“Yeah?” Soonyoung asked, dwelling on his own thoughts now, too busy to focus on Jihoon’s soft expression. “What do you mean?” He asked quietly, eyes fixed on the floor. 

“This is what I mean.” Jihoon gently guided Soonyoung’s chin so he’d look back on the only couch on the practice room, where Chan was surrounded by Zodiac girls, as he was wearing one of Soonyoung’s t-shirts (Zodiac Crew ♡) and it looked huge on him, reaching his knees. 

He looked _adorable_. 

As Soonyoung focused though, he was able to make up Chan’s words. 

 _Uncle Soonyoung made Highlight’s choreography._ Chan said seriously, and the girls were kindly paying attention (as if they didn’t know). _He won an award for it! He’s the best dancer in the whole world!_

Soonyoung’s heart skipped a beat. 

“He loves you.” Jihoon said softly, with that _tone,_  the one he used with only Seok and him. “Despite all of that.” 

Chan kept talking but words didn’t register anymore, Soonyoung was too moved by the fact that even though this had just happened, Chan _wasn’t_ mad, he was happy, he’d still praise him.

He still admired him. 

“So he’s either a masochist, or-” Jihoon started, because he loved breaking the moments. 

“Oh my God, he loves _me_.” 

And the realization hit Soonyoung _hard_. 

Not even an hour had passed since Chan had said _uncle i wanna go home_ and now he was happy and Soonyoung had made that! 

He made him stop being grumpy and sad. 

He made it all _better_. 

That was _exactly_ what Jeonghan and Seungcheol did all the time and now _Soonyoung_ had done it! 

Kudos to him. 

“Of course, he does. You idiot.” Jihoon said, his tone soft despite his harsh words. “You’re his favorite uncle. Like ever. Don’t tell me you didn’t know that.”  

"Jihoonie… are you finally admitting that I-" 

Oh, this was _such_ a nice day. 

Sure, things had looked a little bad in the beginning, but not now! 

Today was an excellent day.

“I am.” Jihoon nodded at him, reaching out to ruffle his hair playfully. It was only a moment, since they usually didn’t indulge in PDA whenever they were at work. “Now _please_ ,” He winced. 

(And for some reason, Soonyoung did too, knowing what was coming). 

“Go wash yourself up, you reek of vomit.” 

Ah, his husband. 

 _Always_ breaking the moments! 

...

Such a romantic! 

***

"Why doesn't it feel the same with Seok?" 

“Mm?” 

Two hours had passed since the vomit incident number 2 (Soonyoung had wanted to call this vomit incident number 1, but he remembered he once was giving Wonwoo a piggyback ride and he ran too fast and well… similar outcome). 

Soonyoung was observing the girls practicing with Eunae now, and he was on the couch, holding Chan as he dozed on his chest. 

Jihoon was right there next to him, observing the dance practice with sharp eyes as well. 

“What do you mean why doesn’t it feel the same with Seok?” Jihoon asked, showing that even though his eyes were glued to the practice, he was still listening to Soonyoung. 

“Well… this feeling that… if I do something bad, if I fuck up, he’ll be scarred for life.” Soonyoung explained. “Every time I’m with Channie, or you know like Seungkwan, when he was very tiny, I get this overwhelming feeling to… like not make a mistake?” 

Jihoon was tempted to joke about the mistake Soonyoung had _just_ made, but he felt his joke would be misplaced. 

Soonyoung was being serious after all. 

“Well… Seok’s a whole person.” Jihoon commented, trying to make sense of it too. 

It was something he had talked about with Seungcheol once, but he wasn’t exactly able to finish that conversation. 

He kept wondering from time to time, but he still didn’t have an answer. 

“Unlike this one, he’s just… you know, scattered body parts.” Soonyoung pointed loosely at Chan, with a deadpan expression. 

 _Ugh_ , Jihoon hated him a little sometimes. 

“Shut _up_ , you know what I mean.” 

But instead of Soonyoung replying to his banter with _another_ more elaborate banter, he just fell silent. 

And suddenly everything Jihoon could hear were the trainees talking to each other, the faint music coming from the speaker.

And Chan’s heavy breathing. 

Soonyoung’s _expression_ though… 

He looked like he had fallen in one of _those_ pensive moods and that was not good. 

He looked unsure of himself and that was the worst look he could ever have, if you asked Jihoon. 

Insecurity and self doubt didn’t go well with Soonyoung’s personality. And Jihoon couldn’t allow this. 

“What do you mean then?” Soonyoung asked quietly, patting the space next to him. 

They were already close, but apparently Soonyoung wanted him to be even _closer_.  

Jihoon looked around first. 

Zodiac’s kids were scattered around, drinking some water before they had to start practicing again and there were some members of the staff just lazing around, making sure to play the right part of the song they were practicing. 

The thing was… 

Few people knew they were together in the company and Jihoon and Soonyoung weren’t especially vocal about it. Just producer and choreographer, same company, _close_ friends. 

Still, Jihoon didn’t have too much time to dwell on it, just deciding to indulge his husband and sit, eyes fixed on Soonyoung’s gloomy expression. 

“That… you know, we should probably have this conversation at home and not here, but… what I mean is, Seokmin is all grown up. Not like Seungkwannie when he just arrived, huh? Remember those times?” Jihoon commented, noticing just now how _soft_ Chan looked, his cheek pressed against Soonyoung’s shoulder, his arms wrapped tight around his neck.

Chan felt the safest whenever he was around his family, but Jihoon was sure that Soonyoung was the next person on the list. 

He looked like he belonged there. 

“Yeah. Seungcheol-hyung looked like he didn’t sleep for more than two hours every night for like six months and I had never seen Jeonghan cry that much.” Soonyoung said with a sigh. Remembering those times was… kind of bittersweet now. Things had gone well after all, but so _much_ had happened, and Soonyoung bet the kids never noticed how much more they went through. Raising kids was _hard_ and you only realized that as you did it. “We… didn’t go through that with Seok, did we?” 

“When Junnie arrived too. He was… he barely talked, remember? I don’t think I heard his voice until Wonwoo started to pull him out of his shell.” Jihoon added, hyper aware of how close Soonyoung was now, how this conversation wasn’t supposed to happen in a place like this, but he couldn’t bring himself to stop, because he had been wondering this ever since they adopted Seokmin, eight months ago. 

The questions and thoughts had been dancing on his mind for what seemed like _ages_ , but only Soonyoung managed to give him this sense of clarity. 

This ability to transform his feelings into proper words. 

When Soonyoung went quiet though, Jihoon was finally able to pick up what was really going on on his husband’s mind. 

“So… I don’t know. You think we have it easy with Seok?” Jihoon ventured. 

And by the way Soonyoung’s expression shifted, he had hit bingo. 

Soonyoung looked troubled and… what for? 

For having it _too_ easy? 

Did he feel like he was being unfair with Jeonghan and Seungcheol, or with Mingyu and Minghao? 

Soonyoung was always too kind for his own good and Jihoon really wanted to reach out, place a warm hand on the back of his neck, a kiss on his cheek. 

But they were _still_ here, so he couldn’t. 

“Maybe… maybe we have it easy, maybe it looks easy, but it’s not? And I keep thinking this will come back to bite us in the ass.” 

“Language.” Jihoon chastised and he immediately checked (just in case), but Chan was still fast asleep. 

Thank God. 

He didn’t want to have to deal with Jeonghan telling them _why did Channie say_ fuck _after you just babysat him?_

An angry Jeonghan wasn’t a pleasant Jeonghan. 

“We gotta work on that.” Soonyoung said with a dramatic sigh, and Jihoon smiled, used to his husband’s antics on this. 

“We’re parents now.” He said, without missing a beat. “Respectable members of society.” 

They both laughed, because they still thought it was funny that _they_ ended up with a child, but even though Jihoon kept on laughing, enjoying the absurdity of the moment, Soonyoung’s laughter died down, and instead he just… _stared_ at Jihoon. 

He had always loved the way his eyes crinkled as he smiled, and how Soonyoung was one of the few people that could make him laugh like _this_ , ever since they met in school, and after all these years. 

Woah. 

He had really married Jihoon, hadn’t he?

And not only that. 

_We’re parents now._

Soonyoung smiled softly at the reminder, and for a moment Jihoon was _right there_ within reach, and Soonyoung really wanted to kiss him. 

 _Fuck_ all the people that didn’t know they were together. 

There were moments in a person’s life where you just had to _kiss_ your significant other, you just had to, no ulterior motives, just the sheer- 

“Uncle,” Chan’s groggy voice interrupted his thoughts and the boy slowly pulled at his shirt as he woke up, blinking up sleepily at him. 

The boy slowly took notice of his surroundings and he tugged on Soonyoung’s shirt more forcefully this time. 

“Uncle, what time is it? You said you had to pick Seokmin-hyung at five, it’s so late already!” He claimed, cuddling on Soonyong’s neck even though his urgent words were telling him to get up.  

Jihoon‘s hand reached out to smooth Chan’s hair and Soonyoung was hit by the urge to kiss him _all over_ again. 

Why did Jihoon have to look so _soft_ as he did that? 

Damn. 

He’d just have to wait until they were at home, wouldn’t he?

So unfair. 

“Channie, you’re so responsible.” Soonyoung gushed, squishing Chan’s cheeks until the boy squirmed. 

“Uncle, _no_ , I’m big!” 

“Ah, but you’re still Uncle Soonie’s baby, aren’t you?” 

“ _Uncle_.” 

“Oh.” Jihoon said, voice carrying an edge of worry. 

“What?”

“Chan _is_ right. It’s four and a half. We’re running late.” Jihoon commented and Soonyoung was up in a second. 

Ah, _yes_ , they were parents now! 

“ _Shit_ -oh, wait, Channie, don’t repeat that.” Soonyoung said quickly, grabbing Chan’s belongings, along with his own jacket and bag. “Say bye-bye to everyone Channie! We need to leave fast!” 

Jihoon was following close behind, smiling fondly at Soonyoung’s panicked expression. 

They wouldn’t be parents of the year, but… they were definitely trying! 

And that counted for something, right?

***

Soonyoung hit the brakes on the school’s parking lot at five pm _sharp_. 

(He might have sped a little more than he ought to, but well… the important thing was that they were all safe and on time!). 

 _Yes_ , maybe they deserved some credit after all! 

This day had been a weird one, but as he looked at the backseat through the rear mirror, he couldn’t help but to smile at the sight. 

Jihoon was awkwardly holding a napping Chan to his chest, and his nephew was still wearing his Zodiac t-shirt, looking even tinier than he was.

It was the _cutest_. 

They were lucky that Chan was small for a six year old, otherwise they wouldn’t be able to carry him around this easily, especially with Jihoon’s height. 

Not like Soonyoung would _ever_ say something like that out loud though, since Jihoon was very sensitive about that particular subject. 

“Okay, so you can wait in the car, and I’ll be right back.” Soonyoung said, unbuckling his seat belt and picking up his phone, just in case he’d miss Seokmin between _all_ the kids that left school at the same time and he’d need to call. 

Just as he opened the door to leave though, Jihoon’s voice interrupted him. 

“ _Wait_ , Soonyoung.” He said, words urgent and Soonyoung immediately froze, turning to sit back down and look at his husband. 

Jihoon _never_ sounded like that, he looked so… flustered. 

It wasn’t like him at all. 

“What is it, Jihoonie?” 

“We didn’t finish talking, but…” Jihoon started, trying to come up with words that would convey what he meant. He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about their conversation in the practice room, and it felt wrong just to… leave the subject like that. “We might have it easy… or maybe any day from now will get difficult, but… The thing is… let’s just treasure this as it is. Easy or not. He loves us, doesn’t he? And we love him.” 

Oh… 

 _Oh._  

Soonyoung was in deep. 

This was so unexpected, yet it sounded like something Jihoon would say, only to him. 

He was stunned, overwhelmed, _speechless_.

Once again Jihoon had talked him to silence. 

Just like that. 

“And I love you.” Jihoon added, a light pink dusting his cheeks. Soonyoung’s heart picked up speed, _oh_ , he was in _so_ deep. 

His highschool sweetheart, his best friend, his husband, the father of his child. 

He loved him _so_ much. 

Words failed to describe. 

“Jihoonie,” Soonyoung started, his voice trembling with emotion as he did so. 

“It’s _that_ easy sometimes.” Jihoon added, and he wasn’t looking at him anymore, instead his eyes were fixed on _something_ behind him. 

Soonyoung slowly turned, catching Seokmin rushing to their car with a huge smile on his face. 

Ah.

This was his life now.

Nephew napping on his car after throwing up, husband being cheesy from time to time, son running towards him in excitement. 

He didn’t know what he did to deserve this, but he was thankful. 

The ring hanging from his chest burned in a good way, and Soonyoung appreciated the reminder. 

This felt so good, _great_ even. 

 _Yes_ , he’d never be the best dad, or the best uncle, but it was okay. 

He was happy and the people he loved were too. 

What else could he ever need? 


	8. Yoon family/Costumes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Halloween preparations get an emotional twist in the Yoon’s household.

 Ah, Halloween. 

Or better known as _one of the things Jeonghan and Seungcheol never celebrated, but now did! Thanks to the children!_

Well, Wonwoo in particular had never felt too interested in dressing up and he didn’t like candies that much, so they’d rather watch a movie together and call it a day. But when Seungkwan arrived, then Junhui and Chan did, and now Seokmin… they had _five_ children among the three couples, so they figured it was enough for a Halloween party of some sorts. 

Besides their children had friends in common too, so all in all it’d be crowded enough to call it a Halloween _party_ , but not enough so it’d get out of hand. 

All the children had been excited during Halloween preparations, if you asked Seungcheol. 

Some of them had enjoyed buying candies (Junhui and Wonwoo… and Soonyoung) and other decorations, and _costume picking_ had been by far the most fun they’d ever had, according to all of them. 

Seungcheol made sure to fix his shirt one last time. 

He had gone for a regular, vampire costume, one, because it was the easiest. Two, because their youngest _still_ liked to be carried around _everywhere_ and Seungcheol couldn’t possibly pick anything with props that would hinder movement. 

(And three, Jeonghan had said he’d look hot with smokey eyeshadow and plush red lips… and how could Seungcheol ever say no to him?)

Their house was _silent_ , which was unusual and immediately worried Seungcheol. 

Wonwoo must have just gotten out of the shower, and Seungkwan was receiving help from Jeonghan with his costume and Chan was getting ready all by himself, because he was _big enough to do so now!_  

But still. 

Minghao had said the party would begin at _five_ and it was already past four. 

They needed to leave _fast_. 

He gave himself one more look in the mirror before heading up to check on the kids. 

Seungcheol thought he was too old to dress up as anything for Halloween, but… well, he’d do anything for their kids. 

(And maybe to see Jeonghan wearing his male version of Harley Quinn costume). 

...

Yup, all for the kids. 

***

“Why aren’t you dressing up?” Seungcheol asked, as he leaned against the door of his son’s bedroom. 

Of all their children he didn’t expect _Wonwoo_ to be the one late. 

Sure, the eldest had a hard time waking up early for school sometimes, but he was very responsible about being on time, Seungcheol thought it had to do with his _responsible_ hyung image he tried to keep at all times. 

Wonwoo jumped a little in reaction, almost dropping his phone. 

He was sitting on his bed, costume nowhere to be seen and eyes fixed on the floor. 

His hair was damp so he had taken that shower, but… why wasn’t he wearing the costume? 

And… he looked nervous? Somehow. 

That was a _first_. 

Seungcheol wasn’t used to seeing him like that at all. 

Although Wonwoo was only fourteen, he still remained one of the calmest, most collected people Seungcheol had ever met. 

“Is there something wrong?” Seungcheol pressed a little more, when Wonwoo didn’t reply to his question. Wonwoo only shook his head, refusing to look up. “We’re going to be late for the party, baby.” He added, his tone going softer when his son remained fixed on his spot. 

Okay.

That was worrying. 

“Don’t really know if I wanna go.” Wonwoo whispered. 

Seungcheol didn’t miss the worried tone. 

He took a deep breath, waiting for a few seconds (eight, to be exact), and when nothing happened, he decided to sit next to his son, patting his thigh gently as he did so. 

Seungcheol knew that Wonwoo actually _wanted_ to go. He had picked a costume and decided he’d dress up (for the _first_ time ever, since he hated costumes as a kid). 

So why now, only missing like one hour to the party, did he change his mind? 

“What’s on your mind, bud?” Seungcheol asked, when it was clear that Wonwoo wouldn’t start on his own. 

His son was wearing only jeans and a white t-shirt, and his golden specs, as he always did, but it suddenly dawned on Seungcheol how _big_ he was. How sharp the cut of his cheekbones had gotten, and how he had missed all the baby fat on his cheeks, losing all his childlike features. 

To think that Wonwoo had spent seven years of his life with them. 

It was… _woah_. 

Just unbelievable sometimes. 

“Am I handsome?”

Seungcheol blinked away his confusion. Had he heard that correctly? 

He was _just_ thinking about that and now… 

 _Now_ Wonwoo was right there, looking so tiny and insecure all of a sudden and it threw Seungcheol off. 

“You’re the most handsome.” Seungcheol replied right away, almost like a reflex. And he wasn’t lying, he really thought so, he always said it to their kids. But Wonwoo didn’t look convinced at all, instead just rolling his eyes with a little scoff, as if to say _yeah, appa, right._

“There’s going to be like… a costume contest and I feel like…” Wonwoo trailed off for a moment, fidgeting with his phone in his hands. “That I’ll look kind of ridiculous. I don’t know.” 

His tone had gone so soft that Seungcheol almost missed it, but he was glad he hadn’t because he doubted Wonwoo would be repeating that. 

Seungcheol hadn’t thought about it, but now it suddenly made a little sense. Maybe Wonwoo had never wanted to dress up before, or perform, because he hated the idea of making a fool out of himself. 

Afraid to look a little _silly_. 

Wonwoo had always been far too mature, even as a child. And sometimes it broke Seungcheol’s heart to see him too immersed in the _hyung_ role or the perfect student role or even being the most responsible of all the five kids. 

Of course he worried. 

He had missed a big part of his childhood to a lot of adults concerns, so Seungcheol would make sure he’d get to enjoy things like these now. 

But _how_ to convey that to him? He didn’t want to push, since he knew it was hard for Wonwoo to say these things in the first place. 

“Wonwoo…” He started. “I understand that this is something that you usually don’t do, but I promise it’s going to be fun. Junnie is going to be there and everyone will be wearing a costume, and I’m not just saying this because I’m your dad, but you’re really _so_ handsome.” 

“ _Appa_ , come on-” 

“No, wait, hear me out.” Seungcheol begged, before Wonwoo could start to contradict him. It was getting harder to outsmart him these days, but Seungcheol wouldn’t give up on this. “Look, baby. I know that you’re afraid.” 

Wonwoo’s cheeks went a little pink, but when Seungcheol reached out to hold his hand and squeeze it, he gently squeezed back too. 

“And sometimes it’s scary to show a vulnerable side to other people.” He could see Wonwoo thinking it through already, chewing on his lip. “But you deserve to have fun with your friends, okay? And if you don’t wanna go with a costume it’s okay, you can go as yourself, but _please_ consider going. Don’t want you to stay here and then regret later.” 

Silence fell between them for a few minutes. 

Seungcheol was anxious, worried he might have worsened the situation. When Wonwoo was younger, he always came to Jeonghan for advice, _always_ , he went to Seungcheol when he wanted to play or to talk about whatever, that was their dynamic back then. 

But now that Wonwoo had gotten older… he had suddenly changed his mind and he came to _Seungcheol_ for advice instead. 

And of course, Seungcheol always felt unprepared. 

Wonwoo slowly got up from the bed, the action interrupting Seungcheol’s thoughts, and he headed to the dresser where his Phantom of the Opera costume was. 

Seungcheol’s heart was beating fast in his chest, this was _so_ nerve-wracking, had he managed to convince him? He hoped that he had. But if he hadn’t, what would he do? 

He’d have to stay with Wonwoo and explain to the rest of the family he wouldn’t be going and- 

“Can you…” Wonwoo started tentatively, holding the costume up with a small smile. “Help me with makeup?” 

A weight immediately dropped from Seungcheol’s shoulders and he let out a breath of relief, grinning as well. 

He _still_ had it, hadn’t he? Kudos on him! 

“Of course, baby.” 

***

As soon as Seungcheol closed the door to let Wonwoo finish dressing up, he leaned on the wall and sighed in relief. 

All of their kids were growing up, of course they were, but _Wonwoo_ in particular. 

Wonwoo was entering his teenage years and if anything Seungcheol remembered how hard those were for him. 

Of course back then he had Jeonghan to aid him along, but it had been so confusing and weird and exciting and overall _intense_ , that Seungcheol worried everyday about their boy. 

Adult problems were scary and Seungcheol was an adult himself (he was 31 years old, _holy shit_ ), but sometimes he still felt like he was out of his league here. 

What would he do when Wonwoo wanted to start partying or get a boyfriend or girlfriend? Or maybe when he wanted to try smoking or drinking?

Oh my, time had gone by _so_ fast. 

And if Seungcheol stopped just for _one_ second to dwell on it, he was sure he’d lose it. 

He would never be able to sleep again, knowing Wonwoo was already out to face the world on his own. 

So he tried to focus on something else, as he always did when he started to drown in thoughts like these. 

When he approached Seungkwan’s room though, he caught some of the conversation between their middle kid and his husband. 

_but appa i really wanna wear this_

_but baby, please hear me out on this first_

Ah. 

Seungkwan’s costume. 

Seungcheol knew what this was about. 

And instead of entering the room, which would lead to him probably interrupting the already ongoing conversation, he decided to just lean against the wall and listen for a moment.

Seungkwan sounded whiny and Jeonghan just apprehensive, _worried_. 

So he decided to just wait for the right moment to enter instead. 

***

“Why not, appa?” Seungkwan pouted. “It’s pretty.” 

It’s not like Jeonghan didn’t _know_ about Seungkwan’s costume.

He did, he _knew_. 

He had bought it himself on a day they went shopping. 

It was a dress. 

An Elsa from Frozen dress, to be more exact. 

And… 

Why had that seemed like _such_ a good idea back then yet Jeonghan couldn’t help but to worry _now_?

Worst of it all was that Seungkwan seemed _so_ excited to be wearing this costume, he had been talking about it all week. 

(All month, if Jeonghan was being honest with himself). 

“I know it’s pretty, and I’m sure you’d look amazing in it.” Jeonghan assured him, reaching out to hold his hand. Both of them were sitting on the bed. Jeonghan had originally come to help him along with zippers and accessories and stuff like that, but now… 

Suddenly he was worried and afraid and he kind of wanted to just maybe convince Seungkwan to wear something else and just head to the party as if nothing had happened. 

What if kids made fun of him? What if _adults_ made fun of him? What if someone said something mean to him? Like _dresses are for girls_ or something like that. 

He just didn’t want to see one of his kids in pain. 

Jeonghan was _never_ this apprehensive. 

It felt weird to be this worried over something he had no control over anyway.

He couldn’t control what other people would say about their children. He couldn’t control that. 

And on occasions like these, he found it better to just be honest about his feelings. 

Lying to their children was something Jeonghan and Seungcheol usually didn’t do, they’d rather try to explain everything to them. 

“I just…” Jeonghan started, with a small sigh. How to put it into words? How to convey his fear? “Appa is worried because… there’s people that…” 

Seungkwan’s brow furrowed and Jeonghan looked down, trying to gather his thoughts. 

“Some people think that certain colors are for girls and others for boys,” Jeonghan said instead, since that seemed easier to understand. “And well, um, people think that about clothing too.” 

There was a moment of heavy silence and Seungkwan just fiddled with the baby blue fabric on his hands, determined eyes glued to the floor, and Jeonghan’s heart already ached for him. 

He didn’t mean to make him feel bad or anything. On the contrary, he just wanted to protect him, make sure he was prepared for what might happen… 

“I’m just afraid that-”

“But do _you_ think that, appa?” 

Ah, Seungkwan.

He was _so_ smart. 

There was no way to throw him off, he really seemed to read the situation better than anyone. 

Did Jeonghan think that? 

Did _he_? 

“I…” He started, wanting to say _no_. He thought that his kids, and any kids really, should be allowed to wear anything they wanted. Anything at all. 

Then _why_ was he feeling like this? 

“Of course not, baby. I… you can wear whatever you feel comfortable with.” He said, and he meant it, he really did, but he hated how vulnerable he sounded, how shaky. 

For a moment, he didn’t dare to look at Seungkwan.

He had the feeling he had fucked up. 

He was totally ruining the boy’s self confidence by doing this. Seungkwan probably didn’t care about dresses or pants or pink or blue, and _Jeonghan_ of all people was making him worry about that. 

Well done, Yoon Jeonghan. 

“Then there’s no problem about it, appa.” Seungkwan said simply, although his voice still carried an edge of sadness. 

Not for the first time since he became a parent, Jeonghan was completely baffled by one of his kids. 

It was simple as that. 

Why would Jeonghan make it complicated? 

_isn’t that too feminine for a boy?_

Okay, maybe he knew _why_. 

Memories of his own adolescence, when he had decided to grow out his hair flashed through Jeonghan’s mind and twisted his stomach painfully. 

His parents had been kind to him when he decided to marry Seungcheol and adopt children, but before that, there was a lot of criticism, a lot of comments from his parents… 

About his hair, and his clothing items and his choices. 

He’d _not_ be making the same mistakes with his kids. 

“Baby,” Jeonghan started again, tone the tiniest bit apprehensive and it must have shown, by the way Seungkwan immediately looked down, as if waiting to be reprimanded. 

And _not_ only that, Seungkwan looked disappointed as well and _hell_ if Jeonghan was going to allow his son to look like _that_ for something he’d made. 

For something he’d said. 

“Just… ignore what I just said, baby. I really think you should wear something underneath it, okay? Don’t want you to get a cold.” 

And the reaction was immediate, Seungkwan’s face lit up like the sun and the boy was grinning up at him. 

He looked the happiest and it was so reassuring. 

There was no reason to worry about what would happen. About what-ifs. Not right now at least. 

His son was happy and that was all that mattered. 

“I love you, Seungkwannie.” He reached out to fix his hair and Seungkwan’s smile grew wider, showing his teeth. Ever since the Jeju incident happened, Jeonghan made sure to show extra love to Seungkwan. 

He really didn’t want anyone to feel left out and Seungkwan being smart and very independent could easily go unnoticed.

So, Jeonghan checked on him more often. 

And it had worked wonderfully. 

He felt like Seungkwan had gained trust in him again, and he’d come to him for help, and Jeonghan couldn’t feel more relieved about that. 

“Love you too, appa.” Seungkwan said, happily, and just _then_ Jeonghan’s eyes caught the clock on his son’s night table. _Shit_ , it was so late.

They’d be late to the party. 

Really late.

He gave his son a hug and planted a kiss on his forehead. 

“Do you need help with your costume, Seungkwannie?” He asked, and Seungkwan hummed in thought, deciding to shake his head in the end. “I’m going to check on your brothers, okay?” 

Truth was, the house was _silent_ and that was never good. 

What was Channie doing? 

He wasn’t napping. And that was the _only_ time when he’d be silent. 

“I’ll come back right away though, just in case you need-” 

“I can stay here.” Seungcheol was entering the room in a second, and Jeonghan couldn’t help but frown, he never even heard Seungcheol walking down the hallway. 

“Appa, were you listening in?” Seungkwan asked, reading his own thoughts if he were being honest with himself. 

Seungcheol looked a little sheepish in response, so Jeonghan figured that their suspicious were correct. 

Seungcheol _was_ listening in. 

Probably because he worried.

But as Jeonghan looked at Seungkwan, he knew they didn’t have any reason to be. 

Their boy was fine. More than fine. 

“That’s really rude, appa.” Seungkwan said, crossing his arms against his chest and Seungcheol made his way inside, hugging Seungkwan and placing a kiss on the top of his head to say sorry.

Jeonghan resisted the urge to snicker at how blunt Seungkwan was, he did not care _at all_ about exposing any of them. 

And that was scary in itself, but also really fun, when you weren’t the target of it. 

He could leave these two all by themselves though. 

Wonwoo must have been ready by now, and now Seungkwan would be soon enough. 

Where was his other baby? 

*** 

Jeonghan knew that Chan being silent meant trouble. 

Which is _why_ when he looked all through the house, he finally found the six year old in their master bedroom, with half of their clothing items on the floor. 

It looked like a tornado had landed _only_ in their bedroom and Jeonghan _tried_ not to freak out, because he had just cleaned their room today. 

Ah. 

Having kids was an exhausting experience. 

“Baby, what happened to your costume?” Jeonghan asked, since Chan had insisted that he could definitely dress up all by himself, and that he did _not_ need help. 

Chan had picked an intricate costume this year. 

He had wanted to wear something similar to the costumes Zodiac girls had worn on their last comeback and both Mingyu and Minghao had helped to make it happen and customize it for him. 

But now apparently Chan had decided to wear something else. 

“Appa, I’m looking for a camera!” Chan said hurriedly, going through the drawers. 

Jeonghan gave up on the organization of the entire room right away and he decided to indulge on his son’s efforts of finding a camera. 

Why would he need one, he had no idea. 

Maybe he wanted to be a photographer, like Minghao or Mingyu. 

That’d make sense. 

“Oh, oh, I need this too!” He exclaimed, picking up _something_ from their night stand. 

Jeonghan’s eyes followed the movement and he almost winced when he identified the object. 

Ah, Seungcheol’s Dior glasses, his only pair. 

“But I still need a camera, appa! And this!” He frantically picked up another discarded piece of clothing, and it looked like a regular hoodie. 

Okay… 

It seemed like he was dressing up as a regular person, so far. 

“Baby,” Jeonghan started patiently, with a small smile. “I don’t know how to help since I’m not sure I know what your costume is about…” 

Chan immediately stopped in his tracks, just to cross his arms against his chest, looking indignant. 

“Can I get a hint?” Jeonghan asked right away, because he knew that Chan loved playing like this, and it’d quickly make him get rid of his bad mood. 

The boy was impatient and kind of testy when he thought people didn’t understand him, so Jeonghan would give him all the options. 

“Okaaaaay,” Chan conceded easily, with a cheeky smile. 

Jeonghan smiled as he looked at his son pulling the hoodie on (getting all his hair really messy in result), and when the child was done, he hummed in thought for a moment. 

The clothes looked huge on him, and Jeonghan couldn’t help but coo at how _adorable_ he looked. 

And the fact that he was willing to play along, it was really endearing. 

“Are you going to guess?” Chan asked and Jeonghan couldn’t help but smile fondly at their youngest, reaching out to fix his fringe away from his eyes. 

He had really been running around the room, his cheeks were pink from the effort, his clothes disheveled as if he had changed outfits countless times. 

What was on his mind? Jeonghan had no idea just yet. 

“I’ll try, okay?” 

“Okay!” Chan clapped his hands, with a focused expression on his face. “I’m… this tall!” His hand went up, but clearly that wasn’t a reliable hint since he was _tiny_ , but Jeonghan still played along, nodding seriously. “I know how to cook!” 

Okay… taller than Chan, being able to cook, a camera, could it be?

“Jeonghan-appa is my favorite person in the whole world!” For a second Jeonghan forgot he was trying to guess Chan’s costume and he was _floored_ by Chan’s declaration, his heart skipping a beat.

Glasses, the camera, having Jeonghan as his favorite person… 

Oh. 

_Oh._

The tears rolled down Jeonghan’s cheeks before he could even notice he had started crying and Chan’s immediate reaction was to frown, reaching out to cup his dad’s face. 

“Appa, why are you crying?”

“Sorry, baby.” Jeonghan let Chan clumsily wipe his tears and he smiled at the child. His heart was literally trying to burst from his chest and he couldn’t help it. “I just… really like your costume.” 

Chan’s lips parted in a surprised expression and Jeonghan resisted the urge to laugh a little at how dramatic the six year old was. 

“You guessed?” 

“I think I did,” Jeonghan admitted, voice still trembling a little. 

This kid made him _so_ emotional.

He just couldn’t help it.

“Who am I?” Chan asked, on a stage-whisper kind of voice. 

 _Jeonghan-appa is my favorite person in the whole world_. 

“You’re Seungcheol-appa, baby.” Jeonghan said, voice breaking again, as new tears started to pour. 

Ah, he couldn’t help it.

Wasn’t he the most precious baby boy ever? How could Jeonghan ever resist?

He was _so_ doomed. 

Chan pouted anyway and _hell_ if that wasn’t like Seungcheol… Jeonghan didn’t know what else was.

“Appa, if you like my costume then why are you crying?” Chan stopped his feet a little and Jeonghan couldn’t really stop now. 

He reached out to clean his own tears, and Chan immediately helped him, dabbing on the dampness of his cheeks with his sleeves. 

“Sometimes people cry when they’re really happy, Channie.” 

“They do?”

Jeonghan nodded, pulling Chan closer so he could hug him. 

“I’m sure appa will be so happy to know about your costume, baby.” And he knew Seungcheol would. 

His dream had always been being one of the kids role models and now… seeing how much the kids looked up to him. 

It made Jeonghan really proud of Seungcheol. 

Of everything they had accomplished together and individually. 

They had grown so much and he was so happy that their kids could see their efforts. 

“Appa, but I don’t have a ring, I can’t be Seungcheol-appa without one! He never takes it off!” Chan claimed with a pout, interrupting Jeonghan’s thoughts. “Can I have yours, please?” 

Ah right, a ring. 

Of course Chan needed one. 

Jeonghan looked down at his wedding band, expression suddenly serious. It wasn’t overly expensive, the only thing that they could afford as college students back then, but it held a special meaning. 

If anything _ever_ happened to it… 

“Okay, baby.” He handed it over, placing it gently on his son’s palm. “Will you promise to take care of it for me?” 

It was literally huge on Chan’s finger, sliding right off as he tried to put it on, and Jeonghan couldn’t help but to smile again when Chan nodded seriously. 

“Appa, it won’t fit.” Chan whined just a second after, eyes starting to brim with tears and as they started to fall, Jeonghan rushed to clean them with his thumb. 

Crying came so easily to Chan, and Jeonghan and Seungcheol were always trying to comfort him, to assure him things were okay. 

“Shh, love, don’t cry.” Jeonghan cooed, slowly taking off his feather necklace and placing his wedding band on the chain. The necklace was one of his favorite ones too, he had gotten it as a gift when he left _The Angel House_ , eight years ago now. 

Two of his most precious items of jewelry. 

Not everyone would hand those over to a six year old, but it turns out that _this_ six year old, was one of the most important persons in Jeonghan’s life. 

So he made sure to clean all traces of tears on his son’s cheeks and fastened the clasp of his necklace on Chan’s neck. It hung low, around Chan’s chest, but Jeonghan still smiled at him. 

“There you go.” 

“I’m all ready now, appa!” Chan assured him, pulling away enough to show Jeonghan his whole outfit. 

He was wearing a hoodie and jeans and specs (and no camera, just yet) and his necklace now. And Jeonghan was sure that no one but them would catch the meaning of this costume, but… 

It was _perfect_. 

Chan was the sweetest kid. 

“I’m Seungcheol-appa right now!” Chan assured him, and Jeonghan gently conceded with a small _you are_. 

“I love you, okay?” Today had been _such_ an emotional day, first with Seungkwan and now with Chan, and he never thought that the Halloween preparations would end up like this, but he was filled with so much love for his family, he just couldn’t stop showing it to them. 

“I love you the most.” Chan replied, hugging Jeonghan back and pressing a wet kiss right on his cheek. 

Jeonghan let out a wet laugh, pulling Chan even closer. 

“You do?” 

“Yup.” 

"I love you, Channie." He repeated, just because. 

"Appa, I'm not Channie!” Chan chastised right away. “I’m wearing my costume now." 

For a second there were just the two of them, and Jeonghan couldn’t think of anything more perfect than this moment, so he reached out, fixing Chan’s hair. 

(It was an absolute mess, and he figured that he resembled Seungcheol in that aspect too). 

“Do I get to stay forever with you now, appa?” Chan asked, cupping Jeonghan’s cheeks and _oh_ , _no_ Jeonghan would start crying all over again. 

God, he was getting weaker every year. 

Being a parent was _hard_. But it remained as the most rewarding experience ever. 

Did Chan really see them like that? As a couple who would stay together _forever_? 

Any moment now and his heart would just _burst_ with love, any _second_ now. 

“You can always stay with me.” Jeonghan promised him, and then, deciding that soon enough, Chan would get tired of all of this cheesiness, he pulled back from him a little, giving him space to breathe. 

“Appa! No more crying!” 

Ah, there it was. 

No more crying. 

Easier said than done. 

“Sorry, sorry,” Jeonghan said, planting kisses all over his son’s face again, just until Chan started to giggle and pushed him back playfully, Seungcheol’s glasses dangling dangerously off of his nose. (Oops). Jeonghan rushed to fix them. 

“Let’s go, baby.” Jeonghan had _just_ picked Chan up to leave, when Seungcheol made his way inside the room, frowning at the sight of them. 

Of course he looked a little concerned, the room was a mess, and Jeonghan himself felt like a mess too. 

Luckily he’d be able to re-apply his makeup before entering the car. 

“Hi, Channie. What’s your costume, baby?” Seungcheol asked curiously, choosing to ignore the current state of their bedroom.  

Jeonghan immediately raised a hand and Chan placed both of his hand on his own mouth, as if to not spill anything.

“Did you put on your eyeshadow already?” Jeonghan asked. 

“Yup.” 

“Is it waterproof?”

Seungcheol looked even _more_ confused now. 

“I don’t think so, why-” 

“Then we’ll tell you later.” Jeonghan assured him and Chan only giggled in response.  

Jeonghan wasn’t that much of a crier, but Seungcheol certainly was, and if they wanted to get going, they should certainly get going _right now_. 

“Why?” Seungcheol asked, whining a little, because that was the only way he knew to bend his husband’s will a little. 

“Because I said so, Cheollie.” Jeonghan said, his soft expression betraying his harsh tone as he leaned in to peck Seungcheol’s lips and head outside, towards the hallway with a very excited Chan bouncing on his arms. “Now, let’s go, we’ve got a party to attend to.”  
  
  


 

 

As soon as all five of them were inside the car, Seungcheol absently reached out to caress Jeonghan’s hand, as he made sure all the kids had buckled up, and they were ready to leave for the party. 

His gentle petting stopped, as soon as he noticed something missing on his husband’s finger. 

“Babe, where’s your ring?” 

“Appa, we’ll tell you later!” Came Chan’s voice from the backseat. “It’s a surprise!” 

Ah, right, maybe it had to do with Chan’s costume. 

He still didn’t know what the six year old had decided to do with his costume. 

“Oh.” Seungcheol nodded seriously, because he knew Chan really meant it when he said he liked to surprise them, and he wouldn’t want to spoil that. “Okay, I’ll wait then.” 

After checking all their kids had their costumes on, hadn’t forgotten anything, had their seat belts fastened, Seungcheol turned to his husband. 

It had been such a chaotic day, that Seungcheol felt he had just seeing him for the first time today. 

The way the blue and red make up highlighted his eyes, the pink blush on his cheeks and his lips…

“You look beautiful.” Seungcheol pressed Jeonghan’s hand to his lips and smiled at him, and… 

And Jeonghan positively _melted_ at that. 

“Ew! _Jeonghan-appa_ , no kissing in the car!” Seungkwan yelled, covering Chan’s eyes. 

Jeonghan and Seungcheol had to pull back to burst into laughter, and soon enough Seungkwan’s offended expression had faded and all five of them were laughing. 

Only an hour ago, the house had been filled with worries and crying and self doubt, and from time to time, it happened, but… but as long as they managed to come back to _this_ , then Jeonghan and Seungcheol knew it was all worth it.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you follow my twt then you know that lately the situation in my country it's more than chaotic, so it's been really hard for me to come back to writing, I'm really happy that I managed to finish this one off.  
> I wanted to gift this chapter to my friend Abbie since she's always supported this series and me as an author, I really appreciate your friendship and support. I hope you really like this chapter, it's mostly fluff so I'm hoping it can give you all the fuzzy feelings <3 enjoy. 
> 
> Also Kay, thank you so much for helping me proofread this at your 1 am, and my 3 am. I'm the most thankful.

**Author's Note:**

> My [twt](https://twitter.com/Wish_us_luck) and my [cc](https://curiouscat.me/Wish_us_luck)


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